Diamond Rose
by xXxTsuki
Summary: Miku is a singer. She still waits for the guy from two years ago. Someone whose name she hadn't been able to catch. When he's back, it's like a miracle. Only things seems to have changed. OC x Lavi, Kanda x Lenalee , OC x Allen
1. Chapter 1 Red Rose Greeting

Diamond Rose

Chapter 1

Red Rose Greeting

Being normal was not easy for Miku. Miku had bright red highlights in her naturally black hair, a pale, nearly flawless complexion, large blue eyes and a fairly thin frame. She had been in the talent agency since she was six. For nine years straight, she had been training there, and for five years, living in the dorms. What was her goal? To put it simply, in Brightlight Talent Agency, if you were in the music department, you were heading for a singing career. And now, Miku at fifteen, had seven live performances under her belt. All she needed now was inspiration, the song, and the contract. That was the "test" at Brightlight. You get sent on a trip to whatever country it was for two weeks, came back, and you wrote your "creative piece". It was a test. If you didn't pass, you didn't get near the pen and the contract. And to make matters worse, Miku was competing against twenty others. All ambitious, all talented. It sucked that the teachers seemed to really see something in her.

She inhaled the cold air in deeply. It felt … strange, different somehow. She was standing in front of the Cathedral of Cologne in Germany, and the area was awe-inspiring. Out of the corner of her eyes, she noticed the movements of her many classmates pull out cameras and snap away. Some were pointed at the cathedral, others at whatever landmarks around the cathedral and some, more adventures, had their eyes set on the skaters around them. It was an odd scene. In front of a large, dark gothic cathedral, you see a sea of colourful figures, speeding along, jumping, performing, practicing. Spectators adorned the edges of the square too. She then heard the brief, faraway signal from the teachers to let them roam free, and ignoring the "never be by yourself" rule, she quickly disappeared into the crowd, dodging skateboards and smiling at the strangers.

Miku stopped after twenty minutes of pure walking. She found a spot to sit and swiftly dropped down, resting her legs. She could dance for an hour straight pretty much flawlessly but you couldn't do that if you spent the whole day walking around a cathedral. She absentmindedly pulled her hat lower. As she did so, a figure racing by managed to knock her hand off her hat, leaving something of a red mark. She frowned, staring after the one responsible who had stopped and was beginning to turn around.

Her mind seemed to stop functioning properly when her eyes registered what was happening. He seemed to be at the same age as she was. Long red hair, and for some reason, and eye patch over his right eye. However this wasn't easily visible, for much of his hair was covering it. His clothing was simple. A grey shirt despite the cold and loose black jeans. And the green eyes. Green and blue met swiftly and perhaps there was a spark, but mostly, she found nothing. And before she could begin analysing what she saw, he started moving. In a direction she didn't want him to take. Which direction? The one towards her.

He knelt in front of her, and as it turned out, he was tall enough so he wasn't hugely shorter than her in his current position. As he spoke, she found a light British accent. But it was faint. Like he had been in too many places for it to stay. "Sorry, did I hit you?" How odd. Apologising before knowing he had actually done something.

Miku replied, "Yeah." It was a short answer, and she was glad they were using English. "I'm fine though." It was so difficult not to look into that green. And at the same time, so frightening.

He smiled warmly at her, "Glad that's true. Girls like you are rarities. Why are you here?" He spoke in a warm way, in a friendly way. If he was flirting, he was doing it like he wasn't doing it. Miku couldn't help noting more details. The shirt seemed well worn, as were the jeans. His skateboard seemed simple enough, but she swore there was some kind of design on the bottom. His red hair was something unique as well. It didn't have anything close to an orange lustre. No. It was more red. And even so, it looked natural.

She fingered the cuff of her coat as she answered. She was also uncomfortably aware of the watch around her wrist. Ten minutes. "I came on a two-week trip. I'm leaving tomorrow." She wondered if she was telling too much. But she couldn't help telling him. It was like a desperate plea to an unknown god, that perhaps they'd meet again. She slowly twirled a lock of hair around her finger. It was a habit she needed to get rid of. It could get misinterpreted.

He grinned at her, "Oh, I get it. Maybe I'll see you again." She found it odd that he had practically repeated what she had been thinking. Before she could answer, he stood, gave her light-hearted wave and entered the crowd again. Miku could only keep watched as he disappeared into the throng. Even if she would never see him again, this memory would remain crystal clear to her.

_It was a brief trip,_

_I never believed,_

_That I would ever,_

_Meet somebody,_

_As fascinating,_

_Beautiful,_

_Special as you,_

_You said hello,_

_That was all,_

_That was all,_

_Is it really goodbye?_

Miku dropped the pen after the last line of the verse. Although she had never intended it, every single verse or chorus revolved around her encounter. She had heard her best friend, Sorane tell her about others' topics. One was writing about the beauty of the countryside, another the busy city life. But her? She was writing about a boy. Miku had spent possibly too long pondering her topic choice. Now she was facing a crisis. You had a week to get everything right. You wrote the lyrics, the tune for the chorus, and listed what you needed for the performance. Then you had two weeks to get everything complete, then you performed. So now, she spent all her spare time, writing. Humming. Imagining.

"Miku?"

She knew that voice, looking up, she smiled, "Oh, hey Sorane."

"You're working hard."

Miku shrugged, "I have to, you know how the test works."

Sorane laughed, "Yes, I do. But you haven't experienced real hard work yet. Not in the singing department." It was well known that Sorane was in the acting sector of the talent agency. She had appeared in two movies and 1 drama. She was a child actor, but she withdrew from the business … to hone her skills.

"You actors are so dramatic."

"It's our job, silly."

Together they laughed, best friends. "True."

Sorane smiled brilliantly at her friend, green-brown eyes bright, "I hope you make it. You're amazingly talented."

Miku couldn't agree. "That is not true."

As Sorane stood to leave for her class she shook her head, "I'm pretty sure that there's a reason why my mum talks about you a lot." And she left, without a backward glance.

Miku spent the next 40 minutes scribbling on her notepad, with the finished result, she sprinted to Niyama-sensei's office. Her hand shook slightly as she raised to knock. But her teacher's voice surprised her. "Come in." Miku pushed the door open, nervous. On normal circumstances, being in this room, surrounded by the photos, instruments and CDs would have been relaxing. Oh and there's a flash stereo too. Today though, coming to Niyama-sensei, proclaiming that you had your lyrics ready was something nerve-rackingly difficult. "I've got them ready – my lyrics."

Her teacher raised an eyebrow. "That's fast." It was a well known fact that Niyama-sensei, toughest teacher in the singing field did not expect you to hand in your work before the set date, because, in her words "anything produced in a shorter amount of time is bullshit." Personally, Miku didn't agree with her teacher's opinion, but in the case of some of her classmates, she could see its truth. "Show me."

Miku handed over the notebook and almost regretted it. _Shit. It's all messy. _But she let out a huge sigh when Niyama-sensei handed it back and pulled out a blank form. She plucked a pen out of pencil tin and handed it to her along with the form. "You do know how to fill this in, right?" Miku nodded. "Good. Go to the music department when you're done. Don't bother me unless something bad comes up." And with that swift message and return of lyrics, Miku was sent away.

_I dreamt of your face,_

_I could only think,_

_About you,_

_Then I think about,_

_What I know,_

_About you,_

_-Knock – Knock – Knock-_

Miku slowly opened her eyes. She was still in her pyjamas, in bed, her alarm clock had gone off some while ago and for some reason, someone was knocking on her door. The events of last night flashed through her mind. The performance was indeed nerve-racking as were the storm of congratulations and positive comments that had rained down on her. _Did they already make the decision? No way._ She raced to the door and had it open in a second, regardless of her dress. Even with her bed hair, she was going to hear what they were telling her. Only it wasn't any of the teachers. Instead, stood Allen Walker, a friend who was currently studying to become a song-writer. An immediate blush ascended onto Miku's features as she nearly slammed the door into his face. "You freaked me out! Don't go knocking on my door first thing in the morning!"

By then, the white-haired youth was laughing his head off. "God, the look on your face!" Despite the situation, Miku couldn't help admiring her friend. His green eyes and white hair was something odd, it stood out. His choice of clothes was also something odd, yet it suited him well. A white dress shirt, clearly rarely ironed, a black vest, black pants and a fingerless glove on his left hand. It was clear that he was very capable of turning heads in the hallways. "Anyway, just wondering, do you want to come with Sorane and I?"

Miku smirked, "There's some thing missing in your question, where?"

Allen smiled hugely as he answered, "Out into the city, shopping time as Sorane calls it!"

Miku did not waste time saying she was coming, she just closed the door in Allen's face and behind the door, it was clear what she was doing. Rummaging through her belongings for whatever she needed. As Allen leaned on the wall outside, Sorane, already prepared rushed up to him. "She's getting ready?"

"Yup."

"You know, I know what you're thinking."

Allen raised and eyebrow, frowning, "I don't follow."

Sorane rolled her spectacular eyes, "Miku and I will be shopping for clothes, shoes, possibly magazines and CDs."

"So?"

"Don't act dumb."

"No I'm no-"

"IF YOU RUN OFF TO BUY FOOD INSTEAD OF HANGING WITH US I'LL KILL YOU."

Obviously, Sorane's vocal chords were in very good shape. At that moment, Miku had opened her door, wincing. Her bed hair was sufficiently flattened and she looked amazing in her black dress pants, "I love Paris" shirt, striped arm warmers and ballet flats. However, Sorane clearly did not approve. "GET THOSE OFF RIGHT NOW!"

"Geez, why?"

"I am tired of you going for that "awesome explosion of clothes look", it's so horrible!"

"What the heck! Are you insulting my fashion sense?"

"Yes I am!"

Miku was whining as Sorane dragged her back into the room, "I look fine and you know it!" Both girls were arguing, completely oblivious of Allen's thoughts about them.

"You look tardy! I know you have better clothes! You just never wear them!"

"And how does that affect my life? It's not that important!"

"You're such a stupid friend!"

"Prove it to me."

Sorane started speaking in such a extravagant way Miku swore her eyes were sparkling. "To begin with, once you become a fantastic singer, you'll have to have good fashion sense, mainly because the tabloids will flame you if they catch you wearing something hideous. At parties, you need to know how to look presentable and pleasant. Also," Miku could tell this was the biggest point, "You're never going to get a boyfriend the way you dress!"

"When did I say I wanted one?"

Sorane stopped at that, staring. "No."

"Yes."

"_You're still waiting."_

_I would wait for eternity,_

_It doesn't matter,_

_Where you are,_

_When you are,_

_As long as I find you again,_

_As long as we,_

_Meet again,_


	2. Chapter 2 Sing the Snow Away

Diamond Rose

Chapter 2

Sing the Snow Away

Three seiyuu jobs, five advertisements, a contract and debut single finally led Miku to this position in her career. She was seventeen now, her long black hair had been relieved of the bright red highlights. Instead, she had been left with one streak of red on the left side. Her bright blue eyes still enchanted passer-bys and she was still pale, as though she was made out of snow. She was still thin, no matter what she ate, and interestingly, her fashion sense had improved dramatically. She was a girl of dresses and faux fur now. Today, she was being driven to the company building, where she was told to meet her new "team". She had pestered her manager about it the day before but no answers had been given. Nothing. So she would have to simply find out herself.

Miku stepped inside the room, her blue eyes travelling over the faces. Some she knew, like Lenalee, her stylist, Allen, surprisingly and some others. She headed for the empty seat beside Allen almost immediately, she slipped in, speaking to him in lowered tones. "What's all this about?"

The white-haired seventeen-year-old tapped a pile of documents on the table in front of him, there was something of a tired look on his face, "They're doing a collaboration project, I happen to be the one in charge of writing-"

Miku glared at him, "I don't want to know about your job. I already know. Sorane complains about your bombardment of her inbox about your job. Tell me about my job." She tapped a gloved finger on the marble table impatiently. Her manager sighed visibly at the singer's behaviour, glad that nobody was protesting against her.

Allen, a bit annoyed started explaining, "They're getting a new British singer – he knows Japanese. You two are going to be a duet." He stopped there, letting the information sink in.

She nodded slowly, thinking, and the door opened. Naturally, her gaze was drawn to the door, and what she saw shocked her to the core. It was him. The red-haired boy from two years ago in Cologne. Miku almost didn't dare to breathe. Was this a dream? True, he had changed. His ears were pierced now, her had grown taller by a large amount, yet he still seemed the same in many ways. Then she visibly flinched when he looked at her. And said nothing. There was no sign of any recognition on his face. Just the lazy-looking smile he had on since he entered. When he and his manager, a rather old-looking man with long hair, had been seated, the meeting began. Miku forced herself to focus on the information, the questions, the answers, but inside, she was feeling a terrible loneliness.

_I've waited,_

_Forever and too long,_

_Until I met you,_

_How could you forget,_

_Forget me,_

_And break this heart?_

"Nice to meet you, Kawaguchi-san."

Miku stared up at him. There was a good 10 cm difference in their heights, that was one thing she noticed, another was her own failure to have a friendly expression on her face. "Same, Lavi."

Lavi laughed slightly, "Oi, you don't seem really happy to meet me."

She cocked up an eyebrow, "Oh, am I supposed to?" She knew a little about hi background, after all, how could she ignore all the information piled onto her by her manager through sneaky notes under the table during the meeting? Yes, her manager was pretty interesting.

He studied her, looking straight at her eyes, unafraid. "You've heard, huh?" The smile he had previously been displaying darkened a fraction, as though he was suddenly irritated by something.

Miku shrugged, "What have I heard?"

"I have a reputation, huh."

Inside her mind, Miku agreed. _Heck yes, playboy. _But despite this new opinion of him, she was still suffering. It was heartbreak. Perhaps it was a one-sided love, but still. "Guess so."

"That sucks. Maybe I should try going on the straight and narrow."

Again, scepticism. "I can so totally see that happening."

"I can recognise sarcasm when I hear it."

Now it was her turn to laugh, "Yeah. Anyway, we should start thinking-"

"Oh yeah! I was wondering about that."

Miku, confused, questioned him, "What?"

"I heard that you wrote this awesome song when you were fifteen."

She wasn't looking forward to that question. At that moment, Miku felt something die. Maybe it was just all the hopelessness she was gathering. For those two years, she had day-dreamed and wished for the day they would meet again. But those two years had been littered with both bad and good memories. The farewell of Sorane to Korea for a year, the birth of her new cousin Honoka, Sorane's heartbreak. These were only some of things in those two years. And those were the ones not including her career problems. Rejections, dropped projects, competition. It was her life now, and she had grown to accept those things. But during those times, and now, she had gazed up at the sky, at the stars, wondering if that mysterious boy she had met would come into her life again. By thinking of those things now, tears began to gather at her eyes. Slowly, one fell, as though in slow motion. And when Miku realised what was happening.

And ran.

_When did you,_

_Forget about me,_

_When did,_

_My heart,_

_Break so bad,_

_So it no longer,_

_Felt the joy,_

_Of my songs,_

_When?_

_Can you repair it?_

_I hope so,_

Miku lay on her bed, staring up at the ceiling. It was 7:00pm, the lights were off, and she was watching the colours of the city dance on her ceiling. Her room was much larger than any normal bedroom, it was more like a living room furnished to be a bedroom. Her bedspread was white, dotted with snowflakes, paper snowflakes dangled from her high ceiling, she had various beanbags and plush toys, and the wardrobe was nearly overflowing with clothes. The two bookshelves were crammed with manga and CDs. Some of the CDs were by her mother, her teacher, another was an OST given to her by Sorane. Her room, although clean beyond belief, the floor sparkling white, was a warm place. And yet, to Miku, it was also a place for her to cry her worries away. She was crying so much her vision was blurring. Tomorrow, she would be able to mask her tears with a bright smile and hopefully trick everyone into believing she was fine.

So in the morning, she left the house, wearing a black minidress, white crop jacket, black stockings and knee-high boots. She walked out, winding a blue scarf around her neck. Today was one of those days where she had an hours spare time before it was time for work. She cherished those days. As Miku made her way down the street, she was surprised to see a motorcycle pull up beside her. She was even more surprised to see the rider. Lavi. A sudden pained expression appeared on her beautiful features. She couldn't even bring herself to look at him.

"Morning."

Slowly, she dragged her gaze to his face, his expression made her want to throw up. _That conceited grin … I haven't seen it before … how can I still love him like this? _"Good morning, what are you doing here? Isn't it free time right now?" Miku was under the assumption that they had similar schedules.

Lavi nodded, pulling out another helmet and offering it to her as he spoke. "Yup, it is! I thought I could take you out or something. To get to know you better." There was a bright warmth in his eyes, and that made his smile and offer seem so genuine, but Miku couldn't trust it. Two years ago, she would have. But now? He had lost that trust she had in him in one day.

Miku watched as her arm reached out tentatively, instead she withdrew when she got close. Left hand clutching her wrist. "I'm sorry. I don't want to." It was a clear lie.

And Lavi didn't believe her. "Stop lying. I know you want to." However he stopped there. In a series of quick movements, he had turned off the engine, tossed both helmets onto the ground and had his hands on her shoulders. For a moment, Miku panicked, _what's he doing?_ But it turned out, the panic was basically pointless. In one swift movement, he had managed to pull Miku to the ground, now both of them were sitting on the sidewalk, face to face. Here, he smiled at her hugely, eyes bright, warm, trustworthy, safe. "Now, let's talk."

Miku hesitated, "You … came to talk."

An awkward expression, something similar to embarrassment seemed to wash over him in an instant, and then disappear. "Yeah, I guess. You really don't seem to like me, at all. I can't see us doing any good work together right now."

Now that was something she hadn't thought of. "Oh yeah … if we can't get along we probably won't be able to do any good work."

Lavi laughed, "Okay! So let's get to work talking!"

Miku blushed hard when he spoke. It was a statement so innocent, so pure, that she wouldn't have believed him capable of saying something like it. "Sure…" It was an awkward answer to his declaration, but Miku couldn't help feeling something warm.

_My heart still flies,_

_When you look,_

_Right at me,_

_It doesn't matter when,_

_You make me feel,_

_Different,_

_When you look,_

_Right at me,_

_My heart races,_

"Miku-chan!"

Miku turned her head to her manager, who was happily waving what looked like an invitation of some sort. She raised an eyebrow, "What is it?"

"It's time to rub shoulders with some other celebrites."

This was not what she had been expecting. "This is weird, where am I going?"

"Well, in truth, one of Lavi's colleagues want you to go to their party. She's a very famous model in Europe, it's her birthday and she's working in Japan currently."

"Now that makes sense."

Miku's manager smiled hugely, and then her brown eyes started glaring. "Now, it's time you got rid of that plain garb."

The seventeen year-old girl instinctively looked down at her attire. A black vest over a white long-sleeved dress. Okay, maybe it was a little plain. But it was elegant! She felt somewhat confident in those clothes! "There's nothing wrong with them!"

"You just don't wear that to a party! It's too plain. And besides, you have to sing there, you need to look spectacular!"

"Shit."

After an hour of complaining in Lenalee's presence, Miku really did look spectacular. Her black hair was held up in a loose bun by a hairpin, leaving much hair dangling down her neck. The dress in Miku's opinion was hideous. Short, lowback, but at least it had sleeves. Bell sleeves. And that was the only thing she liked about it. Then came the shoes. As expected, they were stilettos. Miku abhorred stilettos. Stilettos? For her? No. For Sorane, hell yes. HER THOUGH? No. She could barely walk with them. Let alone do a decent performance.

As she started down the stairs out of the building towards the limousine patiently waiting, she sudden found her ankle going in some odd sideways direction and then the nearly slipping off the step. Nearly, because she grabbed onto the railing … and at the same time somebody grabbed her free arm. It was a warm, firm grasp. And she felt that it would never let go, or hoped so. Looking up, Miku's heart jumped and plummeted at the same time. Lavi.

His red hair humg over his eye-patch, at the same time, making him look incredibly handsome. He looked somewhat out of place in a tuxedo, as she had only seen him in more casual, laid-back clothes until now. But as it turned out, he could look good in formal wear too. Everything was black, even the tie. But he looked amazing. She could let herself go for one night. Just one. Perhaps it wouldn't hurt today.

_I'll let myself go,_

_There are things I can do,_

_Now that my heart,_

_Is free to fly,_

_Ignoring all the troubles,_

_Of the real world,_

_I'll fly up high,_

_Not thinking,_


	3. Chapter 3 Black Rose Tears

Diamond Rose

Chapter 3

Black Rose Tears

After one song, several compliments and many hurried "excuse me"s Miku finally found herself on a couch by herself, silently watching everything progress around her. To be honest, Miku didn't like her position. First off, Lavi had ditched her as soon as they entered, and it was quite clear who he was making a beeline for : the nearest attractive woman. Second, it was the stilettos. She could handle walking on them … nearly. But she wasn't a pro yet. So naturally, she had ordered herself to sit and let her feet rest. But five minutes after she sat down, her momentary rest period was destroyed. How? As it turned out, Lavi had gotten rejected, seeing as the model he was hitting on already had a boyfriend. Bad choice. He was still grinning though, amused as she moved to sit beside her.

He turned to her, blinking, "Now this wasn't what I was expecting."

She stared back at him, and narrowed her cold blue eyes a fraction, "What do you mean?"

"You're being mean to me again. Was that talk session yesterday worth nothing."

Miku could not say no. Because it was the truth. "That, I enjoyed, slightly. This party, I am not enjoying. Usually I would. But today, no. I do not enjoy it." As she spoke, she glanced down meaningfully at her dress, and then glared at her heels. "Mainly my clothes. But there are other reasons."

Lavi studied her as she spoke, and for some reason, she felt like there was a giant spotlight on her, seeing right through her. He chuckled after she finished talking. "Oh, is someone irritating you?" There was a teasing tone in his voice, and for once, she found it attractive. How odd. But at the same time, annoying. She didn't need him saying those things to her. "Or maybe you're bored." There it was again.

She sighed, letting the loud music – thank god, drown out that sigh. "There are many reasons why I am not pleased." All of a sudden, she had switched to the formal language that she usually used when discussing things with the producers of her music, oh crap. Not cool. "It's just that …"

"You're bored. That's it." He took one glance, just one at their surroundings and all of a sudden, he had leaned in, so close, she could count his eyelashes and see the many shades of green that made up the iris of his eye. And almost immediately, a heavy rush of heat filled her cheeks. _Shit. _"Want to have some fun?" Under normal circumstances – when she was alert, thinking well, in a clear, quieter environment, she would have done something smarter, when she still could have done something. But she just sat there, blushing. Oh the troubles of night-time and exhaustion.

So he leaned in, both hands pulling her gently, ever so gently, like was a dream to him. Their lips met. It was impossible to describe the feeling in a sentence. She needed at least a million pages. About how soft his lips were. The feeling of his skin. How different it felt. The pressure. A horrified jolt streaked down her spine. _No. She didn't want this. _But Miku couldn't ignore that, before that hurt feeling inside her started, she was feeling some kind of intense joy. Lavi was kissing her. Lavi, the boy from two years ago. Lavi, who came back into her life. And then she thought again. The worst thing she had ever thought. Lavi, who forgot me. So she slowly lifted a hand, as though she didn't want it to move, and at the same time, was ordering it, demanding it, to move. And she slapped him. It wasn't hard, and she knew that the recipient would be able to feel the hesitation in it. But she didn't care. She just wanted to get up, and run.

_That … was my first kiss_

As it turned out. He had two sides. There was the reasonable side, the honest side she had seen since two years ago and the day before yesterday. Where he took things seriously, didn't mess around, and seemed so genuine. And then the part he was so notorious for. The … playboy. There were certainly plenty of rumors, and it was easy to see why. But coming to accept that fact … that was something entirely different. This person, whom she had built up to be perfect in a period of two years, how could Miku allow herself to completely ruin his image in her eyes?

So the next day, she was sitting down, sipping her juice, glad to find that they were recording the A-Side she sang alone first. She didn't want to go through all the problems of facing him again, especially after that slap. The problem was, that today, throughout the recording session, she had only managed the entire song once, and they weren't satisfied. Luckily for her, she had a friend who she could rely on.

"I don't get it. Something's wrong isn't it?"

She really could rely on him, "Allen, it's not something we should be brooding on."

He shook his head as he sat down beside her, "I disagree. We need to sort out this problem of yours, then, we can finally focus on your career." Obviously, he truly did place friendship very highly. Maybe below food but … very highly.

Miku shook her head, "Thanks, but no thanks. I'll work it out by myself." She smiled at him. There was a lot in that smile. It was something on the joyful side, like she was grateful. And yet, underneath the outer layer, there was a pain. It wasn't huge, it was difficult to notice, but it was there. A sorrow that was yet to be rid of.

Allen despised it, listening to that voice, to him, it was painful, listening to a friend suffer and yet refuse to confide in anyone their problems. At the same time, he felt that he was wrong. He had attempted to help, but by doing so, had poked into Miku's personal life, and in various way, that was something he shouldn't have done.

Miku, only seventeen still had school, only her job allowed her to get out of it most of the time, thanks to busy schedules spammed with interviews, photoshoots, recording sessions and live performances. Even so, her manager, decent as always when it came to "normal life" went ahead and gave Miku a whole day, dedicated to school. Being away from school was a large handicap, some celebrities her age had actually dropped out, one of them being Sorane, her best friend.

Either way, Miku was now sitting in her seat beside the window, trying to pay attention and not pay attention at the same time. This proved very difficult, and she couldn't help breathing a sigh of relief when the bell rang, allowing everyone to relax, some people jumping out of their seats, others remaining seated, talking. Some though, swarmed to Miku's seat. It had been a big thing, her first day there, full of "oh my god"s and "it's her!".

"Kawaguchi-san!"

Miku turned away from the boring view out the window, "Oh, yes?"

"I was wondering, how are you?"

Miku put on her best smiling face, "Oh, I'm fine, how are you, Fukui-san?"

The face the ordinary-looking girl had kind of annoyed Miku, was it really that shocking to have your name remembered by a member of your class? Oh wait, _I'm not actually part of the class. I'm a singer._

"O-oh, I'm good."

And so went on the boring "conversation."

But while that went on, Miku's mind drifted off to elsewhere, as she thought. It was all Lavi. Lavi, Lavi, Lavi, Lavi. She couldn't get him out of her head. When she was finally permitted to leave, she stepped out of the school gates, eying the painted Kanji characters stating her school's name. She glanced down the street, at the few people walking around. She observed the other kids who were still there, wandering around, talking to one another. But suddenly all that grew silent as a limousine pulled up in front of her, and Lavi, casually dressed stepped out. Miku blinked once as he approached. "How did you find out which school I went to?"

He laughed, "I asked your manager."

She raised an eyebrow, suspicious, "Really?"

Lavi looked straight into her eyes, "Yes."

Miku sighed, giving up, "Okay, whatever." And here, she swiftly brushed past him, not realizing how attractive she currently looked to him in her tailored black school uniform. She opened the door to the limousine before anyone else could open the door for her. And she disappeared behind the tinted windows. Lavi followed, approaching the same door, But as he neared, the window wound down, and Miku's gaze was sharp, cold, demanding. Her tone of voice was actually somewhat frightening. "You come in here and I will kill you." So naturally, he left that door, and approached the one behind.

"Wait."

"Yes?"

"Why are we at the studio? I don't have anything scheduled –"

Lavi rolled his eyes, "Well, I do."

Miku rounded on him, "Then why didn't you say so?"

"Well, I _was_ going to."

She didn't believe him, "Liar. You weren't."

He shrugged, a lazy smirk decorating his features, "So what? I get to show you my talents."

"Right."

"I'm hurt, it sounds like you don't believe that I can produce good music."

"That's not it."

"What then?"

She had turned away from him, "I just don't believe it's right to show off."

"Eh? Shouldn't us entertainers always do that?"

She shook her head, still not looking at him, but rather out the window. "You're right. I used to do that too." There was a long pause before she spoke again. "Until I got that seiyuu job."

"What seiyuu job?"

"Don't worry. "

And with that, they exited and Lavi leading the way, entered the building. Miku's facial expression quickly brightened up when she saw Lenalee and Allen there. "Hey, Allen! Lenalee!"

Allen looked up from the music sheets he was meticulously penning on notes and nearly destroyed the piles or books and CDs on his desk. "Oh, hi Miku. How was school?" As he spoke, the white-haired youth clicked the pen and dropped it onto the glass table.

"School sucks." Miku laughed after saying so, "Well, it's not bad, but I don't see myself learning anything."

Lenalee tutted, "Miku-chan, keep going to school."

"I know."

With that her stylist smiled broadly, "Awesome. Now, to business. I know it wasn't on that schedule you were emailed last night, but the job's only turned up now, and we got Lavi to bring you over."

Oh, he was _so_ dead now. "What job?" A short list popped up in Miku's head. If they got Lenalee to turn up, seeing as she was the only stylist who Miku seemed to be able to stand, it must be something pretty special. "Photoshoot?" That seemed to be the only likely possibility. You couldn't get a TV live organised in such a short time …

"Not quite." It was Allen who answered after he ate his meat bun, "Some fashion company, they fail to interest me. Anyway, they want you for a commercial." He lifted the paper, already dog-eared an slightly crumpled. "I had to write this up in 4 hours."

"Holy shite."

Lenalee sighed, "Don't say that, Miku."

"I didn't say shit."

The stylist had miraculously pulled out a hair straightener and rapped Miku on the head with the metal object what was capable of reaching 200ºC. "I don't mean that. I mean do your job, don't whine and come with us to the recording studio."

Before Miku went anywhere though, she turned to Allen, "If I'm not wrong, that's going to be our debut, right?"

One nod.

"Well, whoever's organizing this mess is bloody stupid." And she stalked away, school shoes clacking on the tiled floor.

_Did I always believe,_

_That life was,_

_Always perfect?_

_Did anyone,_

_Ever tell me?_

_Did anybody,_

_Ever decide that,_

_I would be fine, _

_Living in this scary world?_


	4. Chapter 4 Hopeful Blooms

Diamond Rose

Chapter 4

Hopeful Blooms

One of Miku's earliest memories was watching her mother perform. Tomoko Kawaguchi was quite well-known some time ago. She had been four years old, a chilly February and her mother, at 27, was nearing the end of her career. Tomoko, went by the stage name of Chito K. and had a loyal fandom since her debut album hit no. 2 on the Oricon charts. Tomoko had only been 18 then. Miku had been carried by her father at one of Tomoko's last concerts. Tokyo Dome was filled and there wasn't a single spare seat left. Just watching her mother had made her want to be like her. Tomoko's brilliance was infectious, her smile was radiant, her voice strong. At four, Miku had been entranced.

And then, at nine, her world came crashing down. Tomoko Kawaguchi, 31 could not be revived after the car accident. It had shaken the media for an entire month, especially since there had been two vehicles from rival TV stations following the car. The three people left in the family attended the funeral, their father, Hayate had shed many tears, Miku stood silent, while she kept her brother in her embrace as his crying howls filled the cold air. Miku's five year old brother, Ayumu Kawaguchi, had been left without a mother, their father, busy as ever with managing another drama, could only trust Miku to play both the mother and the sister, taking care of Ayumu. For a long time, she had left that dream in the dirt, even quitting the talent agency she had been training in, until they were cleaning the house and found a large stack of magazines and photos in a drawer. It contained pictures of their mother, Tomoko, and added to the collection of photos that they would change everyday.

Ayumu had studied his twelve-year old sister when they found them, "Onee-chan?"

She looked at him, "Yeah?"

"Don't you want to be like mum?" As it turned out, eight year olds knew more than they let on.

Miku stared at him a bit before answering, "Yeah. I used to."

Now she was standing behind that glass, the music playing behind her, the lyrics in front of her.

_Painful memories_

_Sink deeply in the depths of my heart_

_The pain of loneliness_

_That no one else knows_

_Why do I always_

_Lose the most precious things?_

_The neverending rain_

_Sings of sadness again_

They cut the music. Allen was the one standing there, earphones now around his neck. He wasn't glaring, rather the look in his eyes mirrored the ones of Lavi's. Worry. Allen didn't need to talk to get the question across. And to answer, Miku shook her head and forced her tears away. And then placed her blue eyes onto the actual lyrics. And as always, she could do justice to Allen's works.

_That day, you believed in_

_the wind that blows from the future._

_Tomorrow will dance even higher for us..._

_Time goes by,_

_Even though time passes, there are things that never change._

_Because I can't reach it, because I want to find it,_

_I go to search for the wings of dreams,_

_Stay by my side, forever..._

Allen breathed a sigh of relief as she sang, Lavi joining in later. His voice, he noted, didn't go with Miku's like the way he had hoped, but at least they were getting the job done … not that badly either. But as the song went on, he realized that Miku had stopped looking at the lyrics. She was still singing the write words, with the right notes. It really seemed as though she was taking up the footsteps Tomoko Kawaguchi was taking. But Miku was the only person in the room who knew this. There was a new joy in her voice as she realized what she could do. It was a small accomplishment, and the editing team would have to most definitely pull an all-nighter to get their job done.

Meanwhile, Lenalee was sitting in a conference room. They were planning the advertisement, shots, colour, contrast. The different messages were fired across the room, and the Chinese stylist remained silent, just watching until one of the questions, went to her. "Lee-san? I'm wondering, what type of style were you going to go for with Kawaguchi and Bookman?"

Lenalee glanced down at the huge notebook, 6 centimeters think in her lap. "I have plenty of ideas. Which one I go with depends on what you want."

The red-haired (clearly not natural) responded with a slightly strange look, as though sizing up an opponent, yet they were in no way enemies. They came from different dimensions in the entertainment biz, were different ages, and of different nationalities. A few seconds later of this silence, she spoke, "That's fabulous, Lee-san." She moved swiftly to an empty seat beside Lenalee, "I've worked with a multitude of stylists before, some from Europe, or America, Korean too, and of course many of your colleagues, but I haven't come across any stylist so flexible."

Lenalee was amused by this, "So I'm something special, eh?" She laughed a little and stuck out her hand. It was a friendly gesture, "I think I will enjoy working with you."

She shook her hand and at the same time, spoke, "You don't know my name, do you?"

The Chinese stylist shook her head, "I overheard some people speaking to you and heard the name Taguchi, but that was all."

"Aiko, Taguchi Aiko, pleased to meet you!"

It was very simple this meeting in the middle of a conference room, that was quickly interrupted by budget and camera angles.

Lavi sat on the rooftop of the hotel he was staying at. It was midnight, and the lights of Tokyo were lively, interesting, fascinating to behold. But that wasn't why he was there. Normally, when he was on the roof, it was because he was drunk, hungover, needed a break from a wild party or just sleepy. But today, he was here for a different reason. He wasn't quite aware of the fact that his being here was vastly different from the previous times, but he was aware that he was spending an unusually large amount of time considering what to do with Kawaguchi Miku. Obviously he couldn't just downright sleep with her, mainly because he was working with her on a daily basis, no holidays and he could tell that she was capable of being extremely nasty. Even worse, was that he didn't know if he would stop thinking about her after he did so. There were other possibilities. Like seriously dating her, or downright demanding never to spend time with her again.

Whatever the answer was, 5 minutes later, he gave up on attempting finding one. And silently, hands deep in his pockets, he walked back to his hotel room, collapsed on the bed, completely ignorant of whatever the next day was to bring.

"Miku. Get. Up,"

Three words that reached her stirring conscience can have a lot of impact sometimes. Depending on whom it was saying it. She laid there, eyes stirring behind closed eyelids. And a moment later, they flicked open, blinked slowly, as if they were made out of a fragile crystal and she began to rise. Turning into, a more tarnished, stronger, yet brilliant gem as she rubbed her eyes, wishing away the sleep that had settled there not too long ago. "Mornin' Ayumu."

Ayumu was now a healthy bright-eyed 13 year old. His school uniform hung from his thin frame in a slightly odd manner, but it looked good enough. Black hair hung in his blue eyes which had often searched his sister's for answers when he was younger. "Dad left already. Breakfast's downstairs on the table." He had thrown open Miku's curtains earlier. That was why the room was so bright.

Miku nodded as she draped a dressing gown over her shoulders, despite the baby blue alarm clock sitting on her desk, she questioned her younger brother, "What's the time?" She had recalled a 10:45 am meeting, and something like an informal meeting before that …

"It's only eight-thirty."

"Good. That means I can sleep in."

"No you can't."

"Why not?"

"Your producer's on hold right now. She wants to talk to you."

"Eh, Ayu-chan, you tell me that now?"

_Life's an endless tunnel,_

_A kaleidoscope,_

_A __colourful__ whirl,_

_Of everything in this world,_

_The tunnel's always gonna end,_

_But enjoy the rainbows,_

_While you're still traveling,_

_This kaleidoscopic tunnel …_


	5. Chapter 5 Kaleidoscopic Diamond

Diamond Rose

Chapter 5

Kaleidoscopic Diamond

Ayumu's twelfth birthday had most definitely been his most memorable one. Not because of the presents, but more because of what happened. He had been awake unbelievably early, at exactly 5:30 am and it was still dark. But he had still gotten up, and stared out the window. Because Miku was going to miss his birthday. She was sixteen now, staying temporarily at that talent agency before her contract was finalized. But she was still taking lessons. And no way would she ditch lessons. And besides, it was the 13th. A day before Valentines' Day. Surely she and her friends would be busy in one way or another.

7:00am

"Ayumu."

He turned around as he was pulling on a school blazer, "Yeah, dad?"

"Happy Birthday."

Ayumu laughed, "That's it?"

His father shook his head, "Your breakfast's really good."

He grinned, "Awesome."

"Yes. Anyway, I can't skip work today, my boss wants a Valentines' Day special. Live. Which is always hectic to organise." He leant down so he was closer to his son's eye level, "But work is work. And even though just saying happy birthday isn't enough, at least I remembered."

Ayumu loved that about his father – Hayate remembered everything, always, but sometimes he wondered if it was compensation for some of his wrongs in the past, "It's okay."

10:00am

"Oi, Ayu-chan!"

Ayumu looked up, grinning, "Ren, stop calling me that."

Ren was Ayumu's best friend, and possibly the one most unlikely to be it. He had brown hair, green-brown eyes, a pierced ear, and his personality was a rowdy one, and as a bizarre twist, perhaps induced by his name (written in kanji as "romance") often referred to his friends with the prefix –chan, no matter who they were. "Fine, fine. Anyways, happy birthday!" He tossed something into his friend's hands.

Ayumu held it up, "A moon?" It was a keychain, a silver moon dangling from the string, "Why a moon?"

Ren laughed, "Didn't we meet during school camp at night?"

Ayumu finished for him, "Yeah. At night. I was sleeping, dumbass. Why the hell were you tossing pebbles at night?"

2:10pm

"I hope there's no theory lesson this time."

Ayumu blinked as Ren said this. They were entering the music block of their private school, Ren had his ears plugged into his iPod and was almost waiting for a teacher to tell him off. "How come?"

Ren sighed, "Do you always have to space out after 12:00pm everyday?"

Ayumu frowned, "I don't."

His best friend ignored the comment and continued speaking, "Music's usually fun, but when we do theory, it's just really boring, besides, didn't your sister tell us that once?" Everything seemed to freeze then as Ren turned to face Ayumu. "Hey, what happened to her? I haven't seen her here in ages."

Ayumu stopped walking, his black hair falling into his eyes. If you had met both siblings, it would be ridiculously easy to say that they were family. Both shared the blue eyes that their mother Tomoko had passed onto them, and both had the glorious raven-black hair their father Hayate had. "She's …"

Ren was staring, and normally talkative Ren, wasn't talking.

He continued to fumble for words, "She's not living at home…" and gave up. "Come on, let's get to class." And dragging Ren by the arm, they entered the classroom where everybody else was seated, and stood in the doorway, shocked. Because there, sitting where their music teacher usually sat, was Miku, dressed in black jeans and a shirt that she had frequently worn when she had been fourteen, and still very much playing the elder sister and mother role.

She grinned, tossing her long black hair over her shoulder as she spoke, "Sit down, Ayumu, Ren, class is starting."

Ayumu couldn't help noting that her red highlights were gone – when had she gotten rid of them?

Miku stood, clapping her hands twice, "Unfortunately, Agano-sensei is unable to make it to class, so I will be taking you today." She gestured to what she had written on the board, despite a long time of almost not writing anything and very little academic education for a year, her writing was still amazingly neat. "Today will be a practical lesson, divide into groups with a minimum of two people, find a practice room, and compose a happy birthday song!" She pointed to a stack of blank music score sheets, "Take three sheets, I want what you have penned down ten minutes before the end of the lesson, everyone." As she spoke, the class started buzzing with excitement, despite the simplistic and innocent topic, it was interesting. But before Ren and Ayumu could make it out of the room, she grabbed her brother by hugging him and dragging him back to his seat. She winked at Ren as she spoke to her brother, "I have things to discuss with you."

"_Onee-chan?"_

"_Yeah?"_

"_What are you doing?"_

_She was sitting on her bedspread, patterned with feathers, and flicking through a magazine. Only now, she had stopped at a page. "Nothing, Ayumu. Is something wrong?"_

_Ayumu had been hoping for some help with algebraic equations, but didn't know what to do now. Had he stumbled onto something important? "I wanted to ask …"_

_Miku smiled at him, "Just ask, Ayu-chan."_

_Ayumu shook his head, "I changed my mind – sorry."_

_As he walked out of the room, his sister just watched. The magazine in her lap was still there, now closed, but it disturbed him to see her clutching it so tightly. Like something as pathetic as that was her lifeline._

"What do you want to talk about, Miku?"

She sighed, still smiling, "I'm not onee-chan anymore?"

Ayumu shook his head, he didn't hate his sister. It was just that she had done such an unforgivable thing, leaving him alone. "Onee-chan is always going to be onee-chan."

Miku crossed her arms, "Did you think I'd forget your birthday?"

Embarassed, he nodded, "Common sense dictates that you would."

Ren stood some distance away, leaning against the wall, smiling, as he murmured to himself, "How touching."

_Miku stood in front of the door, speaking to her father. The taxi had pulled up and her suitcase was being put in the back. Her blue eyes flicked over to see Ayumu at the window, but he wasn't talking, nor looking at her. She turned away, sighing to continue speaking to her father. __"Father, I'll be fine-"_

"_Miku, I'm not worried about that. I'm meaning that in the long run-"_

_She smiled a brave smile for her father, "I'll be fine, I promise."_

"_Miku, you can't promise these things."_

_She didn't reply immediately like her father had expected, rather, she kept staring at the window, before murmuring, "I can do anything for Ayumu and Mother." And with those words, she left home._

Miku reached into the handbag that was sitting on the teacher's desk. She pulled out an object handing it to Ayumu. He took it tentatively, as though he wasn't sure that he was supposed to. She smiled at him, and the twelve year-old couldn't help feeling a rush of nostalgia. Like when they were much younger, and when Ayumu got bullied in primary school, Miku just winked and gotten rid of them, like when he lost the house keys and she found them buried beneath a pile of schoolbooks, like when he fell over and Miku was there, smiling gently and reassuring him that everything was going to be okay as she cleaned that graze. So he opened whatever it was that she had given him.

To find a kaleidoscope.

He looked up at her, "Hey, why a kaleidoscope?"

Miku laughed, and ruffled her brother's hair, "'Cos you asked for one when you were seven!"

_For a long time,_

_I believed that she had left,_

_To r__un after dreams,_

_That would never come to her,_

_And she'd forget,_

_Everything about me,_

_Guess though,_

_I was really wrong,_

_About matters like these …_


	6. Chapter 6 Tinged Scarlet

Diamond Rose

Chapter 6

Tinged Scarlet

By some miracle. It happened. Somehow, with minimal interaction between the two of them, Lavi and Miku, together had completed the songs. Rosebud was to be released on the 5th of May, 2 weeks away. The gap was, as her producer put it, "time for you to relax and to finish producing that goddamned PV."

Miku raised an eyebrow as she scanned the printout that had been handed to her earlier on, "How come I'm the only one in the commercial?"

"Well, you aren't actually."

"Oh. They're making two separate ones."

"That's right."

Miku just retreated to the room she had dumped her bag in and sat, pulling her fuax-fur trimmed jacket around her. It seemed that in every building she went to these days was air-conditioned. At a temperature that was way too low. She absent-mindedly pulled on the ends of her hair. It seemed so boring to her sometimes, but she liked it. It felt like the old days. When it was a natural colour. She smiled a little to herself as she recalled a particular memory. She wasn't sure how long ago it was. Probably when she was four years old.

"_Miku-chan!" _

_She looked up, short black hair swinging around. Tomoko tried hard to stay at home more, but she was popular, and work required so much of her time. "Okaa-san?"_

_She had laughed, tugging gently at some of her daughter's hair, "I love Miku's hair! It's so pretty!"_

"_But okaa-san's hair is really bright!"_

_Tomoko had twisted some of her own light brown hair around her fingers, smiling at it. It was such a sad smile, but Miku hadn't noticed back then. The four-year-old's simple comment was right. Tomoko was of Japanese-English descent and she had inherited her mother's looks. The light brown hair she had contained many different shades, the lightest being faint streaks of blonde. "But I like Miku's better."_

"_Really?"_

"_Yes."_

_Miku couldn't understand why.__ "Why?"_

_Tomoko had smiled, something that most photographers had only ever captured twice – once for her debut album and the second time when she was announcing a temporary hiatus. "Because your hair reminds me of you father. But I like how I can see myself in Miku as well."_

She blinked at the sound of something being dropped onto the ground - a soft thump. And she found herself looking at Lavi. "Hi."

He smiled at her, friendly like he had always been to her, "Hey. Did I disturb you?"

_What he really means is "were you sleeping?"_ Miku shook her head, "Nah." She then raised an eyebrow, looking at the jacket he just picked up, "How come you dropped that?"

Lavi laughed as he flopped down onto the couch beside her, "I'm clumsy sometimes." Fortunately for Lavi, she didn't know that in truth. He had dropped the jacket because he hadn't been expecting to see her there as his usual expectations for female entertainers did not include sleeping on a couch while waiting to be called upon. "Anyway, because it looks like a great time to ask-"

Miku had her head in her hands, sensing something something distasteful coming her way. "Oh great, what now."

He frowned at her, "C'mon, you haven't even heard my suggestions yet."

She was grinning into her hands now; face still covered. Her tone of voice had was somewhat more amused now. "When did I say I thought your suggestions were at all good?"

Lavi sighed, "You know, through out this entire recording process, we've hardly interacted."

She looked up at him, blinking, "And?"

"Maybe I'm not incredibly used to Japan and the music business, but it's gonna look weird when people find out we aren't even friends."

Miku sat up properly after he said this. He was right. It was a big problem but only in relation to her job. However, if he were to be talking about their personal lives, Miku didn't want much to do with him anymore - at least that was what she told herself. "Agreed. What should we do about it?" Clearly, she had not even begun to consider the most obvious answer to the question. However, Lavi had already prepared the answer and had actually made arrangements beforehand despite common belief.

"Last minute socializing." He proclaimed with a victorious tone, and grabbed her hand, stood, and dragged her out of the building, into a taxi and then to a restaurant.

"YOU FREAKING DUMBASS!" She screamed that once they were inside. There weren't many people around, so not a lot of people heard. Only she still felt a little guilty. "Why a restaurant? And that was uncalled for! Dragging me out without letting me disagree!" She took a breath before continuing but the volume lowered slightly, "Aren't they worried? This is diverting off the timetable we were given -"

Lavi didn't seem to mind her complaints as he led the her to the table they had been given. He sat, gesturing for her to sit, and she did, albeit somewhat grdgingly. Lavi opened the menu resting in front of him, scanning it's contents as he spoke, at a much lower volume than she had previously been speaking, "Miku, last minute socialising, we both have interviews tomorrow. _Together_. I got permission, they were really upset with me but I was able to express the importance of this." He was being surprisingly reasonable and Miku couldn't understand that this was a part of the Lavi she had met not too long ago. "Maybe our personal relationships aren't best. Yes, I am admitting that." He looked annoyed now. Miku was reeling, confused. He was stating everything she had previously believed only she herself was largely aware of. "But both our careers are dependant on this. I would have been freaking perfectly fine with modelling clothing labels and what not back in Britain." He paused, eyes looking away from her for a moment. "But I'm not."

Miku frowned. "What made you change then?"

He dropped the menu on the table, a smile miraculously appearing on his handsome features, "Well, I met this actress, she was on holiday and she had begged to be allowed into the Ralph Lauren photoshoot I was working at." He looked as though there was something to add but stopped himself.

Miku nodded once, "Right, and?"

"She started talking in Japanese to her manager, and I, being particularly gifted with-"

"Cut the crap and get to the point."

Lavi just smirked and kept going as if she had never spoken, "Okay. Anyway, she started ranting about how she was probably going to try modelling. One thing went to another, and she suggested I try out working in Japan."

Miku shrugged her jacket off her shoulders as she replied, "What was her name?" She had a feeling that she knew exactly who this actress was.

"Sorane."

"Last name?" But there wasn't any point in asking, she only knew of one actress who had that name.

"Takashi."

Miku sucked in a breath. _Oh, she was so dead._

Lavi looked confused, "Is there a problem."

Miku faked a smile, "Nope, none at all." She was aware of how obviously artificial this smile was.

Lavi chose to ignore that, "Okay, we've got to a good start." Cheerfully he continued to speak, "So, how about you? How'd you get to where you are now?"

Now this was a topic Miku liked. Or at least, felt mildly comfortable with. But she had to choose her words carefully to answer his question. Too much information would lead to very awkward questions. "Just a lot of perseverance along with help from my manager." Now, she was actually smiling. "I owe a lot to my friends too." Then her expression drifted off as she considered Sorane. Her best friend was well … completely snowed underneath her own career. It was one movie to the next and then to a drama, then to a talk show.

"Something goes wrong in that category, eh?"

She shook her head. Suddenly furious with herself, how could she be so careless to speak of that? On top of that - show that facial expression. "No. Nothing's wrong. It's just always been that way."

Lavi rested his head on one hand. That green eye that wasn't covered with his hair was looking at her. It seemed to be impossible to avoid its gaze. "Then something's been wrong for a long time, right?"

She felt a wave of relief pass over her as the waiter came to their table. Anything to avoid that topic. She had avoided it for so long. So long she could hardly recall the last time she had thought about it. Which was a big achievement in her eyes.

Not too far away, Sorane was standing in her apartment, listening to her elder sister and mother argue. It happened every day. Clothes, expenses, music, food … It wasn't that Sorane didn't care about those things. She did care. Just less than the other female members of her family. But now wasn't the right time to be considering those things. She closed the door, wondering how long it would take for them to stop. It was like a routine, only they got better at it every day. And every day, she would close the door and just wonder if her acting was good enough. Sorane only lived in the real world half-heartedly, and she greatly preferred the artificial, only-behind-camera world.

Because it wasn't real.

And therefore, you couldn't get hurt.

_The real world__,_

_Brings many things,_

_The false one,_

_Brings just as many,_

_And is so much safer_


	7. Chapter 7 Sound of the Sky

Diamond Rose

Chapter 7

Sound of the Sky

"Haruka-kun-!"

"Go away!"

"Please! Listen to me!" Inwardly, Sorane wondered why they had to choose such corny lines. She could just imagine those critical blog posts. She also winced inwardly when her voice came out so high-pitched. But the producer obviously found it fine because they just kept on filming. There was so much to complain about. The stupid-looking school uniform was one thing. Sure, the sailor girl style wasn't that bad, but it was cold, because they were having his dude on a ladder spray water from a hose up into the air, creating the image of rain. _Which is pretty freaking real because it's WATER and it's making me shiver._

"What is there to listen to?"

Sorane enforced her current expression as she repeated the lines she had memorized not too long ago, "I know what I did was wrong – I don't think you will forgive me-"

He cut in at the exactly right moment, "So why're you wasting your time?"

She bit her lip, aware that there was probably a camera shooting a close-up right now, "I want to try … Apologising is all I can do. And I have to do it!" She injected more force into the last line, hoping for decent results.

Sorane finished work, and was shrugging on a jacket. She was aware that the limousine outside was for her, but she didn't want to go home just yet… Surely the chauffeur was nice enough. "Are you driving me straight back?"

He nodded, "Yes, your mother ordered-"

Sorane put on her best puppy dog face. Surely it would work on a chauffer. "I need to run an errand, please take me to Flight Records."

He fell for it, and nodded.

Sorane smirked as she turned away, "Thanks so much." She stepped out as soon as they stopped, flashing a wide smile at the chauffer, "Couldn't thank you enough!" And ditching her bag in the limousine, she pulled on a pair of leather gloves, and gathered up all she needed in a small purse. "Better." She nodded to herself. And she was running up the stairs the next moment.

She was stopped at the front desk, as expected, and after many attempts, she was told to wait. They probably didn't send her away immediately because it's been on a lot of shows and advertisements. Eventually, the elevator pinged open, revealing a tired-looking Allen clutching a bag that was probably filled with music sheets, pens, and food. Something would be wrong if there was no food. He blinked, surprised. "Sorane, what are you doing here?"

Sorane smiled up at him, clearly delighted, "I have something to say."

Allen frowned, "Here?" He glanced around, still not out of the elevator.

Sorane noticed a flaw in her "plan". "Um … well, better not." She grabbed his hand, and ignoring his protests, dragged him out of the building, "We should go somewhere quieter." Although she acted so calm, inside, she was feeling nervous. How was he going to react? What would he say? What will happen to their friendship? It was like she was putting everything she ever valued (that wasn't clothes and jewellery) on the line. And of course, her mother wouldn't approve. _She's probably going to say stuff like "he's not part of your personal life! Even if you used to be friends with him!" But I don't think that's true … he's definitely part of my personal life. He's my friend._ But a part of her shook her head, _he's not a friend anymore. As soon as you realised, he wasn't a friend._

Miku splashed the cold water over her face. Sure, her manager was going to pounce on her as soon as she left the bathroom, as would Lenalee, but who would react differently, and probably produce a towel out of thin air. She looked up at the mirror, blinking her eyes wide open. Water droplets hung on the ends of her eyelashes, the mascara that had been applied there was largely gone, but some more water would remove it completely. The eye shadow was largely gone, fortunately. She sighed and bent down once more, turning the tap on.

She did not hate makeup, but she didn't openly accept it either. It was just that you applied it on your face.

"_Eh? Otou-san and Ayu-kun came?" She was standing there, running a comb through her tangled and messy hair. There was a mass of bobby pins __on the table she was standing in front of; obviously, hair was tricky to deal with sometimes. _

_Sorane nodded, "They asked me to see you."_

_Miku nodded, shrugging on a light jacket as she left. She walked outside and then stopped, there, in front of here, were two people who she least expected in her life. "Otou-san … Ayumu." Her voice expressed all her shock, suddenly she felt shaky. This didn't even happen to her when she did live performances, why was she feeling this way?_

_Her father was the one who spoke first, "Miku, I saw the performance."_

_She flinched when he said that, and she suddenly felt extremely nervous. "And …"_

_He placed a hand on her shoulder, "I'm proud of you, really, but you have to realise…" Hayate seemed to have difficulty getting the words out, as though he was remembering something from long ago, "It's not just fun and games out there." _

_Miku sucked in a breath as she managed a weak smile, "I won't be like that, Otou-san." She then turned to Ayumu, who was pretty much hiding behind his father, blue eyes glued to his sister he hadn't seen in so long. She bent down slightly, clearly there was a lot of growing up that she had missed out on seeingt, and suddenly she felt sad. A guilty weight had been placed on her in a blink of an eye, "Hi Ayu." _

_They hadn't exchanged a single word for a while, so there was much uncertainty hanging in between the two siblings. __And as if my magic, he grinned back, and ran forward to hug her. She returned the hug, laughing with relief. Ayumu too, was smiling, "Onee-chan, you shouldn't wear that on your face."_

_And silently she had agreed._

_Why would you want to __put chemicals over your joyous emotions?_

Sorane breathed out deeply when she, still holding on Allen's hand stopped in the middle of a park. It was getting late, the sky purpling and the sun no longer high in the sky, but rather falling below the cityscape. She turned around to face Allen. When had he been so tall? Or she was just the shorter one now. His expression was still a slightly confused one, but it was beginning to fade away as he got more used to his surroundings. Sorane dropped the grip on his hand, taking deep breaths. Why was her heart pounding so fast?

_Maybe because this is real._

_Sorane, at eight years old, was a child actress. Her mother was married to a director, and used to be a model and actress. She already knew how to curl her own hair, memorise lines, dance ballet and cry at will. And the thing was, she was fine with it. Because, she was always aware that the life she led behind the camera wasn't real, and thus, she liked it. Because it was safe. Everything was fake and there was nothing to be afraid of. _

"_Onee-san." She placed a whiny tone in her voice._

"_What is it?"_

"_I want rabbit apples." She smiled up at the elder actress. _

_As directed, she felt the hand ruffle her hair slighty. "Okaa-san will make them when she comes back."_

_Sorane rested her head on the table, cushioned with her hands, hoping that the effect desired had been performed correctly. She felt the hand on her head again, and then the yelling of "cut!" She sat up again almost instantly, and sprinted out of the set, heading for the table where her mother sat. "Okaa-san, did I do good?"_

_Her mother nodded, smiling at her daughter, but somehow, Sorane felt that it was fake. Was her mother concerned about what people thought of her? Or was it that she didn't want to scold her openly about whatever wrongs she did. Because the green-brown eyes that she had inherited seemed to be speaking of those things. _

_It was inevitable that she would grow to adore the world of bright lights and cameras. __Her family was one filled with love, and yet it was so difficult to spend time with one another. It didn't make sense to her. So she just found a different world, where families could be tight-knit, or torn apart, and in the end of the day, nothing had happened. On her ninth birthday, she had escaped reality, and celebrated her birthday by acting. It wasn't a difficult choice for her. She liked this false world, regardless of the consequences in the long run._

And now, Sorane was finally taking a step in the real world. She looked up at Allen and forced the words out. "I like you." And with that stumbled beginning, she suddenly started stuttering, "I-I mean, well, I do like you – since – I don't know – um, like isn't really a-a good word-". She was quickly silenced with the most unexpected of things.

Allen hugging her. She felt so safe all of a sudden, his arms around her; he didn't do anything else, just holding her. A girl who has been running from reality for too long. Allen then started laughing a little before he stopped and spoke to her. "Sora-chan, how long have you been shoving those feelings down?" His voice was tinged with awkwardness, yet amazingly comforting, and if she was to sneak a glance upwards, Sorane believed that he'd have something of a blush on his cheeks.

But she kept her head at his shoulder as tears began to fall. "I don't know." And this time, the tears that she had allowed to fall were not a result of her command, but a result of finally getting out her pure, honest feelings.

_The sky pulls many looks,_

_Cloudy moody emotions,_

_Rainy sad feelings,_

_And stormy, angry tantrums,_

_But the sky is most beautiful,_

_Free of clouds,_

_Pure blue._

**A/N – this is one of the worst chapters I can possibly write (character and plot-wise). ****Mainly because I cannot write Allen … shameful.**


	8. Chapter 8 Sleeping Roses

Diamond Rose

Chapter 8

Sleeping Roses

Miku was used to over-confident Lavi, flirtatious Lavi and generally up-himself Lavi. But what she wasn't used to was genuinely happy Lavi or tired Lavi. Today, it was tired Lavi.

The singer dropped her backpack on the leather couch, frowning as she studied his sleeping face. The frown did not portray strong dislike but rather slight disbelief. She had never seen him with sleeping, let alone not moving around. _This is quite special._ She glanced around once, and smirking, pulled out her phone from her pant pocket and quickly snapped a photo. Miku winced at the sound, and quickly snapped the phone shut, and stuffed it into her pocket again. Anybody walking in at that moment would have found her looking pretty suspicious. A moment later, Lenalee walked in to find Miku clumsily hiding her previous guilty expression.

"Hi Miku-" The Chinese stylist broke off when her eyes fell on Lavi. Immediately she corrected her voice, realising that she may have been too loud moments earlier. "Aren't you a bit early?"

Miku shrugged as she pulled out a crumpled piece of paper with a timetable printed on it. Under normal circumstances she would have kept something so important in decent condition, but she had been in a rush this morning. She opened it, studying the contents before handing them over to her favourite stylist. "It says I have to be here by ten." She clearly didn't give a damn about Lavi's precious sleep, voice at normal speaking volume.

Lenalee sighed as she looked at the printout. She turned, gesturing for Miku to follow, "It looks like some of us may have been misinformed." Her eyes weren't at all focused on what was going on around her, and yet she had on difficulty finding her way to the walk-in closet. "It doesn't matter, you're here, and I have to dress you." She stood in front of the door, currently too preoccupied with thinking to bother opening the door. She tabbed the wrinkled sheet of paper, "Eleven-fifteen, indoor shoot." She shook her head, which seemed to accentuate the fact that her hair was getting long and keeping it in pigtails did little to alter its length.

They entered, Lenalee almost pouncing on clothes that hung neatly on hangers. "Which one…which one?" She spoke to largely herself, but also appeared to be addressing the singer. She pulled out a few, inspecting with a critical eye, and yet she returned some even though when she approved the design. "Why don't they ever stock the way I want them to?" Lenalee was moaning as she pulled out a shirt and switched it for a pleated mini skirt.

Miku just stood by the doorway, feeling a little out of place as her stylist ran around the room. She herself, was not at all accomplished in the field of clothing and whatever else a stylist was to deal with. She was taught to mainly sing, dance and smile to the cameras. And to speak English. Why on earth she had spent so much time on it before escaped her. She didn't use the language much now. _But still, it's useful. Who knows when they want you to do some random English version or whatever._

Moments later, she was whisked out the door by Lenalee, who had gathered a bundle of clothing at a very impressive speed.

Miku was freaking out. That was the best way to describe her at this moment. Maybe she was dressed brilliantly, with a white crop jacket, floaty black knee-length dress and black heels. Lenalee had insisted on makeup, seeing that this was a very important interview, and had added a faint pink blush to her cheeks, along with a minimal amount of blue eye shadow and eye liner. The lipstick was not very red, it was more on the pink side. Even dressed so well, she was still nervous. "I don't think I can go out."

Lavi sighed, walking up to Miku seemed much too confident. The black tux worked well, as did the dappled white and black scarf around his neck. He flashed a wide grin at her, "We're gonna be fine." He draped an arm around her shoulders and Miku winced immediately – as though some crazy electric shock had just occurred.

She was forcing words out of her mouth, this extra pressure combined with her already unsteady nerves was not going to produce good things. "Please take your arm off me."

Too bad there wasn't anybody nearby, in other words, there was nothing stopping Lavi from doing whatever he really wished to do. Which in this instance, was to lean down and kiss her. Even better for him, was that her head was already tilted towards him when she had been demanding that he let go of her.

It was happening again. But this time, she did not push away. She did not try, instead, she just accepted that kiss. She didn't think – how could you possibly think? She felt his hands – when had they been this cold? –gently tilt her face upwards a little more. But that was all. Miku could not help realising as he ended the kiss, moving away, that he seemed to be holding himself back.

Lavi was looking away, determined not to let himself run wild, destroying the currently rickety relationship he had with Miku. He would have liked to continue his old life. That life of a new girl every week or month, frequent photo shoots and night clubs. But he had slowly come to realise that the life Miku had was something he wanted to be a part of as well. They didn't spend a lot of time together but he could see that she was happy. She joked and laughed with Allen, she spoke with that stylist of hers frequently. And when she sang it was like she was a different person. Her voice was not perfect nor did she have a perfect memory. But she loved singing. Music was her life and he was going to do all he could to stay a part of her world. Not just because he loved her – but also because this new world that she had introduced to him was just too good to lose.

"So, the question that's on everybody's mind – are you two dating?"

Miku noted how the question was phrased – aimed at both of them at the same time. She answered, seeing as Lavi seemed pretty happy to answer the question, meaning that nothing good was going to come out of it if she let him. "I guess that's a question you must ask. Truthfully, we are not dating." She paused allowing the journalist to nod, gesturing for her to continue but was cut off by Lavi.

"But of course, just because we aren't right now doesn't mean that we won't in the future." Lavi had spoken in a completely genuine tone of voice, and he said it so innocently, that Miku couldn't help wishing that it would come true.

She smiled to hide whatever it was feeling from the strangers around and looked up at the ceiling, relaxing. _It's kind of stupid. I used to love this guy. But what is he now?_ She sneakily cast him a look, studying his features. _I don't know. Maybe he's not as bad as I thought._

"That's great! Thank you, and I'm sure readers would like to know – what are your thoughts on the song?"

Now this was a question she had to answer. Miku was grinning as she answered, "Rosebud, for me, is a really deep song. I think everybody will interpret it as a love song – it is – but it's also about starting again, or beginning." She paused for a moment, before launching into a more extended answer, "I hope that people will listen to Rosebud and feel a bit hopeful or encouraged about whatever is happening to them in life. I guess life is like a rosebud. You have this tiny thing that might grow to become something wonderful, and it's up to us to nurture it so it blooms."

"My, such a deep answer, tell me, did you have a hand with the lyrics, because by my information, they were written by Walker-san –"

Lavi cut in, seemingly unconcerned about that display of disregard for manners, "Walker-san was the one who wrote the lyrics and composed the music. We just give ideas and tell him the direction we would prefer to take."

"I see, and finally, we'd like to know, do you have any plans for the next release? Anything? A clue?"

Miku grinned as she answered, "Well, everything's moving along pretty slowly and there's nothing definite. But hopefully you will hear from us with a new single or even an album soon." She was pulling off the cute-innocent look quite well. "I myself am looking forward to it. Maybe more than everyone else."

Ayumu frowned, standing from his seat at the dinner table. _Weird, onee-chan's already home, and otou-san said he wasn't going to make it home before eleven today. _He glanced at the analogue clock, there was more than two hours to go, so could it possibly be? The thirteen-year-old was nearly at the door when he heard his sister steamrolling down the stairs and reaching it first. The siblings were at the door together when Sorane entered, clapping her hands gleefully.

"Hi, Miku! Ayu-kun!"

Miku was clearly irritated, "You text me out of the blue and the next moment you're on my doorstep disturbing my brother's studying!" She shot a good-natured order at her younger brother, "Go study," before turning back to her friend. "So what's all this about?"

Sorane paused, studying the lingering Ayumu for a moment before answering, "Try guessing."

Miku rolled her eyes, "Oh, you an Allen finally hooked up." She had meant it as a joke but reality was going to jump out at her right then.

The actress blinked, "Um, that's actually true."

"Wha- WHAT?" Miku's voice was beginning to escalate every single time she opened her mouth.

"That's right."

And not quite keeping her emotions in check, Miku slammed the door in her friend's face. Ayumu was staring at her, one eyebrow raised, "Um … you know, you should have some manners."

Miku nodded, quickly opening the door and stepping out to face her friend. "Uh, congrats, I guess…"

Sorane shrugged, "You don't have to compliment me." But the look in her eyes was something Miku didn't see. Disappointment, annoyance, tolerance. Brewed together with pride and some strange contortion of greed. But overall, it was pretty easy to see the message being conveyed.

_Past loves,_

_Can linger,_

_Or disappear,_

_But the ones that linger,_

_Ghostly images in the heart,_

_Tend to hurt more,_


	9. Chapter 9 Wilting Stories

Diamond Rose

Chapter 9

Wilting Stories

Miku stepped through the doors hesitantly – it had been two years since she last stepped foot through the doors. The receptionist looked up, blinking, and called out to her, "Ah, Kawaguchi-san, I haven't seen you in a while!"

The receptionist was a cheerful woman, and worked part time as a choreographer. Although everybody called her by last name, she consistently reminded people to call her "Junko", Miku had never done so, perhaps now was a good time to start. "Yes, Junko, I'm visiting – I have a day off."

Junko smiled brightly, surprisingly pretty behind the glasses and messy short hair. "I see, are you here for any specific reason?"

"Well," she couldn't see why she was telling Junko but then again, why not? "I thought that Sorane would be here – I haven't talked to her in a while."

Junko nodded as she began tapping on the keyboard, bringing out what looked like a timetable, "Sorane is still taking lessons here, she should be …" She tapped a button, pulling the contents off the screen before turning back to Miku, "She is probably in the library, but it's wise to check in the main language classroom. But then again, she has always been one to skip the boring lessons."

She nodded, "Awesome, thank you." Miku flashed a grin, heading for the elevators, absent-mindedly adjusting her denim jacket.

* * *

Lavi was scowling down at the phone. "I am so immensely stupid." He was standing in the middle of a street, not quite sure where he was, being recognised by fans from every direction and he didn't know who exactly to call to get him out of the situation. "Hm … my manager's useless, so he won't do …" He scrolled down the contacts list, finding nothing useful.

"Oi! Lavi!"

The redhead linked. He knew that voice.

"Are you stupid? Soon you're going to get mobbed, you know!"

He did know that voice. Grinning, he addressed the one who had just insulted him, "Nice to see you here, Allen."

Allen didn't look very happy as he pointed to the car he had just exited from, "Get in."

Lavi of course, was quite happy to do so. He slid in, studying the interior. It was actually quite luxurious – and he was positive that the icebox was filled with a variety of items that Allen wouldn't consume-

"Want one?" Allen was holding out an ice cream cone.

Lavi couldn't help noticing the absurdity of the situation, "Uh … no thanks."

* * *

Sorane loved her mother's talent agency. Not because of the lessons – she liked them but they had blurred into routine, training she had to undergo. She liked the talent agency because it was spacious. There were five balconies and the rooftop. There were twenty-six dance halls, ten recording studios, and nine floors worth of dorm rooms. Sorane's favourite spot was everywhere. Today she was passing time by leaning against the railings on the roof, watching the flow of traffic below her. When the door banged open, she hadn't been expecting Miku. "Wha -what are you doing here?"

Miku was smiling and at the same time shivering – it was cold. "Am I that unwelcome here?" The hurt tone was teasing, fake and was performed transparently.

Sorane shook her head, turning back to face the view of the city, "I thought you had work."

The reply was swift, "I don't have work all the time."

An uncomfortable silence settled, and Miku felt that something was wrong. _How am I to find out?_ Never being the best at these things, she just started talking. "I saw your drama."

The reaction she received was unexpected, "You only watch it now?" Those words were like poison, infecting the mild mood, turning it sour. "Were you so obsessed with your own career that you forgot about everyone around you?"

Miku stayed rooted to the spot, not talking, not moving.

The actress went on – there was a lot to get off her chest. "Allen talks about you a lot. Even Lenalee gets worried. They always say you look stressed – you work too hard -" Finally she turned, facing her friend, "You know what gets to me most?" There was barely a pause before she launched into her next point, "You don't realise that you are affecting everyone around you!"

Miku recoiled at that but was back moments later, encouraging the stormy atmosphere, "Oh, I'm the only one at fault? Have a look at yourself! You're scared! You criticise me when I do something wrong only in reality – you've got faults too! Have a good look at yourself!" she wanted to leave immediately, and she got her wish, leaving the building as fast as she could. This place she had once called home – where she learnt how to sing, how to dance, how to express her feelings. It was so cold now.

* * *

Lenalee yawned suddenly, sitting outside a café. It wasn't usually that she was tired or showed signs of exhaustion – she didn't even consider herself tired today. About everyone who worked with Miku and Lavi had a day off and here she was, reading a magazine, sipping a cappuccino … when she looked up and happened to see her client pass. The Chinese stylist stood immediately, surprised by Miku's sudden appearance, "Miku-"

The girl in question was panting and although she was desperately hiding it – you could see tears. "Lenalee – um –" She was struggling to find something to say.

Lenalee made several swift observations about Miku. Her hair was messy, crying pretty badly, and one knee of her black jeans looked a bit scuffed. She sighed, leading Miku to her table and forcing her to sit. Straight forward as always, she got to the point as soon as her mouth opened, "You've been crying."

And Miku could see how utterly pointless it was to deny the fact. "Yeah." Her blue eyes held nothing but negative feelings – rejection, sorrow, disappointment. "I did something really stupid today."

"What went wrong?"

Miku heaved a huge sigh, crossing her arms on the table and resting her chin on them, "Too much."

"Do you feel like talking about it?" She was stirring her diminished drink now.

"No."

Unexpectedly, the stylist just laughed, looking straight at Miku as she spoke, "I trust you can sort it out yourself then."

Miku couldn't understand exactly what Lenalee was talking about. "Why are you so concerned anyway?"

"Ah. You are sharp." She turned to the side, rummaging for something in the bag she had unceremoniously dropped on the floor some time ago. A minute later, Lenalee had slapped a magazine with several photos jammed in between the pages. It may have looked pretty innocent to the average passer-by but Miku had a bad feeling as it was passed to her. "Your manager, has once again, without consulting you, gone off and accepted another job for you."

She nearly dropped the magazine when she opened it. A fashion magazine. "Oh. My. God."

Lenalee just maintained her pleasant expression.

"She can't be serious."

"Mhmm."

"They want me to model clothes."

"Mhmm."

"And that's definitely not the end of it."

"It most certainly isn't." Lenalee had slammed the thick planner she always had with her on the table now, "I'm in charge of the design – clothes, hair, makeup, theme, lighting – EVERYTHING."

Miku sighed, closing the magazine and passing it back to her stylist, "So in the end, it's both of us that has troubles."

"You could say that. But in the end, we're busy. That's all it comes down to." She was flicking through pages now, occasionally stopping to highlight a point or two as she spoke, "Of course, I shouldn't keep you here. You have a day off. I technically, don't."

She considered the suggestion, it wasn't a bad one, going off and wandering, doing whatever she liked to do in the day. It wasn't like anybody was going to find her doing anything bad. And yet, there was nothing Miku wanted to do. Ayumu was at school, Sorane wasn't talking to her, there was no point in communicating with Lavi, and Allen, like Lenalee was probably busy. "I haven't got anything else to do, though." Besides, she liked Lenalee's company.

"Well, let's talk and try to make this shoot easier for you, okay?"

"I haven't got a better way to waste my time.

"That's the spirit."

* * *

"What is it?"

"Okaa-san, I want-"

"Sorane. This had better not be one of those-"

For the first time, Sorane cut off her mother, "Get me into the next issue of Pink Diamond."

The pause dragged on for what appeared to be infinity. "Sorane. You are not a model. You are an actress. I raised you to be an actress. Japan knows you as an actress. You are not a model." There was a sense of finality to her words, hinting that she did not wish to hear of it again.

And for the first time, Sorane protested, "What, I'm not allowed to try new things? What if I'm good – what if-"

"What on earth has gotten into you?"

More silence before the actress in question finally spoke, "Why am I less successful than Miku?"

"You are not. That girl is talented in her field – you are in yours."

"Then why is it that people know her name and not mine?"

"I thought I explained it to you."

"I know. I don't believe in it."

"Sorane, in essence, you will be famous for who you pretend to be and nothing more. I knew from the very beginning that you would not be suited for another area of entertainment."

"Prove it."

"The sky uses the beauty of those around it the look beautiful. The sky is mute, using the storms of others to portray its emotions. Sorane, I have never had high expectations for you."

_The stone had dropped,_

_Falling deep,_

_Never to rise,_

_Spreading ripples across the lake,_

_As the twisted road,_

_Begins to climb a mountain..._

**A/N - I realise that Lavi and Allen's little section is absolutely POINTLESS - apart from bring some random comedy into the chapter. This chapter marks the point where Miku and Sorane's friendship is no more. **


	10. Chapter 10 Sharp Thorny Games

Diamond Rose

Chapter 10

Sharp Thorny Games

Lavi had not expected to be returning to his old job so soon. Not only was he surprised, but he found it odd to see that Miku was merely studying the new manicure she had received while they discussed it. There was no sign of shock or even the minimal amount of surprise on her face. Instead, once the most important points were discussed, she stood, ignoring the mutinous looks on many of the officials' faces, and left the room. Lavi, seeing as there was little point in him staying now, stood and left – the gazes were turning into poisonous glares now.

To his surprise, Miku was just leaning against the wall outside. She looked up at him when he approached, "Hey." No annoyed looks, no pissed-off tone. Just a simple, everyday greeting.

And naturally, he would have to return the gesture, "Hi. Why'd you skip out like that?"

Now she was frowning, "It's not like they told you to come and get me so why should you care?" she fingered the lace cuffs on her floral-printed jacket as she spoke.

Lavi couldn't help laughing – a large amount of the stress that had been building over several days was suddenly being released.

Miku was staring at him, "Oi. You're disturbing them."

He stopped, hand clamped over his mouth. "It feels good. Laughing."

"There was nothing funny about what I said."

"When did I need a reason for everything I did?"

She didn't have an answer for his question. She kept her head bent, staring at the ground as she thought. _Why can't I carry out a normal conversation with him?_ The questions kept coming – as though she was no longer in charge of what she thought of. _I have never been able to. Especially when he does those things … But then again, I haven't been fair. He tries to be nice and I …_ Miku realised a new disgust, surprisingly, for herself. _I've been too scared to try. I just barricade him out._ And then the final question crept up on her. _Should I stop?_

Lavi was staring at her. His partner had just lapsed into complete silence, usually, she usually rebutted a taunting question yet she had not. "Miku, are you-" He had even begun to reach for her shoulder, mind beginning to jump to conclusions that she was exhausted from work, worried about something-

"I'm fine." Miku looked up at him as she spoke, blue eyes staring into his green one for the first time in a while.

At the same time, Lavi winced as he recalled, noticed, also for the first time in … he did not know how long, but it certainly had been at least a year, that while she had two good eyes, he did not.

And as though a god the pair didn't believe in had just decided to grant them a miracle, one occurred.

Miku grabbed Lavi's arm, and this time, was the one dragging the other out of the building.

_It's time to face our fears,_

_Time to realise,_

_What's been holding us back,_

_What's been making life,_

_So freaking difficult,_

_It's time,_

_Time to talk,_

_Laugh together,_

_Look each other in the eye._

They stopped on the stairs before Flight Records. Miku dropped Lavi's hand, eyes unconsciously focusing on the ground as she started to talk. "I lied. I'm not fine."

Lavi couldn't help retorting with, "I kind of had the impression that you were lying to me ever since we first met."

Was that a slight giggle? Suddenly, he had the courage to keep speaking, "Hey look, you're laughing now."

Miku summoned barely enough courage to lift her head and look at him properly, "Yeah. Isn't that amazing?" And sure enough, even if she wasn't laughing, there was a smile on her features. Afraid of losing it and chickening out, she started talking, "I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologising?"

"Because all I did since we met was making sure there was a distance."

"What? You think I haven't noticed?" There was a hint of irritation mixed with the slightest of anger creeping into his voice.

"Sorry – but – what do you think-"

"I think that you should cut it out."

Miku nearly started panicking there. "Ok."

"Don't think it's easy."

"I don't think it's easy! It's just that, saying "ok" is really easy! I know I was making stuff really hard for you – it wasn't easy for me either, though!" She was just ranting now, belting out everything in rapid succession before this time they had to talk ran out…

"Look, we'll …" Lavi seemed to have difficulty choosing words, "start over."

"Man, that sounds so cheesy."

"Who cares. It makes sense though."

"Yeah…"

"Please give responses I can properly reply to."

"Ok."

"That is an example of how not to do it."

Miku burst out laughing, in between her gales of laughter she managed a sentence, "I get you, Lavi!"

"I still don't consider that an adequate answer to my request!" He too, was beginning to laugh.

And although it hadn't been that long into their day, it was turning out pretty good. Both Miku and Lavi had no doubt in their minds that they had a good day to look forward to but this expectation was about to be shattered in approximately 4 hours.

* * *

Sorane opened her eyes when she heard the stylist declare her "complete" and the sight that met her in the mirror was exactly what she had been hoping for. Framed by bright lights the girl in the mirror wasn't quite the same as she had always visualised her self as. A slight pink was spread across her cheeks and emerald-green eyeshadow enhanced her pale brown eyes. They had ignored lipstick, deciding on a pink lip gloss. Sorane's brown hair had been curled and arranged around her shoulders. She reached out, touching the surface of the mirror with her fingertips and whispered, "Thank you, Mother."

And as though she had just summoned the devil, the woman in question appeared, gesturing the stylist leave so she and her daughter were left alone in the dressing room. She slid into the chair beside the young actress, brown eyes studying her surroundings with little interest. "Thanking me now?"

Sorane nodded, eyes still on the reflection before her, "Still hate you."

Aimi just smiled, "About time."

Sorane turned to her mother, not understanding. "What did you just say?"

She stood up, ignoring her daughter and quickly strode out of the room as though she had not heard her daughter. As though her daughter was the least of the worries. As though she did not hear Sorane grab nearest object – which happened to be a glass cup – currently being used to store various brushes and combs – and hurled it at the wall.

It smashed, the pieces falling to the floor one by one, then whirring as they spun on the floor, before finally coming to a halt. Sorane stood as the stylist entered, who had frozen, eyes darting from the floor to the actress. Sorane just smiled and started out of the room, "Please do not be alarmed, nothing is wrong." And she wasn't lying. After all, what on earth could go wrong? She would go for the photo shoot, and she would defeat Miku who had long over shadowed her. And even though most of her mind was made up, there was still the little doubter in her that asked the really unstable questions – ones she worked hard to avoid. _Am I going to lose her forever? Will she ever forgive me? Do I even want her to forgive me? What am I doing? Why am I doing this?_ That last question though … she could answer herself. _Because I am not going to stand her taking everything away from me._

And she didn't even stop to consider how irrational that was. That was how far into this stupid game she was. It was too late to turn back.

* * *

Lenalee was suffering an incredibly large headache. Not only had she been informed of the other model only now and as though it wasn't bad enough, her competitor happened to be Kanda. The legendary Kanda Yuu. He was the best stylist in Japan, perhaps not the best in China and Korea, but his reach was already extending a little. It had been 4 months since the Burberry shoot for one of the most famous Cpop stars around, Chloe Xu and still there was still the buzz about that amazing photo shoot. The hair, the make up, the clothes. Almost everything had been perfect. _Too bad Chloe's such an amateur. Smiling a tad too much. But then again, fans loved her for her smile_. The Chinese stylist sighed as she sank into the nearest chair, going over her plans as she waited for her models to arrive. _I am going to have fun with Lavi … from those sample pictures from when he was in Britain, oh, he has talent._ It was proving very difficult to suppress a smile now. _I'll beat that Kanda Yuu to the ground._

_My world's like crystal,_

_Everything's so bright,_

_Glittering here and there,_

_Everything's perfect,_

_It's too bad that,_

_Everything I touch,_

_Tends to fall and shatter …_

**A/N - Surprised? Kanda as a stylist. My friend found this highly amusing xD**


	11. Chapter 11 Snapshots of Time

Diamond Rose

Chapter 11

Snapshots of Time

Lenalee sat up, slapping her alarm clock with a little more force than required. She frowned, brushing a strand of hair out of her face as she read the numbers glowing on the clock's face. 4:08 AM.

She didn't remember setting it to ring at that time but it didn't matter now. She was wide awake and the look of her just-out-of-bed, dishevelled self in the mirror was enough to get her out of bed. She had always been conscious about how she looked. It was never a good first impression to look sloppy.

The Chinese girl jumped when she heard a motorcycle rush past on the street outside. Blinking the remnants of sleep out of her eyes, she turned on the lamp on her bedside table and smiled as the walls had an orange-yellow glow thrown onto them. Lenalee stepped to her wardrobe, sliding the door open to reveal it's designer items. Seeing as the days were getting warmer, she chose a pale blue blouse and a rather special pair of dress pants.

Her brown eyes lingered on the butterfly design on the left pant leg for a moment too long – tempting old memories out.

_Lenalee arrived in Tokyo at the age of 18, under the guidance of her mentor, Kazu Nakajima and the first thing she had done was walk into somebody. __Not only had she tripped over him but she had dropped her carry-on luggage that contained the pair of dress pants she had been planning to embroider a design onto. Perhaps that worry should not have been the first thing on her mind but back then, clothes was the main thing she thought about. "Oh gods-" She had only just realised the horrific reality of what had happened, "I'm so sorry-"_

_She was on her knees beside who was possibly the most gorgeous male specimen of the human race she had ever laid eyes on. Unfortunately, there was an irritated expression on his face. "Don't you watch where you go?"_

_In accented Japanese, she stuttered a reply, "U-Um, I'm sorry." She stood a little shakily and he did at the same time. Gosh that ponytail was distracting._

_As Lenalee admired him, he was picked up the dress pants and was studying the pages of designs that had fluttered out with it. The 18 year-old immediately felt her cheeks go pink. _

_He flicked through the first two pages, blue eyes lingering on each design for several seconds before folding them neatly and replacing them in the bag and handing it to her. Surprisingly, he was smiling, "I suggest the butterfly pattern." And with those five words that made a sentence, he was gone. _

Lenalee couldn't suppress a silly smile. Who knew that was her first meeting with Kanda Yuu. Without any more hesitation, she was dressed and headed down the corridor to her bathroom. It was going to be a good day.

_Take a trip,_

_Stroll down the memory lane,_

_Admire the happy moments,_

_Bask in the sunny days,_

_Do you remember?_

LENALEE LEE

That was what the plaque on the table said. Lenalee turned to Kazu, "Oh my gosh. I've been-"

The red-haired woman nodded, making her chandelier earrings swing in a rather distractive manner. "Yes. Finally, right before Christmas. You're now a fully-employed member of this company. Let this be my gift to me." She took a step towards the door, "Work's over. Let's go and have some fun."

And Lenalee obliged. After all, she had just gotten a job with one of the biggest entertainment companies after almost an entire year of hard work. She was surely entitled to some celebration.

The pair stepped out of the building, waving abnormally cheerful goodbyes to the receptionist. It was snowing outside, cold yes, but it was a beautiful sight.

Kazu sighed, her breath condensing before disappearing into the air, "Such a beautiful day. Those snobs working with Miyako Hidaka shouldn't have scheduled the photoshoot for tomorrow. Such a waste."

Lenalee laughed as they started down the streets, "Well, however shameful, what's done is done. Besides, you aren't in charge."

That sly smile. "I just care for my favourite singer's photo shoots." The thirty-three year-old stopped next to a shop window. There were plenty of those littered around – all over-decorated for Christmas. But what had made her stop-? "Lenalee."

"Yes?"

"I have the perfect Christmas gift for you. Early once again. But seeing that I'm leaving for Kyoto tomorrow …" Without hesitation, she started into the store, at the same time motioning for the Chinese girl to wait outside.

And she did, breathing out clouds of warm breath as she waited for Kazu to emerge. Lenalee was facing away from the shop window, wanting to surprise herself. Whatever gift her mentor wished to buy for her – she did not want to see until it was given to her. And thus, she hadn't noticed Kazu grin inside and snap a picture before turning and fussing over the wrapping. Of course, it wasn't natural for one to use the new camera and then have it wrapped but Kazu's persuasive skills were good enough to have the shop assistant agree half-heartedly.

The door slid open a few moments later to reveal Kazu carrying a box. White snowflakes of different sizes dotted the black outside of the bow and the white ribbon held the lid in place. The box was slid into Lenalee's hands along with a message. "Don't open it until 10:20 on Christmas morning."

Looking up, puzzled, Lenalee questioned her mentor, "Why?"

"Don't ask why. Just do it."

"Okay."

The next morning, Lenalee turned on her laptop to find an email waiting for her. And seeing the sender, she had no hesitation when clicking the message to open it.

SUBJECT: Cya

SENDER: Kazu Nakajima

TO: Lenalee

Cya. And Merry Christmas.

I was going to leave it at that.

Only I won't. There's a lot to say and I might as well say it now.

I said I'm leaving for Kyoto. I lied. I'm not going to Kyoto. I'm leaving for the US. I love Japan. You know I do. I wish there was enough time to drag you around Japan – to show you everything I loved. But sometimes, a job offer comes your way and you have to take it.

The time I'm spending there is undecided – but it's definitely over 8 months. Maybe that's the reason why the boss decided to employ you full time – but if you ask me, I say that she should have done it way earlier.

Anyway, hopefully I'll be back soon. In the meantime, don't soil my reputation. Do your best!

And go to the park near your apartment today – be there at 10:15am. Take my gift with you. If I find out that you didn't go, I'll get mad. Stay there until somebody talks to you. Remember. Open the gift at 10:20, of any time around that really. And wear those personalized dress pants I happen to know you have.

Merry Christmas.

Cya.

-Kaz.

Lenalee blinked as her eyes roamed to the time in the corner of her laptop screen. It winked 10:05 AM at her. She slammed the laptop shut and ran to her wardrobe. She pulled the door open, selecting a few items – the dress pants, a deep purple turtleneck and midnight blue down jacket. She ran out of her apartment after pulling on a pair of sneakers. It was cold. But she didn't care. If Kazu told her to go somewhere and meet someone, she would go.

That was how much Lenalee owed Kazu.

* * *

SUBJECT: Pink Diamond

SENDER: Kazu Nakajima

To: Lenalee

Hey~

What's this I heard about you and Kanda participating in the shoots for Pink Diamond? Last time I checked it was only you organising the Miku & Lavi shoot. Now Kanda's participating with that actress Sorane.

I don't know what you guys spoke about, all I did that day was make sure he talked to you. That's what he wanted.

Anyway, I'll be looking out for how you do. Or send me an email. I heard there's going to be some silly voting thing? Or is that just a rumor?

-Kaz

_My memories,_

_A tangled net of feelings,_

_Moments I will never forget,_

_My favourite times,_

_And the hardest times,_

_Are clearer than the others,_

_Snapshots of time._


	12. Chapter 12 Everyone's Favourite Rose

Diamond Rose

Chapter 12

Everyone's Favourite Rose

_After you spend a lot of time in the world you are comfortable in, there will be a time when you forget what pain is. _

Miku had not known this. Unfortunately, it was going to become painfully obvious in front of the entirety of Japan. Or at least, anybody who got their hands on the Pink Diamond August issue. And she was going to be beating herself up about it. While her father remained frustrated at her and Ayumu avoided her. But oddly enough, what hurt most was not those things. What hurt more was that Sorane had gone out of her way to shame her former best friend.

_But then again, since we are no longer friends and the only thoughts she seems to hold for me is hatred__ and all those other negative ones …_ She sighed, staring up at the ceiling. Maybe her eyes saw but her mind was not focused on the dull image. _What did I ever do to her? _She thought for a while but no answers came. _Okay … what did I not do for her? _Miku still couldn't come up with any answers so she forced a smile when she heard the familiar ringtone – the theme song of Sunflower Kite, a movie Sorane had been in. _I need to change that._ And she picked up the phone without even a glance at the screen for who it was. About everybody was upset at her nowadays, who cared who was going to shout at her next?

"Miku."

Ah. It was Lenalee. "Hi Lenalee." Her voice was flat. Monotonous.

"Your manager told me to tell you that you lost the poll."

"And why am I not surprised?" Some expression seemed to leak back into her voice. That was a good sign.

"But the margin wasn't actually as bad as we expected, you know." Lenalee was using the cross between whiny and serious tone.

"I still lost."

There was a fierce feeling in the stylist's voice now. "It's over! You can't change what has already happened! Just forget it and move on."

_You liar._ Miku thought this as her mouth moved to form words, "Okay. But I bet that the others are not going to let me forget this." She kept thinking, and the guilt kept piling up. _You say to forget and move on when you yourself cannot._

"Those idiots can say whatever they like. The people who actually make your songs happen, the ones that are by your side every day – the ones who are actually your friends. Just care about them."

Miku couldn't help smiling as she heard those words. "You really know how to cheer someone up." And even though those words were so uplifting, they also dragged heavy, painful thoughts to the surface.

"I'm just being reasonable. And besides, I've suffered a lot of disappointments before."

"Hasn't everyone?"

_Miku_

_The first time I heard my mother sing was no doubt when I was a baby. I don't remember much from then. Memories of the warm sunlight on her face and arms paired with the feeling of something light – like a breeze brushing over my skin led me to believe that I had spent quite some time outside. When I was beginning to walk I start getting clearer memories. I remembered __okaa-san's voice, singing a nursery rhyme that her own mother had taught her. _

_At first, I only remembered the first two lines. __When I was four, I recall – extremely vividly, like it was just yesterday – asking her if she remembered singing a song for me when I was young. Okaa-san had smiled at me pulled me into her lap and happily sang the entire song. Sometimes, I still wish that time could have stopped then. So she would keep singing the children's song to me. Over and over. Maybe I didn't wish it back then. But I do now._

_When I turned five, Okaa-san sang "Happy Birthday__" like Otou-san had. Ayu-kun wasn't quite awake, gently napping in Okaa-san's arms. For the rest of the day, Okaa-san only sang "Autumn Leaves". She hummed it while cooking, sang it while hanging clothes outside, and even though I never found out when she did it – there was a studio recording of her singing that song that I kept hearing when the stereo was on. Back then, I had dismissed this as her mere fondness for the song, or perhaps it was good weather to sing the song. Maybe the red leaves weren't established in Tokyo yet … but it was autumn. _

_I feel like crying when I think about it now. Why had I not recognised this love she had for me? Why had I taken her for granted?_

_I guess that when you're young, the world seems perfect. I would give anything to have Okaa-san with me now. What guidance could she give me? I feel pathetic. I don't have answers. _

_Maple leaves as they drift near the bank and away,_

_Weave such beautiful brocades as they go by …_

School was torture. Miku had been able to bear 2 hours worth of the curious glances and tentative questions and finally she skipped. Screw her reputation. It was falling to pieces anyway. She had only made it to the local park before she saw somebody she actually knew. Guess who. Lavi.

He grinned, waving at her lazily. "Hey, I thought you shouldn't be skipping."

Miku was too tired to be mean. "I don't really care anymore. What are you doing here?"

He sank into the swing next to the one she had chosen a few moments ago. "I don't know."

She looked down at the mulch beneath her feet. "It's like everyone feels lost after my failure."

"You weren't that bad, honest. A bit stiff, a lack in technique but that was expected." Surprisingly, the pity in his voice was at a minimum.

"Lavi, I still failed a lot of people."

Those words had a large impact on Lavi. He couldn't remember when Miku had addressed him seriously – in a manner that showed that she didn't hate him or find his presence irritating. And accidental or not, there had undoubtedly been a sense of finality in her statement. For a moment, usually cool and collected Miku seemed defeated. And to Lavi, that was just wrong. "Oi. You sound depressed. You've got to stop that. I thought you were used to disappointments."

"Hmm." She had sat up straight down, fingers twisted around the chains that held the swing in place. "I've never been good at handling them. I should have seen one coming though." There was a return of strength – entirely unexpected, but it was there. "I should stop sulking."

Lavi felt an uncontrolled smile fly to his features, "Ah, that's better. Hey, seeing as you're jigging school and I don't need to go to school … let's go to work." Her had barely finished his sentence when Miku hopped off her seat and clapped her hands twice.

"Good idea. We should make some more progress with what boss wants from us. Besides, I can sing. It's what I was trained to do. " There was a return of strong Miku – the one who was so passionate about singing that there wasn't a lot of room in her mind for anything else.

Lavi couldn't resist teasing, "Oh, and I'm just a tag-along?"

Unfortunately for him, Miku was taking everything that came out of his mouth pretty seriously right now. She set her cool blue eyes on his features as she answered, "That depends."

* * *

Being the in-between person for two people who were almost enemies is a very uncomfortable situation. Unfortunately for Allen, that was the position he was in. Being Sorane's boyfriend, he felt inclined to side with her but common sense stated that the actress was over-reacting. A mountain of recent discoveries and realisations could do that to a person. And then there was the other side – he worked with Miku. And although she didn't have direct power over his job, it wasn't difficult for her to remove him … that is, if she ever got to the point where such a thing would seem necessary. Allen sighed as he leaned back in his chair, black ball-point pen balanced in between teeth, eyes closed, thinking. _Miku is not the type of person who would mindlessly get me fired … but when she's angry … _He didn't want to think about that.

"Allen!"

The composer jolted back into full consciousness as his door was opened, banging against the wall. He blinked once, absorbing the sight before him. Miku was standing in front of his desk, Lavi lagging behind her. It was the first time he had seen them united in one action – that is – barging into his office. "Hi, Miku. You were looking for me?" Allen was already pulling out the several lyrics he had penned.

Miku eyed the sheets of paper, "Well, you seem to understand what I was looking for already."

Lavi hung in the corner, studying one of the photos on Allen's bookshelf. Allen, suspicious, called out to him, "What are you doing? Don't you-"

He was standing next to Miku a second later, "Yes, please continue." The amplified radiant grin wasn't doing much to alter Allen's suspicion.

"Take those sheets and get into the free recording studio. I don't think anybody's scheduled for today."

They were gone so fast that he had barely finished his sentence when his door slammed shut. Allen sighed, a small smile on his face as he stood from his desk and approached the bookshelf. Lifting a small photo frame off, his eyes widened a fraction.

The photo had been taken two years ago – right after Miku's test. Miku was dressed in the memorable costume – perhaps the first time Allen had ever thought of her as more than a good friend. Sorane was standing on Miku's left, the cheerful smile on her face was something Allen hadn't seen in years. And then there he was, on Miku's right, dressed in his usual attire: white formal shirt and black vest. But what bothered him the most was that Lavi had been looking at this picture. Why would Lavi be interested?

_Secrets …_

_Always so delightful,_

_Ever tempting,_

_But knowing them,_

_When you have no right to,_

_Such an act,_

_Should not be forgiven…_


	13. Chapter 13 Haphazard Thorns

Diamond Rose

Chapter 13

Haphazard Thorns

Lavi winced as Miku yelled at him for the thirty-second time. "YOU HAVE TO BE PERFECT! STOP SLACKING!"

"I'm not slacking."

Miku kept glaring at him, "Then why aren't you improving?"

That was a question the entirety of the staff working with the duo has been trying to answer. This time, nobody tried interrupting. They were used to Miku. If she was this into it, there was no stopping her. Just stand back and let the storm rage. But before Miku could rage any further, the door opened.

And the person that stepped in received a glare that would have reduced any normal person to ashes.

"Sorane."

The actress in question smirked in her rival's direction. "Hello. When did you earn the right to address me solely by first name?"

Miku felt inclined to return the insult. "When did _you_ earn the right to barge into my precious schedule?"

The atmosphere in the room was extremely heavy. Allen was nearing the level of stress where he would willingly give anything to get out. Even worse was that Lenalee, back from getting a coffee refill was glaring at him. "Allen, you twerp. Didn't you ever _try_ calming Sorane down?"

Being in the middle really sucked.

Allen shrugged, "It's something that's for them to work out anyway."

Lenalee stared into the cheap brown liquid in the plastic cup she was holding as she answered her co-worker. "I don't know. You can't be sure, can you?" The pigtailed stylist was eying the two girls in turn, as though hoping for some clue to miraculously appear.

The white-haired young man just shrugged again. "Of course I'm not sure. But they used to be best friends. Doesn't that say something already?"

Funnily enough, it was that statement that shut the stylist up. This didn't last long though.

Sorane had entered alone, meaning that she must have ditched whoever was coming with her. That would naturally be her manager. However, as it was Sorane's mother who was her manager, it was difficult for her to always be with her daughter. Besides, Aimi didn't even like her daughter much. And when Aimi found that her daughter's new stylist had some experience in the field, he was assigned to her within minutes. Who was this stylist? Who else but legendary Kanda Yuu, recruited straight back from China.

"Sorane, the next time you run off without my permission, I will use force to stop you."

The actress visibly jumped before turning to face her temporary manager, attempting to regain her composture. "You have no right to order me around like this. Be polite!"

A cold smirk appeared on his handsome features … briefly. "How ironic. I was under the impression that I was the one who was being polite. How could a newbie to the business - who happens to be 4 years younger than me, know things like manners?" A condescending tone had settled in his voice.

Miku swore she was seeing electric bolts fly between the pair. And for some reason, she was looking forward to Sorane's next pathetic remark. There was a certain amount of satisfaction to be gained from watching Kanda berate the actress.

And as hoped, stupid Sorane delivered. "Understand that you only have this job-"

"Oh, that clichéd attack." He leaned down so his eyes were closer to Sorane's providing an excellent view of the barely-concealed anger of his. "Know that I am easily one of the best stylists in Asia. I am aiming for the world right now. This pathetic job … is just amusement."

"Excellent." This word was followed with a slow applause by Lenalee who stepped forward, leaving her cup of coffee on the nearest table. "Excellent." And unexpectedly, she broke out in a friendly smile. "Welcome back to Japan, Kanda-kun."

And to everyone's surprise, his features immediately composed themselves and he took Lenalee's proffered hand and shook. "It has been a while, Lenalee."

The Chinese stylist almost pouted. "A while? Kanda – it's been two years. You always say you've been back but I never see you. You hardly ever send emails. Kazu even asks if we're still on speaking terms. Do you know what I answer?"

"What?" His tone was flat, uncaring.

But Lenalee obviously didn't really care. "I say that we don't talk but we are on speaking terms. Obviously, that can't possibly make much sense."

"It doesn't."

"Care to explain yourself?"

It seems that nothing could stop Kanda's asshole-ish attitude. "I think my high-profile contacts over China and Korea will do most of the explaining."

_That promise,_

_Those words we told each other,_

_That frosty morning,_

_You've taken it seriously,_

_I did too,_

_But not as much as you,_

_I should be happy for you …_

_But I'm not._

"Is he really such an annoying bastard?"

Lenalee sighed as she stirred her hot chocolate listlessly. "I don't believe that he means to be. Sometimes … he is rather cold."

Miku blew a strand of hair out of her face, "He seems hard to get along with."

"He is somebody who has suffered a lot."

Miku felt their surrounding temperature immediately fall a couple of degrees. "Oh …"

Lenalee looked up at the singer, smiling weakly, "Ah, I shouldn't have told you that." She sat up slightly straighter when she noticed somebody approach them, "Ah, hello."

Miku turned in her seat to see Lavi, "Oh, there you are."

Lavi huffed, "How ungrateful. I'm not even late." Despite the displeased tone of voice, there was some affection in his voice – not enough to make Miku notice though.

Shrugging, Miku slid out of her seat, waving once to Lenalee, "Well, I'll be going now."

It always cheered up Lenalee to see her favourite singer smiling. She drank deeply as another familiar figure stepped into the room, earning several searching looks from the other costumers. "Ah, hello. Was there bad traffic?" It was a light-hearted, nonsensical beginning to a conversation.

Kanda shook his head – the ponytail was seriously getting too distracting – and sat down in the seat Miku had vacated moments ago. "I walked here. It is better than turning up later than necessary for the sake of comfort." As he spoke, he waved away a waiter, who would leave the two unlikely friends in peace for the rest of their conversation in the café.

"You are just like I remember."

"You on the other hand, seem a little different."

This comment perked Lenalee's interest, "Is that so? How am I different?"

Kanda paused for a moment, gathering his thoughts. "Looking back, you are less hyperactive than before."

The stylist felt as though a tonne worth of stones had been dropped on her self esteem. Sighing, she looked up at him, "That's it? I was hoping for something more positive, you know."

"I have no reason to please you – besides, isn't it better to know your faults and fix them before you are seriously reprimanded for them?"

Lenalee couldn't hold back a giggle. "I think that you've been spending a little too much time with the singer and actor types."

* * *

Sorane flipped thorugh the script idly. This drama seemed okay … it was interesting – that was true. It was more than those pathetic romantic dramas aimed at teenagers. But what was truly bothering her was how much of the cast had already been chosen. The director had only sent the request 30 minutes ago, along with a copy of the script and cast list. _I don't deny it, this gaijin director is … extremely well organised. _She ran a manicured finger down the list slowly, evaluating every name. Already she had recognised several.

She froze when her finger travelled down to the post-it that had been hastily scrawled on and slapped onto the page. It read quite clearly, _Theme & Insert Songs: LaKu_. The actress blinked twice. There was no need to pinch herself to see if it was a dream. It was most definitely reality. Miku and Lavi had received a job. Most of her despised Miku – the perfect, treasured singer and seiyuu, well recognised by the public for her singing voice and unique messages conveyed in her songs. The miniscule part of her that still loved Miku – the one that played the role of best friend, nagger, supporter, was happy that her "friend" had been accepted for a job and that they would be working together. It seemed that all she was feeling these days was some type of emotional conflict.

_Although I really don't want to,_

_I keep remembering,_

_Our fun times together,_

_Those times when we cried together,_

_Holding each other for support,_

_Now that I've made sure,_

_That we can no longer do that,_

_I feel that something's missing,_

_I don't want to admit it,_

_But maybe,_

_Maybe,_

_I miss you…_


	14. Chapter 14 Intoxicating Scents

Diamond Rose

Chapter 14

Intoxicating Scents

_It was a warm afternoon. The sun wasn't really bright and there were a lot of clouds in the sky. Mum and Dad were looking after Ayu-chan. We were having a picnic. I don't exactly where we were … but there were a lot of roses. __I walked away from the others. The roses were pretty … I tried picking one. But … it was sharp._

Mornings usually left no impression on Miku. They were all blurry. She woke up early, showered, skipped breakfast and then she was out the door. Her manager was usually there to pick her up. They all seemed the same. Grey, tiring and slow.

Today was no different. The alarm clock only beeped twice before she rolled over and turned it off. And by the use of pure self-control, she pulled herself out of bed – she couldn't afford to be late. Things went wrong when people were late. Her father had already left for work this time, Miku wasn't sure but by the looks of it, there was some new type of work. However, something was wrong today. Something that she simply couldn't leave. There wasn't any food on the table for Ayumu.

She glanced at the clock on the wall and frowned. She was going to be late. "Oh, what the hell." And she stepped into the kitchen, wondering where on earth her father kept the plates.

* * *

She had never been one talented at handling impatience. Sorane simply wasn't one who had been gifted with the ability to wait. After all, how on earth could a person wait when there was something that could potentially change your life in front of you? Every single job offer – every single variety show she starred in – every single episode of the drama. They were all important to the actress. But this was a particular one. She didn't view this drama, "Ohayou, Himawari-Chan" as a type of career-booster. Admittedly, it had the potential, but Sorane had only accepted the job because of a certain little note that had been slapped onto the booklet at the last minute.

And just when Sorane could no longer wait, Miku and Lavi appeared in the doorway. It was unmistakable that the pair had been bickering childishly not too long ago, and their manager was desperately trying to calm them down. Allen followed along, amused smile plastered onto his features. The group from Flight Records sat down with little drama and the meeting began.

"Fantastic, our missing friends are finally with us."

Lavi felt anger marks explode onto his forehead. He hadn't taken a proper look at the director before, and despite the name that had been printed on his handout, he had been hoping that it wasn't the man in question. How wrong a person could be. "Oh gods. No."

Beside him, Allen was thinking along the same lines. He was moaning into the table, cushioned by his sinewy arms. The muffled words were somewhere along, "he's entered my life again."

Meanwhile, the person in question kept on talking, a jovial smile on his face all the while. "Now let's begin. 'Ohayou, Himawari-Chan' is not your typical drama-"

Miku rolled her eyes as she tossed her hand out onto the table, "Cross-san, could we please get on with it? I have a busy schedule. I am sure that everybody does." To be frank, she had never been one to enjoy long meetings and nor did she pay much attention to them. The current situation was worsened by the fact that she wasn't an actor and she had a studio album to get back to recording. Her blue eyes also surveyed the state of two of her companions. Both seemed to be close to fainting, or at the very least, throwing up.

Marian Cross eyed this singer. There was no doubt that he had chosen her of all the other idols out there because she had the key things that were needed to promote his new masterpiece. The looks, the voice and the reputation. What he hadn't bargained for was his former idiot apprentices and her shitty mood. "Why should I care about what you want? I have the power here."

Miku realised the big mistake she just made. "Shit."

"That's right, so shut your trap and listen."

The singer was still mouthing a string of swear words under her breath. She also eyed Sorane, who was quite clearly gloating at her marvellous failure. "I'm so going to-"

"Yes, Miku-chan?"

She shut up. _The womanizing bastard.

* * *

_

Lavi was on the rooftop. But it was a different building. It was the set of this new drama. The director had suggested they shoot a trailer that featured him and Miku as a way of advertising and "encouragement for viewers". Which he was totally fine with, if it stayed at that. But looking at the person Marian Cross was, it was probably going to escalate to new heights. He let out a long sigh, eyes half-closed as he lazily viewed the Tokyo skyline for about the billionth time since he arrived in Japan. It seemed that these days, all he wanted to do was stare at the sky. He didn't even visit the dodgy nightclubs much. Not that he was supposed to. Insane reporters and photographers had a tendency to linger near them for some reason. The red head was just about to sink into the dark depths of his thoughts when a door slammed behind him.

He turned to watch Sorane step out from behind the door that was banging against the wall. She was dressed in a costume – a tattered floor-length black dress. Her hair had been dyed a darker brown. Black and Silver accessories dotted the length of her body. The total effect was one of an evil vampiric queen. Which was probably the look they were going for. But Sorane's facial expression really didn't suit the costume. _But she's not acting right now._

During this analysis, Sorane had strode up to Lavi and was leaning on the rails beside him. He couldn't help noticing that the make up artist was pretty skilled – the glitter eye shadow was really striking in the light. Sorane was ignoring his staring as she began to talk. Her tone of voice was a mix of grouchy, unwilling as well as worry. All pretty negative, so naturally the message being conveyed was probably not a fun one. "Lavi."

"Yeah?" He was growing a little confused. This girl who had encouraged him into the Japanese entertainment industry. A girl he hadn't spoken with for while. A girl he actually didn't have any romantic entanglement with. Okay. Not much.

"Did I ever tell you why I suggested you have a go in Japan?"

"Nope. It was a really rushed time then."

The actress tapped her fingers on the rails, appearing to study her manicure intensely. "I guess."

An uncomfortable silence settled for several moments – only pierced by some fierce honking in the distance.

"Lavi. Are you good at talking about stuff?"

He couldn't help injecting much needed jovial quality into the conversation. "Depends on what stuff."

Sorane kicked him in the shins. There wasn't a lot of force behind it – but the pointed toes did hurt. A pinch of exasperation had been tossed into her voice. "Don't joke around. My reputation is on the line here."

"How? By talking to me?" Lavi was actually enjoying the conversation. He already had a pretty good indication of where it was going and it truly didn't matter to him if they got to the point fast enough or not. The break was twenty minutes long. They had time.

"Urgh. Stop screwing with me Lavi. Everyone-"

She was cut off pretty swiftly by Lavi's sudden movement: "pinning" her against the railing, both arms locking any escape route. He didn't really know why, but some form of anger or at least, intense irritation was bubbling up. "You aren't the centre of the fucking universe. Calm down and think before you go around accusing people of screwing around with you." He sighed as he took a step away from her, beginning to turn and walk away. "Talk to me about your problems when you calm down a bit. I don't remember you being the same as you are now." And with those final words, he was gone.

Sorane swore as she unintentionally moved into a squatting position beside the wall. Her last strong chain to sanity, so close but so far.

Lavi was feeling kind of weird. He just swore at a girl he used to have feelings for – at least, might have, that time seemed kind of blurred now. He also wondered if he should have calmed down. But now that the distraction was temporarily erased, he finally got to the point his thoughts had been strolling towards. _That girl in the picture. It's got to be Miku. Only I don't think it's the first time I've seen her when she's at that age. _He stopped near the bottom of the stairs, a fist firmly against the wall. His memory was quite clear. He had been skateboarding, and he hadn't noticed that girl when he went flying past. Hadn't he knocked her against the hand too? And they had spoken, right? _So maybe … that was Miku?_

His frown increased, as he closed his eyes, thinking. Back then, he had kept wondering who she was, where she was from, why she was there. But then he met that French-American model and she had been blasted from his mind. After all, she was gone. Probably not even in the country anymore. Plus, he had everything he could possibly want.

_But_, he told himself, _things are different now. I need to make a choice. If I just left for Europe after the contract is terminated, everything is going to end, and my music career will come to a stop. She probably won't talk to me often either. But do I care about that? _Lavi, usually so brilliant when it came to thinking his relationships through, finally ran into a dead end. He simply didn't know. _Whenever she looks doubtful or hurt, I want to embrace her. Whenever she looks confident and beautiful, I want to kiss her. But even if that's the case, it might not be real love. Actually … what the hell is love anyway?_ He sighed then, standing up straight, determined to shelve his thoughts and get down those goddamned stairs. Bad choice.

Because right there, at the bottom of that flight of stairs, was Miku crying into Allen Walker's arms.

Shit.

_Overloaded feelings,_

_Heavy emotions,_

_Weighing down on your thoughts,_

_When one gets close to the answer,_

_You__'ve got to stop,_

_There's always hidden traps,_

_Waiting to spring,_

_Bad luck,_

_You've gone too far._


	15. Chapter 15 Transparency

Diamond Rose

Chapter 15

Transparency

Allen's earliest memory of Miku was when he was thirteen. He had just arrived at the Brightlight Agency, and got lost on the floor his room was supposed to be in. Not the bravest soul out there, a little nervous, especially when entering somewhere completely new.

_Touching melodies,_

_Reaching deep into your soul,_

_What will I find out?_

_What will you realise?_

_There's one main message:_

_I'm here,_

_Always,_

_For when you need to cry …_

Allen had begun the piano when he was nine. His teacher was Marian Cross. The first time they had met, Allen had been so intimidated that he nearly fell off the piano stool because he was trembling. But looking past that, the days went on. Every day, the teacher would come to his family's mansion and teach him how to play the piano. Scolding him, ordering him, it was a typical student – teacher relationship, with gambling thrown in sometimes. Allen had never been particularly fond of the red-haired teacher but it was most certainly thanks to him that he had risen to amazing heights – was recognised as a brilliant pianist when he was twelve. And when he finally decided that he wanted to get out of the hell hole he had lived in for his entire, he applied for Brightlight Agency when they were holding international auditions. And gosh was he overjoyed to be accepted.

Now he was here, finally. Only he was lost. Damn. He sighed, staring at the map he had been given. His Japanese was rusty, owing to the fact that his mother hadn't spoken Japanese to him for at least a year and the fact that he had been living in England all his life. "Dayum. Where am I supposed to be?"

"You're lost?" The voice was most definitely female.

Allen turned around and nodded once, "Yeah, my first time here, so …"

She nodded. One look indicated that she was a mix. After all, what type of Japanese person had blue eyes? Apart from that, she looked like the typical girl who was aiming for stardom – pretty and seemed to have a brain. The next few observations were based on her choice of clothes. She had obviously forgone the uniform regulations (which were actually really casual). She wore long-sleeved shirt that had the Brightlight logo on it, but was covering it up with a denim vest. Then she was decked in cargo pants and red skate shoes. Those red streaks in her hair were also kind of difficult to miss. Now she was talking. "Pass those handouts the receptionist gave you, maybe I can help you."

Allen handed them over, feeling somewhat relieved that he wasn't being made fun of – at the very least.

She flipped through them, and grinned when she came to his room details. "Ah, you were actually quite close." She pointed down the hallway, "Keep going down, then turn left, look for the room that's marked with your room number." Here, she pointed to the number in question, grinning. "Hope you settle in, composer-in-training."

Allen was finding it hard to dislike this girl in any way. Maybe she was a little on the up-herself side but she seemed like fun to be around. So before they parted ways, he spoke to her, "Hey, what's your name?"

She turned, and blinked once at him. "Miku." And she was gone.

Allen had made a decent set of friends over the year but despite his previous intentions, he had declined their invitations to a New Years party. In his opinion, New Years was something better of spent quietly. It was supposed to be a time when one thought over the past year and looked forward to the next one. So on that cold and starry night, Allen had gotten permission to stay on the roof. Normally, students were not permitted to be up there after dark. _But then again, _Allen mused as he leaned against the railing, _today's a special time of year._ He had begun to drift off into his thoughts before her heard the creaky door open behind him. He looked over his shoulder, white hair tossed into his eyes by the wind, and saw the familiar figure: Miku. "Ah, hi."

Miku seemed to recognise him as well, and grinned as she walked next to him – standing a good two metres away from him as she too, leaned against the railing. Her bell sleeves dangled over the railing, as did her long hair, spreading over her shoulders, thrown this way and that by the wind. Her eyes failed to make connection with Allen's but at the very least she spoke to him. "You're the guy who nearly made it to his room."

Allen couldn't help laughing a little at that description. "Ha, I'm amazed you remembered." There was an unfamiliar feeling in the air … but it was oddly warm.

She just shrugged, closing her eyes for a moment. "I like remembering things. Memories make up a person after all."

And for some reason, Allen agreed. "You have a point there."

Suddenly, Miku had realised something. Whirling around to face him, she questioned him, perhaps a little more excited than one would expect. "Gosh, I totally forgot! What's your name?"

"Allen. Allen Walker." He had barely finished his answer when the fireworks started.

Miku laughed as she turned to gaze upon the brilliant fireworks in the night sky. "Nice to meet you, Allen!"

Nobody could deny it. That moment … at exactly 12:00 AM … was beautiful.

_On this night,_

_Lit up by fireworks,_

_I shouted your name,_

_And we finally met,_

_You'll treasure it,_

_That memory,_

_Won't you__?_

When Allen, Miku and Sorane were fifteen, it was like they were officially a band of friends – inseparable. But that was also the time were things were starting to get shaky.

On this particular night, it had been the "graduation concert" for all the kids 15-year-olds in the singing department. The name itself was incorrect, as many did not leave the agency until years later.

Tonight, Sorane had finished screaming her congratulations for her friend and had been dragged off by her mother. So with clocks slowly ticking towards midnight, Allen and Miku were sitting on their familiar spot on the roof. Again.

Miku was sitting on the cold cement ground, shivering. The wind blew mercilessly up high, and she could only pull her thin jacket closer around her shoulders as she and her friend spoke. And she wanted to treasure this moment, for she and Allen very rarely spoke alone. The same went for Allen.

"Did I do well?"

That was one of the things Allen thought was interesting about Miku. You could tell her she did brilliantly until time stopped, but she'd always pester you for details, as though asking you to say she didn't do well. "If you keep asking about that, I'm going to stop talking to you."

Silence ensued.

"Allen. Do you love Sorane?"

Well that was out of the blue, Allen sighed as he felt some form of heat rush up into his face. "I … I don't think I do."

"Then why are you blushing?"

"Fine, maybe I do like her."

"But it's probably not a very serious love."

That statement caught him off-guard. Not because of the blunt tone it was delivered in, but rather that she had gotten it right. Allen had already perceived that his love for Sorane was a more superficial one – it wasn't to be taken too seriously. But not only that, it was born from the worst type of love there ever was. Pity. "Amazing.:

Miku was smirking, albeit a little awkwardly, after all, this was not really a situation where one bore confident grins. "I am amazing."

Allen also felt slightly relieved. The tension that had formed was slowly crumbling, loosening thanks to the joke. "I am more amazing than you in other aspects."

"Not when it comes to talking about Sorane."

And you know what? She was right.

_I confessed to you,_

_That my feelings for her,_

_Weren't very real,_

_You just smiled at me,_

_Pondered over it a little,_

_And went on with life,_

_I guess,_

_You're just simple like that…_

A person can change a lot in two years. Allen hadn't seen Miku for a while – he had only met her very briefly over those two years, and had never properly caught up, to discuss things like they used to every once and a while. And deep down, he silently suspected, that Miku didn't really talk to anybody nowadays.

But finally, he had the chance to speak to her again. The song-writer tended to get those benefits. He looked at her across the room. She truly was different. The hair had grown out and she had eliminated the red highlights, opting instead for a single red streak. Her dress style had also improved – a black dress-coat, plain white leg-warmers and black flats. _Ah, she's been to dance lessons again. _But that wasn't all Allen noticed. There was more. One thing being her expression.

Why was there a "lost" feeling in her eyes?

_The window was always there,_

_The glass was perfect,_

_Transparent,_

_It gave me a full view of you,_

_But now,_

_That glass is cracking,_

_Are you breaking too?_


	16. Chapter 16 Light My Way

Diamond Rose

Chapter 16

Light My Way

Miku knew exactly what to do when you were feeling pain. You held it inside you so as to not trouble those who had to work with you, those who cared deeply about you. If they questioned you about your troubles, only give them brief details. Miku had done just that for the past few months, so why couldn't she keep it up? Why was she crying in Allen's arms? Even though they were so close, why was his voice so far away?

"Miku, what's wrong, Miku?" Ah, there it was, the desperate worry that she had been doing her best to prevent.

She clung onto her friend, no longer caring about the tears that were streaming from her eyes as she sobbed. "I've tried for so long-" A hacking sob cut her words off, "I don't get it – why doesn't he see?"

Allen didn't know what Miku was talking about – she never told him the full story. But her tears, the frustration mixed into her words was enough to make him understand. _You've been crying in there alone … for too long._

"I was hiding – that's true – but …" Her words died off as she kept crying, shaking, tears running down her cheeks, "why did he not notice anything?"

Allen was about to speak when he noticed something. Movement. To be specific – movement before complete stillness. He looked out the corner of his eye. _Shit. I don't know why I'm thinking this. But … shit._

Miku had felt the sudden change in the atmosphere – Allen had surely stiffened. She slowly wiped the tears from her eyes as she pulled herself out of Allen's grip. As soon as she laid eyes on Lavi, she froze. And those tears she had just wiped away ... suddenly, they were renewed and came tumbling down her cheeks once more. "Oh my god – no." Had he heard her? When had he been there?

Lavi didn't know what to think. Why was Miku hugging Allen? Why was she crying? But the most important question was why he was feeling so disturbed. She wasn't his girlfriend – he had no reason to fill that way. Maybe he had an emotional attachment to her and besides, it had to be one-sided. She had never given him a clear sign of affection before. _And if she did, I'd think she was on drugs._ He felt that he should say something – break the ice. But what was he supposed to say? What tone of voice was he supposed to use?

Miku was thinking along the same lines. She couldn't think of any solution to her problem. So she ran. It felt good, running. But it was only really a temporary solution.

* * *

Somehow, Lenalee and Kanda were in the perfect position to talk. Miku had left to take a walk, Allen was probably sitting in front of a piano composing, Sorane had indicated that she was heading up to the roof for a breath of fresh air. Lavi had been out of reach as soon as the shooting began. In other words, the set was very peaceful. Sure, people were running around shouting, setting things up, cleaning things up and getting frustrated in general. But it was peaceful. All the other actors and actresses had their makeup completed and were now sitting in different corners of the building, reading over the script. There was still a frantic touch to the atmosphere, but it was overall … peaceful.

Lenalee was perched on a seat in the dressing room and appeared to be doing something incredibly stupid. Only it wasn't. While she seemed to be tossing photo after photo onto the floor, she was really just looking over the past – admiring the joys in life she had experienced those past few years.

A golden sunset.

Miku and Lenalee's luvo.

Sakura blossoms scattered across wet cement.

A potted sunflower.

Sleeping Allen.

None of the images were perfect – that was for sure. Lenalee wasn't a photographer, she was a stylist. But each one was precious to her. Going by her philosophy, she had captured moments in the continuous flow of time – the little things that so many ignored but needed to be treasured.

*click*

Lenalee blinked as she looked up to see Kanda standing in the doorway, a Polaroid photo falling into his hand. She smiled a little, "Hi."

He stepped into the room, staring at the stacks of photos strewn across the floor. He seemed to analyse each one, take in the little details – like how some of them were a little rumpled at the corners, others perfectly clean. Some with little dates jotted in the corners, others with doodles. "That woman certainly wasn't lying when she said you'd be into doing that kind of thing."

She sighed as she stood up from her seat, "You came to say that?" Lenalee knew full well that it wasn't the case – Kanda never dwelled on the little things. If he did mention the little things – it was going to lead to something else.

Kanda shook his head as he drew out a notebook of some kind, held it out by its spine so the pages faced downwards … and everything wedged between the pages fell out. Lenalee caught glimpses of the Polaroids.

A blurry full moon hanging in the sky.

An obviously forced luvo with Chloe Xu.

Shadows of a tree cast over orange-tinted cement.

A flowerbed of cyclamens.

Lenalee listening to her iPod in a lounge.

The stylist couldn't understand it. She knew that Kazu had set both of them up with the Polaroid cameras and film. Both had been told to take pictures as often as possible. But she couldn't understand why the things he took pictures of were so similar to her's. And the number of Polaroids he had taken – they most definitely matched her's. "I didn't know about this side of you."

Kanda was looking straight at her. As always, his blue eyes were cold but captivating at the same time – why would anybody want to look away? "That's 'cos I didn't want to show that you're the only one who can make me do this insane crap."

All of a sudden, Lenalee was intensely aware of her surroundings. The light hum of the air-conditioning system. The stray hairs in her fringe and pigtails. The wooden floor she was standing on. The light reflecting off the shiny surfaces of the hundreds of photos. She was frozen – she couldn't speak. She let the silence drag on until Kanda broke it. Along with her heart.

"It's been two years. We can stop doing this."

"Wait-"

She watched as the door slammed shut, leaving her alone with those pictures. Alone with nothing more than memories.

_What's the point of memories?_

_What's the point?_

_When they can't grant wishes,_

_They can only give tears,_

_Give pain at different degrees,_

_Don't leave me alone,_

_With nothing but memories …_

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?"

Miku was crying but that didn't stop her from shouting back. "THAT'S RETARDED! WHAT'S THE POINT-"

"YOU DIDN'T TELL ME! WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU?"

"WHAT'S WRONG WITH NOT TELLING YOU?"

Lavi was brimming with anger – he didn't even care that he was shouting at a girl anymore, he just needed to vent. "YOU WERE LYING TO ME!"

"I WASN'T LYING! THERE WASN'T ANYTHING TO BE GAINED FROM TELLING YOU EITHER!" Miku was going to add more, but she stopped herself.

Lavi scowled. "What? You thought you'd be able to gain _something_ by keeping me in the dark?"

Miku was growing more disgusted by the second. "WE WERE FRIENDS!" The tears seemed to stop – perhaps anger was a much more powerful force than sadness. "FRIENDS!"

"You wanted to be _friends_." It was quite clear what he was indicating – that Miku hadn't truly wanted to be friends with him. She had wanted more. And what hurt the most about the statement was that it was largely correct.

Miku was trembling under Lavi's glare and she slowly turned her head as she heard footsteps. They had been yelling, of course the staff would come running. And what would happen if they found out that this was happening? There was no doubt that the occurrence would leak out to the tabloids. And they would crucify her, most definitely. With this decision weighing on her, she turned, pushing past Allen, ignoring Lavi. She was headed for the room where she had left her bag and jacket. It was nearing evening, people wouldn't be recognising her left, right and centre – she could make sure of that.

As she rushed out of the set, she donned a pair of sunglasses and pulled her hair up into a ponytail. She hailed a taxi, climbing in as soon as if stopped. "Kumotsuki Cemetery."

"That's quite a while away-"

Miku didn't care. "It doesn't matter. I have enough. Just make sure you get there." Her hands were still trembling, and her eyes were probably red behind the dark lenses. Sometimes, a person just needed to take a break and think. And sometimes, a person needed parental guidance.

_When I imagine your face,_

_It's not extremely clear,_

_When I try to hear your voice,_

_I don't hear anything,_

_But sometimes,_

_When I want to talk to you,_

_You seem to reply,_

_Deep in my heart …_


	17. Chapter 17 Crying Roses

Diamond Rose

Chapter 17

Crying Roses

Miku could remember the funeral as clear as if it was only yesterday. Tomoko Kawaguchi's many workmates, friends and family gathered there, as well as a crowd of reporters that were barricaded several metres away. Miku could remember what clothes she wore, how she watched everything behind the fringe that fell over her eyes – hiding her from the rest of the world as she shivered in the lonely world of her mind. So many flowers were laid next to her grave – all of them cyclamens.

_Saying goodbye._

Today, nothing had changed much. There were still flowers – one of them being ones Miku had brought last month. Her father's name was painted in red; the grave was ready to receive him when the time came. Today, it was starting to rain as the sky darkened, derived of the sun's light as it sank out of view behind the skyscrapers of the inner city.

Miku knelt down on the cement. She didn't care that it was already soaked by the rain – increasing in intensity by the second. She threw her sunglasses on the ground next to her, the same went for the scrunchy that previously held up her hair. She didn't care that her designer jeans were going to be filthy – didn't care that her hair would be a nightmare for Lenalee the next day … _I don't even know if I'll turn up at work tomorrow …_ She smiled awkwardly as she thought this. _I wonder what they're doing now. I expect Marian Cross is throwing a fit._

She pressed her hands into her thighs as she bent her head, listening to a few cars rush past. _Okaa-san. I guess, I should start crying to you. Something I've never done. Right?_

_I hate it,_

_Leaving me alone,_

_Alone in the rain,_

_Nobody to speak to,_

_Alone to cry,_

_Alone to remember,_

_That I love,_

_Everything about you._

Lenalee had never felt so utterly dead before. She had gathered up the hundreds of polaroids that had been thrown onto the floor and shoved them rather unceremoniously into a tote bag. They were rather accurate representations of her feelings: mixed up, unorderly, mad … It was just missing one important emotion: sadness. And that was the dominant feeling that had taken over Lenalee. It echoed endlessly in her heart as she sat outside the set, staring at her cell phone which had failed to connect to Miku's cell phone billions of times. _It feels really lonely._

She bent her head backwards, watching the sky darken, the clouds overhead swirl and move as they were blown by the wind. She knew that she had responsibilities – things to do, things to plan. But at times like these, it felt incredibly easy to just sit down and stare at something. Sometimes, the brain needed a break. A big one.

Two years ago, on Christmas morning, Lenalee ran into the park. And by doing so, nearly ran into the person she was supposed to meet – Kanda Yuu. She halted right before him, madly apologising. "I'm sorry-"

"Lee Lenalee?"

She seemed to lose her voice right there. She swallowed and then answered, "Um – yeah. That's me."

"I'm Kanda Yuu." He studied her for a moment longer. "You have the package?"

She nodded, holding up the Christmas gift Kazue had given her, "Thise one?"

Kanda looked at it for a moment. "Yes, it must be."

Several minutes later, they were sitting on the dewy grass, staring at the two polaroid cameras, and hand-written note.

Lenalee picked it up, reading the messy scrawl that was so uniquely Kazue's. "_Treasure your memories. Record your lives, go your separate ways. Then return and see who has led the more precious road._" The Chinese girl glanced over at Kanda, who's eyes were directed at the light snow piled atop some of the trees surrounding them. "Do you know what she means?"

His features seemed to twist a fraction – as though he was exasperated – irritated after being asked a stupid question. "Take pictures. Come back and compare." He turned back to face Lenalee, "Ignoring that woman for a moment."

Lenalee disliked his way of addressing her mentor, but she kept her mouth shut.

"Those pants. You're the weird girl who ran into me at the airport."

She wanted to hide in a hole badly. "Uh ... yeah."

And all of a sudden, she felt that she kind of didn't want to hide in a hole beaus Kanda had just smiled at her. It was unnatural, seeing a smile on his features. He had never seemed the type to smile and laugh – to Lenalee, he had been the cool, handsome, untouchable man. Not the one who smiled in amusement. His words made a huge impact, "I'm glad the design turned out so well." Lenalee could have died and gone to heaven then.

She nearly blushed then as she answered, "Thanks to you."

"I'm not the one who sewed those things on. Nor am I the one who drew the original design."

Lenalee lost, why bother trying to retain her modesty? "Thanks," it was one word but coupled with her brilliant smile, it was enough to convey a gargantuan amount of gratitude and delight.

The pair lapsed into a silence – awkward and comfortable at the same time. Lenalee had felt an oddly huge amount of joy back then. She had every right to be nervous, after all, she had parted ways with her mentor, began her life without anybody to cling onto, and accepted a request from the woman she respected so much. And of course, she had to admit, however foolish and shallow the observation was, met an amazing guy. Maybe he had a horrible attitude but it wasn't hard to tell that deep down, he had a shred of decency in him – a slightly warped form of kindness. It was a short moment in her life that she wanted to be able to recall perfectly. So stuck in the moment, she reached for her camera, checked for film, pointed it at the sky and took a picture. As the film rolled out, she grabbed it, grinning as she studied at the blurry image – a few wispy clouds and then some heavier ones at the edges. With this picture, she'd at least be able to know what the sky had looked like in that moment.

Unbeknownst to her though, Kanda Yuu had been watching her and he had smiled a second time that day.

* * *

Ayumu stretched, leaning back in his seat. The sky had darkened greatly and rain was starting to pour. He glanced at the digital clock sitting on his desk. 09:55PM. The thirteen-year-old frowned as he stood and retrieved his phone from his school bag. He ignored the first four unread texts – probably from Ren and another one of those girls in his class. He clicked on the one Miku had sent him in the morning. After scanning it five times, he flipped his phone shut, growing worried. _If Miku says she'd be back at nine the latest, she'd be back. So why isn't she?_

He glanced at his window again. The rain was pounding on the glass, making it vibrate a little. Ayumu bit his lip and turned away to start flicking through his contact list. _Desperate times called for desperate measures._ And what exactly were the desperate measures?

Allen Walker.

"Hello-"

"Walker-san. Where's onee-chan?"

"Uh ..."

"You don't know? I thought you'd know! Don't you guys work together or something? I saw her calling you about work once-"

"I knew where she was until around seven today."

Ayumu swallowed. _It's nearly three hours._ "Why don't you know where she is?"

"Ayumu ... none of us know where she is."

"Wait – has she been-"

"Don't think kidnapped. Think missing because she kind of ran away."

'Why'd she run away?"

Allen seemed to be having a lot of difficulty on the other side, "Uh ... well ... I don't think I should really say. They're like ... private-"

Whatever patience Ayumu had left evaporated in that instant, "You know what? Screw you. You're useless." And he ended the call. He didn't care that he had been rude – he had never been on friendly terms with Miku's co-workers and agency friends. He started grabbing various items and throwing them into a backpack – coat, wallet, torch. He didn't really know why he was packing those things – they just had the potential to come in handy.

He started to think a little feverishly. Where would Miku go if she was stressed to the point of running away? The majority of his memories involved her being the clam, composed, strong person she usually was. But that small percentage of her weaker side ... Ayumu thought back, to those times when she cried, when she had arguments with her friends. And then back to that time when she almost had a row with their father every single day. She was so stubborn back then – set on leaving home for the Talent Agency. Ayumu would always hear music from her stereo after those rows.

It was always the same singer ...

Then it hit him like a bomb.

_It was okaa-san._

Ayumu knew that the current situation wasn't really one suitable for smiling. Activities that would have been more suitable would have been fretting and calling people in order to find out her whereabouts. And rushing to places where she could be. But Ayumu smiled just a little as he realised that for once, perhaps he'd be able to help his sister. His sister who had been his protector for a large part of his life. It was time to return the favour.

_You can always act strong,_

_Putting on a smile when you're sad,_

_But sometimes you crack,_

_And that's when it's you in need,_

_There's no point in smiling then,_

_It's best to just accept that hug,_

_And be thankful to god ..._

A/N - This was a really difficult chapter for me to write XD I went through a process of writing a paragraph, deleting half of it, then deleting a whole scene and rewriting it. I hope the final material is satisfactory =] I think the characters I really adore in this arc/section/part of the story have to be Ayumu and Lavi (even though he doesn't appear in this chapter). Either way, enjoy ^_^ and you know the drill with the whole R/R thing =]


	18. Chapter 18 Stop Taking Detours

Diamond Rose

Chapter 18

Stop Taking Detours

Lavi had never really understood how much his agency loved him. That is, until he saw the twenty-four print-outs his manager had laid out on his desk. The redhead flipped through them slightly tentatively – they were all job offers. The typical modelling jobs that paid well. A few TV drama invitations. But what hit him the hardest was out of all the jobs that his manager had decided were the best to consider ... only three of them gave him the option of remaining in Japan. It didn't take him long to throw the other twenty-one onto the floor and start reading and rereading the three that remained.

His contract with the record label wasn't going to expire until later that year but it really killed him to find that he was already looking at various career paths that all lead him away from Miku – the last thing he wanted. It wasn't that he couldn't keep chasing her outside the professional field – he most certainly could. But if he was going to do the maths – the probability of them actually getting somewhere was low. And judging by their luck, even if they did end up together, the rest of the world was probably going to find out and Miku would be fired from her agency.

Lavi knew that if that happened, they would be totally screwed. Because it wasn't hard to see that being a singer was what Miku had always devoted the most effort into. Her job was her life. Ask her to give that up and she might as well throw herself off a skyscraper. So in order to remain together – at least, within the same city – Lavi was hoping to stay in Japan. He knew it wasn't impossible, especially since he seemed to be scoring rather well on those Oricon polls. His popularity in Japan wasn't bad but that didn't mean he had a nice, clean road to walk on. No. He didn't have one, because he belonged to a Western agency. And that meant that if he couldn't rake in enough cash, they were going to pull him out and put him back into modelling, where they couldn't possibly end up with losses as long as Lavi maintained his nice face, and kept that glorious hair over his right eye.

The young male sighed as he walked out onto the balcony, abandoning the three booklets on his desk. It was pouring. But he didn't mind the rain. It seemed to be in synch with his emotions. They were on the lower end of the scale – but there was still strength in him. He looked up at the sky, wondering if Miku was out there somewhere, crying. He felt terrible when he considered it. Why had he been so stupid? In the end, it boiled down to one thing: humans were emotional beings. He had been pissed off and had said things he had only ever believe in partially.

He sank onto the cold floor, still facing the sky. "What am I supposed to do now?'

* * *

Miku closed her eyes, feeling the rain fall onto her. She was definitely soaked now. Her skin was steadily forming goose bumps. But she didn't shiver. She didn't focus on the cold. For some reason, she felt at ease.

Perhaps it was the recognition that everything around her – all those daily distractions had suddenly evaporated. There wasn't any busy schedule. No photoshoots. No live shows. No handshake events. No practice sessions. Nothing. It was just her, alone, free to think and do what she wished. Time could have stopped or fast-forwarded and she wouldn't have noticed.

_So what am I supposed to do? Lavi hates me. I should have told him the truth. _But Miku also told herself that she wasn't at fault – she had done the right thing – hadn't she? _The thing most likely to destroy the friendship – that brief thing we had was the fact that we had met before._ She nearly smiled as she thought this. _How ironic. Our meeting guaranteed that we would never be together._ The statement was immediately countered by none other than herself. _No. It is Lavi's fault. Who went berserk over something he wasn't told?_

Miku sighed as her mind ran circles. She tapped her fingers on her denim-clad knees. _Ah. No. I shouldn't be thinking about what went wrong – I should be focusing on what to do._ And a new debate began. _Trying to end the contract is ridiculous – it's already been signed. I'll have to bear it until the end of the year – this is only a temporary unit. Once the contract is over I can go back and ask to be transferred to another label. _So the long-term part of the plan was sorted. She needed to focus on short-term now.

She glanced back up at her mother's grave. "What would you do, okaa-san?"

* * *

Ayumu was out of the taxi the moment it stopped. He tossed the back-pack on a moment later, running to the cemetery entrance before stopping. His hands rested on the metal gate. To be frank, he was completely unsure of what he was doing. He was near certain that Miku was there at their mother's grave. But he didn't know if it was right to walk in and speak to her. He closed his eyes for a moment, thinking. It appeared that he would have to make a bet that in front of a certain grave, his sister would need his assistance.

He walked in tentatively; every footstep seemed unnaturally loud as her stepped in one puddle after another. But the logical part of him knew that his footsteps would be masked by the pounding rain. Ayumu stopped several metres away. There she was. Like him, Miku was dripping wet, kneeling there, thinking. He didn't dare make a sound. It felt wrong, to just barge in and at the same time, that was exactly what he wanted to do. It seemed that fate liked to make decisions for him for at that moment, his cell phone rang, belting out a second of techno goodness before he silenced it.

Too late. Miku had looked up to see her younger brother. She stood slowly to face him. The rain was still pouring.

She blinked some of the rain out of her eyes, "Ayumu." A mixture of surprise and slight pleasure dominated her voice. "You found me."

"Yeah." Ayumu couldn't hold it in. He walked forward towards his sister.

And as he had hoped, she embraced him. "I'm so glad it was you who found me." And that statement made sense to both siblings. Through all the sleepless nights and lonely evenings they had each other. Be it the silent dinner or the depressing afternoon at the local park – they had each other. There wasn't anyone else in the whole world who understood them better. They understood each other the best.

The younger sibling smiled slightly. It was tentative, that expression. "How long do you need to think? I can tell otou-san something. An excuse-"

Miku shook her head as she looked down at him, "You won't need to do such a thing. I'll be facing things head-on from now on."

Ayumu didn't bother getting her to clarify what she was saying. "Okay."

"Let's find a taxi ... somehow."

_I've searched everywhere,_

_For clues that lead to the answer,_

_Subtle and small things,_

_When the solution was so simple,_

_Just face things head-on._

Lavi walked through the dark streets towards a certain house he had visited before. Miku's home. He knew that walking there was like asking to get his legs amputated but he didn't mind. Besides, it gave him time to think. He didn't even mind the cold. At least the rain wasn't a problem – he was armed with an umbrella.

It was ages until he reached the two-storey building. He had rehearsed the scene in his mind three times now but every part of him doubted that it would really be performed in reality perfecting. Before he could enter the gates, he heard a car pull up behind him. Turning, his one good eye saw the taxi pull up, and the Kawaguchi siblings step out. The rain was still pouring, both of the siblings were sopping wet but even so, he stepped away from the gate, sheltering Miku and Ayumu with the umbrella.

Miku turned to face him slowly, and she eyed him for only a moment before turning to her brother, "Ayu-chan. Go inside and dry up. I'll come in soon."

The two watched Ayumu disappear inside, all the while eying Lavi suspiciously.

Miku smiled warmly as she watched the door shut. "He still doesn't trust you. Even after seeing us two plastered across billboards, magazine covers and TV screens." She paused to properly face him, "So what did you come for?"

Lai had actually come for more than one thing, but he ordered himself to get to the most important issue first. 'To start over. I came to start over." He had been preparing himself for a scowl – a slap. But he received none. Instead, he received a beautiful, warm smile.

"I wanted the same." And as though they were two strangers, Miku stepped back., introducing herself in the process. "My name is Kawaguchi Miku. Nice to meet you." She bowed – a short, polite bow. A typical greeting in Japan.

Lavi had a sudden feeling – it was extremely positive. And at the same time, he felt a pang of sadness – perhaps he regretted that they had gotten to a point where they really needed to turn everything over, to start again. But it was inevitable now – they had to. So he just nodded once, smiled as he would to a stranger, and spoke, "I'm Bookman Lavi." Using the Japanese way of naming – surname first. It felt unnatural, his words and actions – he felt that he shouldn't need to act this way.

But it was just too bad that he needed to. It was the only way he could act. _No._ He told himself, _I could just sweep her up into my arms. But I don't know what would happen if I did._ And that, was something that scared Lavi.

* * *

Miku drummed her fingers against the table. New day. New surroudings. New music. New lyrics. New song.

But there was still a lot of old mixed in with the new. And one of them was Lavi. Even though they were supposed to have started over.

_New things,_

_Clean, simple, elegant,_

_But as it turns out,_

_We don't want things like that,_

_We want the old,_

_The messed-up, beautiful thing,_

_That we used to have and abused._


	19. Chapter 19 Routine I'm Not Used To

Diamond Rose

Chapter 19

Routine I'm Not Used To

"Allen."

"Yes?" the young man spoke through a mouthful of chocolate crepe.

Miku let the stapled sheets fall from her carefully manicured fingers and land on the marble desk. "I love the instrumental. But as Cross said, the lyrics suck."

Allen deftly handled the situation by avoiding the topic. "When did you drop the honorific's on that guy's name?"

It wasn't easy, getting past this singer. Miku smirked as she countered the futile attempt at an escape. "Since he wasn't in the room. Don't ditch the topic, the lyrics need a rewrite. Have you even seen the script for 'Ohayou, Himawari-chan'?" As she spoke, she felt kind of stupid – she could already see the answer plastered across the composer's face.

"No."

Miku sighed as she grabbed the draft copy of the lyrics, grabbed an automatic pencil and began her edits.

Allen watched her intently, not daring to speak. But then again, recently, when did he dare to do so in a careless manner? It had only been a week since that occurrence. It still weighed on their minds, but he couldn't imagine how Miku was feeling. _It'd be impossible. She'd never tell me either._ So he did what he always did for his friend. He sat at the sidelines, watching, and ready to catch her if she did fall.

-snip- -snip- -snip-

Lenalee stared in the mirror as she finished chopping the last strand off. She felt so different – looked so different. She managed a small smile at those thoughts. _Well, I've just chopped more than half of my hair off._ Her hair now ended around her chin. She glanced down at the newspaper-covered floor. That long hair she treasured. Discarded. But as she looked at the remains of her previously-long hair, she asked herself why she had suddenly decided to cut it off. _Perhaps, I was trying to run away. Like discarding my old self?_ With this thought weighing on her heart, she looked back at the girl in the mirror. _Somehow, I am different._ It was a small change, but it was enough to set the first crystal domino toppling.

She peered closer at her reflection, "Maybe I'll get Misaki-chan to trim it. It's a bit messy."

"_In a changing world, I overcame time,_

_And searched for a future in the scratched sky,_

_On an endless night, when the heartbeats in my chest,_

_Trembled, they flitted through and echoed,_

_Even if the twinkling light leaves me,_

_I'll make my way to my dream at the place where it goes around,_

_The miracle should come true …"_

Miku didn't dare glance up through the glass as she sang. Or at least, when she did look up, she didn't focus on those facial expressions. Everything about the setting seemed to make her uncomfortable. Or maybe it was just Lavi. She hoped it didn't show on her face.

Pushing away her emotional state though, recording was going along both smoothly and badly. It was the usual crazy timetable, she was tired true, but then again, wasn't she always?

"Okay, stop, take a break."

Miku nodded once, discarding the headphones and headed to the table where her bag sat. It was low-riding, with black leather straps and red sequins sewn on in the pattern of racing stripes. She dug in, withdrawing her daily planner and ran her hand down today's date.

_7:00 AM – main office_

_7:10 AM – begin recording/memorise lyrics_

_8:30 AM – dance lesson_

_10:00 AM – break_

_10:25 AM – voice training_

_12:45 PM – recording_

_3:00 PM – progress meeting_

_3:30 PM – Shibuya 109 CROSS ANGEL magazine shoot_

_5:40 PM – CROSS ANGEL interview session_

_6:40 PM – practice session with band/recording_

_9:00 PM – dinner_

_9:30 PM – break_

_10:00 PM – sales report_

_10:30 PM – end._

Miku couldn't help sighing. It wasn't that today was particularly tiring – it wasn't actually that bad. It was nearly the end of the recording session today. And truth to be told, she dreaded progress meetings with Cross. Because he was busy driving the actors like slaves on set, he didn't get much news regarding the recording progress. So now, once every three days, he would call LaKu and demand a meeting. She'd only been to two so far and they killed. She knelt on the carpet, glaring at the small entry. "I really, really, don't want to go."

And right then, Lavi magically appeared over her shoulder. "You don't want to go where?"

She turned around after having a mini heart attack. "You know."

The red head blinked, "Ah. Progress meeting."

The phrase had turned into some type of taboo for the pair within the short period of only a week. Immediately, a grey atmosphere settled.

"Lavi."

Lavi blinked – what was Miku going to say? He was never sure about her now. It was like what happened last week had been an effective reset switch. _Which isn't necessarily a good thing._ "Yeah?"

Miku was studying her planner. "You're not going to the shoot are you?" She wasn't sure if she was going to need to elaborate, but she half hoped that his manager had been nice enough to share the finer points of her timetable with him.

Lavi met her expectations. "Nup. But I'd like to." He was grinning slyly here.

Miku responded with a friendly wack, "Girls don't like players. And when were you into gothic Lolita fashion?"

"Since I heard you were going to start wearing it."

"I AM NOT!"

Lavi laughed as he patted her shoulder, "I'm kidding, but I bet you'd look great either way."

And for some reason, although she was supposed to feel relieved, Miku felt bad. Not quite terrible or heart-broken, but just bad. Love was something she didn't dare bring up, even saying she liked something on a talk show or to a staff member was a hesitant-filled affair. It pained her to see that Lavi was still himself – love was an easy, simple thing. He could even joke about it. But she didn't know if that was still possible for her. And then, did she still want Lavi to love her? Did she love him? She felt so muddled.

Lavi watched Miku's expression gradually worsen before he snapped his fingers in front of her eyes.

She blinked, looking up at him sharply. Those blue eyes were probably going to be bad for his health in the long run.

He smiled gently, "Don't think of sad things, okay?" He knew that he wasn't supposed to care so deeply about her well-being, or at least, if they had really only met a week ago, he wouldn't be capable of caring that much. Part of him, really, really wished that turning back time would be possible. Because he wanted to do that more than anything.

* * *

Miku truly didn't want to go inside the conference room. It wasn't the clean, orderly manner of the room that frightened her. It was the possibly drunk womaniser sitting inside it that discouraged her from entering. But then again, if you were in the business, there were a lot of things you had to do that you didn't like to do. And frankly, attending a progress meeting was probably on the very bottom on the list. So she took a breath and entered.

"Nice of you to join us."

"Hi, Cross-san."

She joined the ranks of the rest of the small collection of staff that had gathered.

"So tell me, how is the music going? I'm not worried about the theme song at this point, but I want some insert songs-"

"Cross-san, you only sent us the request the day before yesterday, there's a lot of composing going on already."

Silently, Miku noted, _So that's why Allen's been eating so much lately._

Cross didn't seem bothered by the protest, "Okay, just get them done. I don't want my editing team holed up at episode 4 because there aren't any useable tracks from you guys."

Frantic writing on a notepad followed.

Secretly, Miku wondered why almost everyone in the room seemed to regard Cross as something close to a god. True, he was British and was highly talented in film. But how did that merit to everyone basically kissing his ass? _I guess there are some things I don't know about him._

And with that lingering thought, she let the meeting fly over her head, apart from when some lazy questions were directed at her.

Just a gothic Lolita magazine to worry about next.

_Slowly, slowly,_

_Day by day,_

_I'm starting to get used to the routine,_

_I would have been used to,_

_Had I not fallen for you so hard …_


	20. Chapter 20 Hesitant Raindrops

Diamond Rose

Chapter 20

Hesitant Raindrops

Lenalee fiddled with the straps on her tote bag as she stood outside the door, waiting for Kanda to answer. Nervous was too weak a word to describe her current state of mind. Her hands were visibly shaking, and standing up seemed to take a lot of effort. And what was this strange sensitivity her neck had? Ah – the breeze could more easily attack her neck now, seeing that she cut her hair short. As the Chinese stylist made these self-observations, the door eased open, and in doing so, scared her out of her wits.

"Ee-" She clamped a hand over her mouth as she looked up at Kanda. Who looked tired, yes, but also unbelievably … and she never imagined herself saying this word … hot.

The blue eyes sent a glare at her, before softening with recognition and then hardening again. "What are you doing here?"

Lenalee bit her lip before answering. "I heard you're leaving tomorrow, so I thought … that I should say goodbye or something." Her voice lacked the usual cheer and confidence. Her eyes were still straightforward, but the window they offered to her emotions displayed dark, fragile, negative emotions.

Kanda almost stared at her. When had the changes occurred? And were they his fault? It was almost stupid at this point to deny his role in this. And then he had to consider his actions. Did he want to make up with her, confess, reveal to her that he had been waiting for god knows how long, wondering why he wasn't anywhere near the top of her list of importance. At any rate, he may as well let her inside. He opened the door wide, and gestured inside, "I think you should come inside."

Lenalee didn't know whether to jump with joy or not. Despite this stirring of emotions, she entered, eyes taking in the unfamiliar hallway. It was dark, and there were no lights that she could see. The living room was visible from her position, and she noticed a crack in the window there. _I wonder if he caused that._ She stepped out of her ankle boots, and silently followed Kanda, who was leading the way, deeper inside. Silently, he gestured to the couch, and she sat down. Kanda sat opposite her. This caused her some discomfort, but it was to be expected. Kanda was always going to be the straight-forward type with these matters. It wasn't like him to dither about.

"You were going to say something?"

The stylist gulped. Come to think of it, she had been utterly unprepared. But she was going to take a shot and see where it got her. "I came to say goodbye. I heard from one of my seniors that you're thinking of working and staying in China long-term." When she had first received that information, she had been disappointed, yes, but not devastated or desperate in any way. And all of a sudden, she was, because it was reality. It wasn't a far-away possibility any more.

Kanda heaved a sigh after her sentence, gazing at her almost lazily. But those eyes were anything but lazy. "If that's it, you would have come tomorrow at the airport."

Lenalee had to admit defeat there, he was right. There was something else she wanted to say. "Yeah. I want to say some more."

He blinked – not of shock, but of a form of interest. "But you aren't going to say it depending on how I will take it."

That response sent an invisible jolt through her. Lenalee almost couldn't believe it. When had he known her so well? She nodded her head, still slightly unnerved, "Y-yes."

"What if I said that I would definitely not react negatively?"

That statement alone sent a surge of courage through Lenalee – perhaps, with this, she'd finally be able to voice what had been weighing on her mind, in the shadows for too long. She drew her gaze up to meet his – she was going to do her best and head straight forward.

* * *

Sorane felt burnt out, but then again, when was she not? They had been filming non stop for four hours now, and it looked like the director wasn't about to let everyone stop yet. _But then again, _Sorane noted as she gulped down some water, _it's always like this. The crazy schedules._ She heard someone's fast footsteps and a door slamming. _And the tantrums and crying after being scolded. _She stretched, staring at the ceiling as she did so. She wanted to see Allen. She didn't know what had happened after the fright Lavi gave her. _Why isn't Allen calling me or whatever? Is he just busy-_

Her phone was belting out the beginning tunes of Behind the Blue. She snatched it up, and upon seeing the caller ID, flipped it open immediately.

"Sorane-"

"Why didn't you call me earlier? You had me worrying about everything, The staff said there was some kind of emergency and you just kind of disappeared."

Allen kind of wished there that he hadn't called, but the more he put it off, the worse her reaction would get. "I'm sorry, it was an emergency. There was a lot of stuff to straighten out afterwards-"

"Allen. Are you free the day after tomorrow?" There was a hint of desperation as well as excitement in her voice.

"Yeah … why?" In truth, he didn't need to ask why.

Sorane seemed to share that thought, "I'm going to finish shopping in Shibuya 109 at around 2:00, so can we meet up then?"

Allen found her lack of consideration towards his schedule and personal opinions a little hurtful but he agreed – it was Sorane after all. He loved her for who she was, and he'd put up with the actress for a long time. "Sure. I'll meet you there." He had to withdraw the cell phone from his ear when she celebrated with an excited squeal. Another slightly irritating part of her.

"I can't wait as well – good luck on your job by the way, I hear things are going well?"

"Recording is still continuing – you know how it is."

Sorane nodded on her end of the line, "I do. I'm so glad I'm not a singer."

As they bid farewell, Allen wondered if her dislike towards that career was based on Miku's love for singing. _And to think she used to support her best friend whole-heartedly.

* * *

_

Lenalee felt like a massive weight had just been lifted off her. And even though this was a good thing, she also felt like throwing up or just fainting – so she could get away from the crazy stuff happening in front of her.

Kanda was staring at her. Well – staring was too simple a word. He looked as though he wanted to stare at her, but was forcing himself to stop. His blue eyes lingered on her features, and the atmosphere was strangely bright and yet, heavy. There was an incredible suspense layered over and over, upon itself all of a sudden. He drew a breath, reprocessing the past few moments.

* * *

"_I love you. I was an idiot for god knows how long and I never quite realised why … why I always wondered how you were doing, why I wanted to see you again, why I wanted to catch up to you …"

* * *

_

He couldn't remember a past girlfriend, another moment that had ever hit him quite as hard as this. How long had he been holding back stupidly? Wondering if this girl he treasured so much would come to love him, for the first time ever, he had been waiting. He didn't reach out and grab what would easily become his, this time. Why?

Kanda could find the answer easily enough.

He didn't want it to turn out like all those past relationships. This time, he truly cared. If she ever left his life, he'd never feel whole again.

_I sound cheesy._ But even as he thought that, in such a juvenile manner, it really was that way.

And it felt a billion times more than way when he smiled – something he rarely did – leaned forward, whispered the phrase he had been waiting so long to say and slowly drew her closer. As he caressed her black hair – formerly long, now short. All thanks to him. And as shallow the thought was, he aimed to get her to grow it long again.

* * *

Lenalee wanted this moment to last forever. She felt so incredibly safe in his embrace – it felt right, centred, stable. Everything seemed to fall into place at that moment. She took in his unique scent, felt his strong but gentle arms around her. She also wished, very hard, that there weren't any hesitant tears. They were starting to spill from their gathering point in her eyes, and she wanted badly not to cry – so that her vision would not be blurred. This crucial moment which she wanted to view, crystal clear, in her memory, for ever and ever.

But despite her wishes, her tears ended up streaming down her face, which Kanda saw in plain view when he pulled away slightly. His blue eyes studied her teary brown ones, slightly questioning but they steadily came to an understanding.

Lenalee broke down into slight, quiet sobs, illuminated only by the faint light streaming through the cracked glass and white curtains. "I'm sorry."

Kanda kissed her lightly on her forehead, still holding her as they stood in his living room. "Don't be sorry."

They both knew it. All was well.

_The snow would fall and pile up,_

_The rain would fall and wash away,_

_Their pains and joys,_

_Hesitant raindrops would hang on leaves,_

_Memories would stay swirling in the water,_

_All was well in this little universe,_

_All was well …_

**A/N - thank you, thank you, thank you for the reviews and favs, thank you so much! I'm sorry this chapter took a while to write. It was quite difficult working with Kanda, who I always seem to have trouble writing with. I hope to improve in future =] and once again, thanks to everyone for the support! I hope to continue writing and to improve along the way =]**


	21. Chapter 21 Introductory Smile

Diamond Rose

Chapter 21

Introductory Smile

Outside of work, Miku looked like the most ordinary girl possible. She wore caps and earmuffs depending on the weather. She liked fingerless gloves. She liked leather jackets and kitten heels. Her collection of skinny jeans appeared to be endless. If she could, she'd constantly be decked out in those clothes. It was too bad that her job called for something completely different. Sometimes it was just too girly. Sometimes it was rokku-kei (which is pretty cool). But today it was something Miku didn't like at all.

Gothic Lolita.

When she had first been contacted by her manager about the job, she had nearly dropped the sandwich she had been eating. Gothic Lolita was not the type of clothing Miku eagerly got dressed in for a photoshoot. It was the type of clothing which she'd prefer to rip into a million shreds.

So obviously, as she walked down the seemingly endless row of lacy, frilly clothing, she wished that it would suddenly start pouring outside so they'd have to postpone the shoot. As the stylist stopped and pulled out a cutesy, black number, Miku drew another deep breath as she took in the amount of lace around the sleeves and under the chiffon skirt. She drew another breath as she questioned the stylist. "How long is the skirt?" She really didn't want to stare and try to judge for herself.

The stylist "hm"ed for a second before answering the singer in an unnervingly cheerful manner, "It's above the knee – mini."

Miku consulted her clothes preferences. She got rather self-conscious in anything 7cm above the knee. She knew because she had actually taken a ruler and measured before. Back when Sorane used to force her into various casual dresses and skirts when they got free time in the city. Back then. As she followed the stylist out of the closet, she nearly whacked herself for thinking about it. Sorane was the least of her worries today. Sorane wasn't even that bad a person in comparison to the other bitches (especially the models) in the industry. _She was just so special. It was painful to find that link cut all of a sudden.

* * *

_

Lavi was staring at a billboard that had his and Miku's face plastered across it. A few metres down the road, there was a commercial playing on five screens that featured Miku's solo B-Side. She was advertising some kind of perfume that he knew that Miku actually hated. Miku didn't wear perfume if she could avoid it. If there was any scent that she did wear – she stuck with women's deodorant and the unavoidable faint whiff of sakura-scented shampoo in her hair. Sometimes it made Lavi wonder how much care she put into her hair. It was quite obvious she washed it every day. With the same brand of shampoo. _I think,_ he noted with an awkward grin, _my nose is quite sensitive now_. It was funny what love could do to a person.

He happened to remind himself of that fact again as he laid green gaze on the lyrics. Miku's normally neat handwriting was unnaturally slanted and messy as she penned certain notes in the columns. Hastily-drawn arrows pointed out trickier parts of the song he needed to work on. And at the very bottom of every page, she had drawn a rabbit with the same phrase coming from its mouth in a speech bubble.

"Ganbatte!"

The red head smiled as he touched that rabbit on the first sheet of paper. He knew that she probably didn't have any romantic intentions behind the small show of affection but one could hope.

One could hope.

_What is it that I could do?_

_Something to make you smile,_

_Something to make your world,_

_Seem so much brighter,_

_I just want to make you happy,_

_In my silly, selfish way …_

Miku sat on the bench next to the cat they had brought in. It was a chocolate Somali. Its amber eyes had stared at her curiously when its handler first brought it over. She had been told to look at the sky – not to tilt her head fully up, but to let her eyes drift upwards. This was easy enough. Miku kept a light smile on her face and freely studied the clouds lingering in the sky. Her ears picked up the clicks, her eyes noticed the flashes. They didn't really get to her any more. She had settled into a routine. Besides, this time, she didn't have to pout or smile into the camera. When she heard the yell of the director, she grinned wider, looking down from the sky. She turned to study the cat which was being distracted by its handler.

And it in turn, looked up to study her. Miku was fascinated, she loved animals but she had never had a chance to actually care for one – own one. Its amber eyes were captivating. They were opened wide, they blinked once or twice occasionally, but they maintained a watchful feel. She wondered if animals thought intelligently – kept their own opinions regarding certain people or other animals they met. Maybe cats didn't get along with dogs because they just couldn't understand one another. As her train of thought continued on, she wondered if they enjoyed living with people. Her thoughts were interrupted when the handler spoke to her.

"Kawaguchi-san, do you want to meet Tim?"

Miku blinked, "Tim?"

The handler smiled brightly, nodding, "Yes, his name is Timcampy, we all call him Tim though! So, would you like to meet him?"

"Ah, um … yes, I would like to meet him." Why was she nervous? Ah yes – first interaction with a cat. Ever.

Timcampy seemed to have caught on to what the handler said, and wasted no time in picking himself up and taking a few steps nearer to her on the bench. His amber eyes were studying her left hand now – she was wearing a charm bracelet.

Miku slowly reached across, and to her delight, Timcampy sniffed her hand, before bypassing that and tentatively nudging one of the charms on her bracelet with a golden-furred paw. Miku nearly giggled and raised her arm a little, encouraging a small game. Tim obliged, trying to nudge the same charm. At that point, the game was interrupted when the stylist rushed up.

"Please don't let the cat damage-"

"It's okay, Tim isn't scratching the bracelet." Miku was defending a cat. A strange, new experience.

The stylist shrugged and started to walk away on her stilettos – a pet hate of Miku's

Miku returned to petting Timcampy, lost in her little world, enjoying her short break to the absolute fullest. The cool breeze that travelled by, the distant buzz of voices and traffic some way away from them, everything seemed so fitting. It was perfect. She didn't even mind the black and white lacy dress and lace-up boots set. Somehow, she had just gained a little sanctuary.

Unknown to her, the main photographer had noticed the warm atmosphere, and captured the moment with a quiet shutter noise.

* * *

Allen picked up the thick envelope on his desk. There was a short note from Miku's manager – rare gesture from the busy woman.

_They sent over the photos from the CROSS ANGEL Shibuya 109 shoot!_

_I was thinking that it'd be good if you showed them to Lee-san as well – Miku's request._

_Please remember to return them to me in a week [09.10.2010]_

Allen dropped the note and drew out the A4-sized glossy prints from within. And with all honesty, they amazed him – and he wasn't being biased.

The first shot was one of her walking down the road – taken from the front. There was a good view of the sidewalk, and there were people in the background. She was dressed in gothic Lolita – as expected. A black beaded hairband was settled in her hair, the white, lacy blouse was coupled with a red ribbon around the collar. She wore a knee-length ruffled black skirt – delicate white beading decorated the edge. Miku was walking in simple black flats, a cheerful grin on her features, her blue eyes looked directly at the camera.

There was a new confidence there that Allen had seen in months. Her blue eyes were filled with a new happiness, and her smile was pure – as real as a magazine photoshoot could produce. He ran his hand across her glossy, 2D features. He felt strangled with two sets of emotions. One half was joyful – happy to see that his friend was improving mentally and emotionally, but the other half wasn't as comfortable; questioning exactly how genuine the change was, and whether or not he accepted this new Miku. It was this concept of "new" that made him feel uncomfortable.

Perhaps he would discuss it with Lenalee or Sorane. And even though he considered, Allen knew that the probability of that discussion ever occurring with either one was near nil. He never discussed Miku with others. It was almost like a pet hate after one incident in the Rainbow Star Agency. Just one, highly significant incident.

As Allen thought back to that particular incident, he frowned. Just thinking back to that incidient sent a slight chill down his spine.

"But," he told himself as he withdrew another A4 print from the envelope, "that is a memory I shall dwell on another time." He decided as he held up the next photo up.

It was a particularly heart-warming photo. The lighting was warm and Miku's face, turned away from the camera showed an all-natural, pleasurable expression. She was playing with the long-haired cat, gently fondling one of its ears as her mouth parted a fraction as she nearly laughed. As Allen stared at the photo, he wondered if it really was something staged. It seemed much to genuine and touching to be staged.

Was it possible to stage such a beautiful scene?

He stood, still holding the photo, and began to head to the scanner in the main office. He knew he wasn't supposed to scan it, but he was sure he'd be able to get away with it. Allen might not be the best of friends with Lavi, but he knew how to cheer the guy up.

Plus, a photo like that? It was meant to be shared with everyone.

_Your new, radiant smile,_

_Your steady, confident gaze,_

_Steadily, you are growing more perfect,_

_Maybe one day,_

_You'd be totally out of reach …_

**A/N - haha~ yes, Timcampy is a cat ^_^ I guess the story just won't be quite right without him, eh? I hope you enjoyed this chapter! And you know where the "Review" button is =]**


	22. Chapter 22 Your Rhythm

Diamond Rose

Chapter 22

Your Rhythm

Miku nearly threw herself onto the three beanbags provided by the record company. Normally singing didn't use up much of her energy, but a straight-out recording session sometimes took it out of her. She sighed as she rolled over on the beanbags, completely ignorant of how messy her hair had instantly become. It was just a recording session. She was seventeen – still a minor, so she didn't have the issue of _needing_ to look like a professional adult. She blew a strand of hair out of her face, _At least, not until I'm nineteen. _As she thought this, a familiar figure approached her from behind, and before she could roll off, firm hands suddenly reached out – sending a tickling sensation. "GAH!"

A few staff members turned around, but upon seeing the scene, just laughed and returned to their breaks. It was none other than Lavi that had "zapped" her. He was chuckling as he sat cross-legged in front of her on the floor. "Sorry to spoil your fun."

Miku grinned, shaking her head as she sat up on the beanbag, "I was relaxing – not having fun."

"Ah, forgive me for ruining your rest time."

Miku didn't really like how he spoke to her as though she was several years younger than she actually was, but she let it slide. It was Lavi's way of showing his friendly adoration. "Don't worry."

The red head studied her for a second before moving on to a new topic. "How were-"

The singer felt that she should have seen this coming. "Oh no, please don't talk about it! I felt horridly self-conscious-"

Lavi rolled his eyes in an obnoxious manner, "Oh gee, you'd feel so normal and at ease with cameras and people's eyes pointed in your direction."

Miku couldn't help smiling at that display of sarcasm. "Haha, yeah. But don't you feel totally normal and –"

"Right, just because I used to get subjected to it on a daily basis, I am totally fine with it." There was a slightly irritated glint in his eye – the one not covered with a floppy fringe of red hair.

"Oh … sorry." She felt so crap now – perhaps she shouldn't have brought up his main line of work – modelling. "But … do you actually have something really wrong with it?" Miku didn't understand that one could have been forced into the industry, not willingly allowed in like she had been.

A dark look crossed his features. He sighed as he looked at her in his steady, direct way – the manner effectively made Miku squirm inside. "I didn't get into the biz because I wanted to." This look was promptly vanished by his smile the next second, "It's still enjoyable though. Especially now."

That simple statement made Miku's heart race at a ridiculous degree of speed. She didn't know how to reply, and was thankfully rescued by her manager's call to order them back to work. Back to recording, back to singing out her emotions and pouring them into the microphone.

* * *

Ayumu didn't understand what the hell was going on with his life. At any rate, he didn't really want his sister's agency knocking on the door and asking about him. That pissed him off. It wasn't that he disliked his sister's career choice – but more that the certain career choice had deprived him of a sister and mother, and his father was also involved in the industry, leaving him a lot of freedom in the world, but nobody to spend it with. So as he frowned at the woman standing at the door, he really wished that she could hurry up and disappear in a puff of smoke. He didn't fucking need fame and whatever else they were offering him. He just wanted a life. A life that didn't consist of dodging tabloids and overworking yourself. "What do you want?"

The blonde woman smiled as she removed her sunglasses, "I want to talk to you. Is your father home?"

Ayumu scowled as he noted the use of 'father' and not 'parents'. Of course the agency would know. Especially when his father's name had been plastered next to their mothers for a large period of time. "No, he isn't. He'll be home at ten."

She looked at him in a concerned way – Ayumu didn't like that. He hated being pitied, hated being looked down upon in any way. "Alright." She withdrew a card from her bag and handed it to him, "I won't talk to you without your father's permission, but take my contact details – please hold on to it." She seemed to read his mind.

And she turned and left. Just like that.

Ayumu looked down at the business card that he had been handed.

Lulu Bell

**Flight Records**

_Wait … what the hell – she isn't from Rainbow Star. Why would Miku's record company be scouting me this way?_ He sighed as he slammed the front door closed and stalked back inside. A second later, the bell rang again. "URGH." He went back, wrenching the door open – to find Ren standing there, holding a steaming chocolate croissant. He had been to the local bakery.

He grinned broadly, "Hi, Ayu-chan. I saw some blonde chick leaving, is she your girl-"

Ayumu nearly slapped him, "Stop screwing around. She came from Flight Records."

Ren blinked. "Okay," and invited himself inside while Ayumu slammed the door a second time in 30 seconds. "You know, why would they be scouting you?" He was chewing as he spoke.

"Don't eat and talk at the same time."

"Blah." Ren rolled his eyes, "Don't avoid the subject."

Ayumu shrugged as he left the business card on the kitchen table, "I don't know and I don't want to know. Why can't they just leave me alone?"

Ren plonked himself down on the couch, brown eyes directed at the ceiling. "My mother used to be a model."

This was entirely new information. "WHAT?"

"Mhm." He took another bite from the chocolate croissant. "She got blacklisted by the industry around twenty years ago." Ren kept thinking, "Ah wait … it's twelve years."

Ayumu cocked an eyebrow, "And how is this relevant?"

Ren grinned, "I may know why they want you."

"I don't care."

His friend just shrugged, "Whatever. Let Miku lose her job. It's all okay-"

"WHAT?"

"I'm just saying that if they really want you to boost their income, they're going to do anything to get you in. If you don't they carry out the threats. That's what happened to my mother, only I think she doesn't really care about it anymore. She's happy as a photography professor at uni."

While Ren jabbered on about unimportant details, Ayumu was trying to absorb the truth. A part of him refused to believe, and tried to shrug it off as an impossibility, an anecdote that would not apply to him. But the more sensible and accepting part of him, deep down, buried beneath piles of insecurity, already knew that that must have been the case, that it was the case. And that made him feel really screwed up.

* * *

It seemed that it was finally Sorane's turn to get scolded. The reason being poor acting. What else? "Ohayou Himawari-Chan" was one of the weirdest named dramas possible. Well, Sorane had actually heard weirder.

Himawari-Chan's heroine was played by an actress whose name was … well. Himawari Konugi. She was pretty, But her acting skills truly were … mediocre. Personally, Sorane felt that she would have been able to play the role better. Why she had been stuck as the sidekick, later on, traitor, she wasn't very happy with, but also understood why. It was name recognition. Despite her past dramas, all having achieved excellent viewer ratings, she was still somewhat minor. Himawari on the other hand, had participated in two Korean dramas, had 6 Japanese dramas and 3 movies under her belt. Ask every third person on the street, and they'd have at least heard of her name. Why Sorane hadn't achieved that yet was a mystery.

Sorane was jolted back from her contemplation with a stern male voice – one she wasn't particularly fond of, but had to respect. "Akira doesn't exert an air of confidence – at least, not much more than Himawari. You're injecting a character into her, that isn't her."

Sorane nodded, not bothered with backchat. In the acting biz, the director was always right, and you acted in accordance with what the director wants. If you didn't comply or produce results quickly enough, either you got fired or your job got so much more difficult. Simple. "Okay. I'll work on it."

After seeing that the scolding was over, and she was no longer required, she turned tail and stalked to the rooftop. That made her think. Lavi had left, and straight afterwards, the incident had occurred. Sorane didn't like how it was Miku's fault, and two, it disturbed the filming process. Not so much that it disturbed her, but more than an unnaturally large amount of effort was placed in finding her. _Well, sure, a singer just doesn't skip out onto the street. It just doesn't happen. It shouldn't happen. Not when she's working._ And that thought made Sorane wonder.

She held so much dislike, so much hate for Miku, steadily built up throughout the years. And finally, they'd exploded and they were no longer friends. But there was the part of her that was aware of the good things about Miku – her perserverence, her dedication to everything she did. And when Sorane thought about it, it just wasn't like Miku to run out just because she was tired and wasn't needed. If Miku had a job, she stuck to it. Sorane had to admit, that part of the girl was pretty commendable.

_When I think of you,_

_I think of the past,_

_Of times I can't go back to,_

_Times when all was great,_

_You've moved on,_

_I've tried as well,_

_And you've managed so much better,_

_I guess that's why …_

_Why I hate you so much._


	23. Chapter 23 Pressing Rewind

Diamond Rose

Chapter 23

Pressing Rewind

Some people downright hated their jobs. Some people loved what they did for a living. And then the rest just didn't really care or weren't sure. Sorane was stuck in that category. She was stuck, she wanted to move to the second category, but for some reason, she was totally incapable.

So on that Friday night, with her digital clock displaying a tentative _11:36 PM_ she thought about herself. Why had she wanted to get into acting at all? Why? That passion she used to have for acting was so distant. It was like a memory. She couldn't bring herself to feel that way again. And it was interfering with her work. She needed that passion; she wanted to regain it. If she couldn't, she was never going to move up in the biz, she'd never be allowed out either.

It was the type of passion that Miku had, and she used to have.

That fact alone made her feel horrid.

She closed her eyes, sinking into her beanbag, brown hair spread out over her shoulders, totally messed up. But she didn't care and no one else in the house cared as long as she didn't go outside looking like that. She dived through the sea of memories; both good and bad, and tried to find the beginning. The opening credits. The black screen before the opening credits. Where had it begun?

* * *

It began when Sorane was four. Brown-haired, brown-eyed and adorable in general. But no really mind-blowing in any way. Her personality, to put it bluntly, was downright boring. But she was four years old, for god's sake, a normal human being would have just let it slide. She was four, goddammit.

But Aimi Takashi was not going to treat her daughter like that. Her daughter was going to be the best. The absolute best. She was settling for nothing less than the best. And that stemmed from a meeting with a friend of her's.

Who else but Tomoko Kawaguchi, a.k.a Chito K. The singer that belted out the epic ballads with all her heart, put so much energy into rock songs and experimented constantly with R&B. The girl who rocked the country straight out of high school. Now married to a fairly successful film director, she had a daughter. Miku Kawaguchi.

Aimi had been curious from the very beginning, Miku had been born in the same year as Sorane, and there was an abnormally large amount of news coverage. It was as though the country's eyes were watching her, tracking her, eager to see her grow up, eager to see if she would walk down the path her mother had. Would Miku be another trailblazer? Would she become a national treasure? Another gem? The model/actress wanted to know, just like the rest of the nation. After all, it was Tomoko Kawaguchi's daughter. Great things were expected.

So that day rolled around, where Tomoko came over to visit, bringing along four year old Miku.

Aimi had been shocked into oblivion. Miku was almost a replica of her mother. The most striking features were the eyes; a brilliant, vibrant, deep blue like her mother's. Her skin was pale, flawless. The main difference was the hair. She hadn't inherited the light brown hair of Tomoko, instead, she had taken on Hayate's thicker, richer hair. A slight fringe flopped over her forehead, and the rest bounced around her chin – combed, but still not quite straight. Natural curls – slight, but they were there. And that was just her appearance. Upon exchanging some short, simple greetings with the four year old, Aimi soon discovered a fascinating personality.

Miku was not Tomoko. Tomoko was the endlessly cheerful, confident and positive-thinking girl. Tomoko bravely took steps that normal people would think twice about or ten million times about. Tomoko used her thinking time wisely, and used a hundred times more the energy in actually doing something. It was this brave, energetic, passionate Tomoko that had made so many people fall in love and look up to her.

Miku on the other hand, did not appear to be that way. The four year old smiled sweetly, she was the epitome of the nice girl; your best friend. But she didn't seem to contain the bravery and simple energy that Tomoko had. She seemed to double check everything she was about to do. She seemed the type that often chickened out of asking a simple question because it might make her look bad. That type. The self-protective type. And yet, that was still the incorrect description. It would have been more accurate to say that Miku was almost never entirely sure about herself but not always because she was concerned about her self-image. It seemed that she was so doubtful for her mother – for the sake of others. The selfless, nice girl.

And after making those observations, Aimi glanced back at her own daughter; brown haired, brown eyed, not really brilliant at all. She couldn't help feeling those familiar feelings of exasperation and disappointment.

And deep down, Aimi was blaming herself. On the outside though, she vowed to push Sorane to become the best in the business.

She'd do anything. She wasn't going to lose; not even when it came to her daughter's success.

_Wishes, endless desires,_

_Pushed upon those who never wanted them,_

_Pushed upon the unwilling who had no choice,_

_Somehow, on that misleading road,_

_Someone had a change of heart …_

She inserted the key into the lock, turned it clockwise like she always did, and stepped inside the house, totally unsure of what to expect. As it turned out Miku had never been aware of any type of routine. Her family just didn't have one. Miku didn't know if she was supposed to be upset about that. Even so, she had expectations. It was Friday night, so she expected Ayumu to be reading a book, curled up on the couch. She didn't know about her father. She had never known all that much. However, it made her smile when she heard about his latest drama's great viewer ratings. Another success under his belt.

Only when Miku turned the doorknob and stepped inside, she was greeted by a scene that she had not been expecting. At all.

Ayumu was listening to music on the _stereo_.

Ayumu never listened to music on the stereo. It was always through headphones.

Miku dropped her bag on the couch as she walked forward to Ayumu, standing in front of the sound system, "Ayu-"

He had turned off the music, and turned to face her, smiling. It was a normal smile. He always greeted Miku with it. "Yes?"

Miku shook her head, "Nothing." She took a breath, composing herself. Surely nothing was wrong. Nothing at all … "Is dad home?"

Ayumu shook his head, "He called though. Said he'll be running late today. I haven't eaten yet." He pointed to the kitchen table. "I made some basic stuff."

Miku felt extremely blessed that she had such a wonderful brother.

* * *

Lavi stared at the photocopied image that Allen had sent him. It had been copied onto glossy photo paper, and he silently wondered if Allen was purposely breaking some rules to show him this. But either way, he was extremely grateful.

Looking at the photograph from a professional angle, Lavi applauded the effort put into it. The setting was well chosen; the lighting excellent but he doubted that the scene had been staged. He had seen Miku in front of the camera lens. She was uncomfortable most of the time, she couldn't smile genuinely enough – when she was asked to, she ended up generating the cutesy effect that just wasn't her. Acting cool and distant was in her comfort zone; however, the shoots she ended up getting invited to didn't ask for that side of her. The public wanted cutesy, fun, sweet Miku. Which she was enough of the time, normally, but she just wasn't in front of the camera.

So Lavi wondered how she had pulled off that shot so well. Unless, he noted, that it wasn't staged. Perhaps at that moment – she had actually been enjoying herself.

He grinned, amused at the thought, It was so not Miku; enjoying herself in front of a camera. But as he kept studying the image, basking in her gentle smile – nearly a laugh, he had to give credit to that cat she was petting.

It wasn't easy to get Miku to enjoy herself in front of others. From what he knew, Miku liked the small things. She liked to sit in a park alone and think, she liked to chat to one person across the table while sipping hot chocolate, and she liked to watch the clouds swirl and race across the sky. The simple, small things that a lot of people in the world just wouldn't have time for. That they would miss. You didn't [normally] find those small things in front of others – in the crowds.

But somehow, Miku had discovered a small thing, in front of the camera.

Lavi stared at that photo for longer as he lay down on the loveseat in the hotel room.

And then he started to wonder; was giving a random present to someone in July weird?

So he thought some more.

Twenty minutes later, he got up, turned on his laptop, started researching as well as calling people.

_I vow never to take you for granted,_

_You make up a massive part of my heart,_

_You take up so much of my mind,_

_I simply can't stop thinking of you,_

_You're definitely everything I ever wanted._


	24. Chapter 24 Blue Soundfiles

Diamond Rose

Chapter 24

Blue Soundfiles

Sorane never expected that she was going to be the type of girl who cared so much about her appearance. She had always been careful, yes, but not overly obsessive about the state of her hair, or if her legs looked fat in the short shorts she was wearing. Never had she walked down a street, and stared at every reflective surface, checking if she looked okay.

But that was exactly what she was doing today.

Every single shop window, she checked her hair, her clothes. Every single reflective surface. Every rare mirror. Every window. She checked. Sorane herself was uncomfortable with the sudden obsession, but didn't it stem from how worried she was about how she looked? How Allen would see her? Would he approve of her?

It was these, simple, innocent worries that drove her to this highly self-conscious behaviour.

As it turned out [and it was expected], Allen was punctual. In fact, he was early. He waved when he spotted Sorane through the crowd of people. Sorane wasn't as nearly as composed as Allen was. She waved back, and broke into a run – at least, as fast as possible she could go, squeezing in between randoms on the street until she was face to face with him. "Allen."

The guy in question smiled, "You look pretty today, Sorane." And he was happy to find that he wasn't lying. Not that he had ever needed to.

In response to that, an involuntary blush rushed up to Sorane's cheeks, colouring them a shell pink.

Allen noted that change in her and grinned; somewhat out of triumph, but also because he was happy that … he had made her happy. "Anyway, where are we going?"

"Well." Sorane looked around, "I actually didn't plan anything."

"Woah. Really?"

She had to laugh at that response, "Yes, really. I didn't plan anything."

Allen wasn't sure exactly how to take that. He had always seen Sorane as the organised type. She knew what she wanted, what she was doing. And all of a sudden; perhaps it was because it was him, she didn't know what she wanted to do. "Then," he said, as he reached and took her hand in his, "how does a trip to a certain studio sound?" Allen was going to be Allen. He dabbled in music.

This invitation was new to Sorane. The actress had never been in a recording studio, let alone near one. Maybe it was curiosity that drove her. Maybe it was something else, but she simply had to agree.

* * *

Allen wasn't exactly sure of what he was doing. Or to be specific, why he had chosen this activity. Though, the only thing that was making him ask the question was because the studio was owned by none other than Cross Marian. And while he had a spare key, the security guards were bound to report to him.

But everything was going to be fine, it wasn't like anything was going to be broken while he was in there. Allen basically spent half his life in a recording studio. The other half was in front of a piano, with hundreds of blank score sheets set out before him. And a billion pens.

With this silly thought lingering on his mind, he inserted the key and twisted it, allowing the door to swing open. He gestured for Sorane to enter first, and she did, a smile on her face. She was most definitely curious, but she was tentative as well. She was an actress, it was beyond strange for her to be in a recording studio at all. Let alone, possibly _use_ one. The childish part of her wanted badly to figure out what all those switches did, how the whole place w_orked_. And then there was the tentative part of her, unnerved at being here at all. It wasn't right, really. The whole place wasn't meant to coexist with her – she wasn't supposed to be here. Besides, the whole place reeked of Miku. It was just the place she'd love to be in. She forced her thoughts to stop there. That was a kink to work out later.

Sorane snapped back to reality when she heard Allen's voice. "Come on, Sorane. I'll show you the works."

In that instant, all her worries and uncertainties disappeared. Temporarily or not, she wasn't sure, but they were gone. That was relief enough. There was a smile on her face as she stepped next to him, staring at the pages and pages spread out before him. "What is it?"

Allen pulled out a page and handed it to her. "You are going to sing a song."

She didn't know if she was supposed to be excited or happy. What she did know though, was that she was going to try. Try something she tried once and failed at. So she reached out and took the sheet from Allen's hand. Sorane stepped over to the door that lead to that spot behind the glass. That place where she had never dared to step in. That quiet, soundless place that she had no right to.

And an innocent, helpless voice in her head asked, over and over. _Why wasn't Allen stopping her? Why couldn't she stop?_ The answer came to her swiftly, and Sorane nearly stopped to question whether or not she needed to start seeing a therapist. _I'm going to try and live._

She placed the lyrics in front of her, on the stand, took the headphones that had been prepared and slipped them on.

* * *

Ayumu was shaking. It wasn't the chilly weather that was starting to flutter by at the end of August. It was the undeniable fact that he was standing in front of Flight Records, Lulu Bell's business card deep in his pocket. He wasn't about to commit himself to that life his sister, mother and father had integrated themselves into. At least, he didn't want to. Ayumu was here, first and foremost to find out why he was being dragged into the storm. And how he could protect his sister from getting dragged in deeper. It may have been shallow, stupid thinking, the wonderings and hopes of a naïve child.

But it was a child that was quite willing to do anything to protect his sister.

He took a deep breath and strode forwards, entering the building, automatic doors parting to quietly announce his arrival. His heart seemed to be super-charged as he strode to the desk. The hand he pressed against the marble top seemed unnaturally cold; his senses seemed to be hyper-alert. His voice was felt weird – it echoed in an unnatural environment.

"I'm here to see Lulu Bell."

The woman at the desk raised an eyebrow as she consulted the computer sitting beside her, "Name?"

"Kawaguchi – Ayumu Kawaguchi." He didn't know why he felt certain that he'd be allowed in. It wasn't as though he had an appointment. Surely the Bell woman wouldn't have-

"Ah." She turned to face him again, "You are one lucky person. Bell-san is coming down to see you."

Bewildered for a second, he questioned her, "Coming down? Surely I could go up –"

"Company protocol, you can't go unattended, besides, Bell-san was quite eager to see you."

And as though on cue, the elevator doors hissed open, revealing Lulu. Her blond hair was tied in a ponytail with a lilac ribbon, and she was wearing a midnight blue suit. The smile on her face sent shivers down Ayumu's spine, yet he didn't know why.

"Ayumu-san, how nice to see you."

"You don't need to speak to me with an honorific." As nervous as he was, it seemed he could still maintain a fairly casual vibe. Of course, no smile.

"Okay then, Ayumu. Let's go upstairs to my office, I assume you have _many _questions."

"Yeah." Of course, he had more than many. Only, a lot were ones that he'd have to answer himself.

* * *

Sorane ran a finger down the page, reading the lyrics. They were familiar. Very familiar.

_There the sound of the wind echoes again and everyone seems to plant new seeds,__  
__Reciting ancient poems at the wall's remains,_

_Waves that crash over the riverbanks, what do you lament? In order to keep the names of the__ p__eople who remain separated from disappearing, wrap up your grief now and let's forgive,_

It was such a sad song. Surely she'd be able to recall a song like that. It was on the edges of her mind – she couldn't recall it. The title was right there – on the page – _Kuon no Kawa_. As she nodded to Allen, indicating that she was ready, she kept thinking, before being hit with the memorable instrumental – and the memories came flooding back, as she tried to sing, voice shaky.

Allen was concerned that he had done something wrong. He knew the song. Miku had sung it in a solo performance when she was fourteen – it was a Christmas concert. She had been severely flamed afterwards, for she had switched from the cheery Christmas love song to this deep, touching ballad without notifying the organising staff. She had been banned from the New Year's performance as punishment. But that wasn't really the reason Allen remembered it. He remembered if because Miku had sung it, tears streaming from her eyes as she brought forth one of her best performances.

Why she had been crying – he had never understood it. And perhaps a stupid, selfish part of him was trying to figure it out by getting Sorane to sing it. He knew that they still shared a bond, despite the recent, illogical split in the earth. But the caring side of him was not concerned with Miku today. Today, he wanted to help Sorane in whatever way possible, and free her from the chains that stopped her from flying. Today, he was taking steps to show this frightened girl that he loved, that she could do things she never dreamed of. That it was possible. That living truly wasn't as hard as it had seemed to her.

* * *

Miku stared at the email. It was hard to believe. On the surface, it was perfectly normal, and totally regular. There had been nothing to be scared of. After all, it had been titled: **Schedule – 28.08.2010**. But when she clicked it open and prepared to print it out, her blue eyes widened before she slammed both hands down on the table. Thankfully, she was currently alone in the house. "No. No. No." She reread it. She pinched herself and then reread it. So it wasn't a nightmare. Because clearly, staring at her in the face was:

_6:45 AM – main office / day schedule overview_

_7:00 AM – recording [final]_

_9:30 AM – Music Station rehearsal_

_2:00 PM – Music Station Live performance_

_3:45 PM – voice training_

_5:30 PM – debut concert planning session [1]_

_7:00 PM – press conference preparations_

_9:30 PM – visit set_

_10:25 PM - ONLY STAR interview_

_11:20 PM - ONLY STAR photo shoot_

_12:45 AM – sales meeting –end-_

Miku felt like crying and screaming in rage. Almost all days were busy, but this was really pushing it. By her calculations, she would get 3 hours of sleep. It was true – that was the norm, it was expected. Everyone in the business coped with those working hours. But the seventeen-year-old just couldn't help blowing up at this particular day. At least, she pointed out to herself, she would be able to blow off the steam during the Music Station rehearsal and in between sites.

She stood, stretching, and studying the clock. It displayed 11:45PM in glowing red digital numbers. It was time to crash for 5 hours before getting up to look decent. After all, it was just like Sorane had always said. You had to maintain the raw material for the make up artists to work on.

_Every single day,_

_Spent facing our fears,_

_Sometimes we get nowhere,_

_Rarely, do we overcome them,_

_But that five seconds,_

_It's a moment I won't forget,_

_Ever …_


	25. Chapter 25 Neko to Usagi

Diamond Rose

Chapter 25

Neko to Usagi

Lavi kept staring at the brown bundle, sleeping in the basket, surrounded by blankets. It was true that it probably was a foolish way to travel, but he was fairly sure that the cat wouldn't be waking up anytime soon. Besides, he'd just charm the cat – it worked on women, surely it would work on cats. Okay, so maybe his logic was off.

He glanced at the clock. 5:55 AM, Time to get moving.

Miku closed the door behind her as she stepped out. Her hastily-combed hair was suppressed by a cap – a fuzzy scarf had been thrown around her neck. It was cold in mornings, and at the same time, it made her feel comforted. This routine, she was used to it. Nothing would go wrong.

She was reassuring herself.

* * *

Ayumu woke early. He stared at the ceiling, replaying the events of yesterday. It was a weekend, so in a way, he was fortunate to have an entire day to dwell on it – but at the same time, he didn't want to.

"_You're asking why I scouted you?"_

"_Yes. My name doesn't normally pop up in your circles. I can guess."_

"_You are the legendary Chito K.'s son. We were going to want to snatch you up one day. If it wasn't us, it'd be someone else."_

"_Aren't you betting too much on my family?"_

"_Ayumu, are you doubting your abilities?"_

"_I'm not musically talented."_

"_You underestimate the range of our scouts. We visited your school once. An open day. Don't you remember performing?"_

"_I sang one verse in my friend's band and played seven chords."_

"_That was quite enough for us to determine your worth."_

_That left a foul taste on Ayumu's mouth for some reason._

"_You don't have the brilliance of your mother, and your sister can easily best you, I grant you that. But Flight Records, we always try to give to the public what they want." Here, she gestured to him, "I don't deny that you have the looks and girls will be falling head-over-heels for you if you debuted."_

"_I don't care about them."_

"_Ah. Then what if I said that Miku might suddenly lose a lot of job offers, and her project funding would be dropped."_

"_You're blackmailing me."_

_The smirk on her features was really unnerving him now. "Mhm."_

"_Has my father been contacted regarding this?"_

"_Yes, he has. He will go along with your decision."_

"_You told him that same-"_

"_Yes. Now, your decision?"_

"_I-I'll think about it."_

_Then there was that smirk again._

Ayumu squeezed his eyes shut, mind whirling in confusion. He didn't want this. He didn't want to live like Miku – a life of cameras and less sleep. Why couldn't he be normal? He had been trying so hard to be normal for so long. He was getting dragged into the storm.

* * *

Lavi was feeling very worried. Keeping the cat secret was proving extremely difficult. He had asked one of the recording staff to take care of it – out of Miku's sight. Right now, he was sure it was being fed. Miku was being distracted in front of him.

"Morning, Lavi." Damn, the smile was irresistible.

Being the gentlemanly playboy that he was, he returned the gesture, "Good morning to you as well."

Miku took a sip from her cup of steaming hot chocolate before replying, "You look really relaxed."

"Mmm. Is that a bad thing?"

She shrugged, gulping down the last of her drink, "I don't care how you feel as long as we pull off a decent performance today. Besides, we should have an accomplished feeling right now."

Lavi lifted one eyebrow, curious. "Why is that?" He had a feeling that he already knew the answer.

Miku rolled her eyes, throwing her arms up in the air, "Look, we finished recording an album! Don't you feel –"

"Yes, I do." There was a light-hearted glow about his smile, and his green eye had an almost cocky glint to it. But it wasn't the obnoxious, negative type of cocky; it was the adorable, funny type. "It's the first time I've ever-"

"Gotcha." She was grinning hugely, the sense of accomplishment she felt was incredible and she was ridiculously happy that he shared that emotion. Miku wondered if all her idols felt like this at the final recording session. Every single one of the ten tracks had taken hours to perfect, and suddenly, every single moment was totally worth it. Every frustrating note, every melody that didn't feel right on the first go. All that hard work. All those water bottles. All so worthwhile in the end. She leaned back, looking at the stark white ceiling, her voice coming out quiet, "My dream came true. An album. Our debut album. My debut album."

Lavi watched her from across the table, smiling. It was taking so much effort to restrain from standing up, going to her side and embracing her. That happiness that emanated from her was utterly infectious, as was her smile. He didn't dare disrupt that smile though – literally and figuratively. He just wanted to treasure that smile. Before he ran out of time and wouldn't be able to see it anymore. He seemed to have so much and so little of it – time. "I hope my voice was up to scratch." A light chuckle from him followed the statement.

Miku straightened up to sit properly in the chair, and looked at him, straight on. The blue eyes seemed to have a certain type of intensity to them. A smile stayed on her features as she spoke – complimented him, in fact. "Lavi. You were fantastic. I can name people better, but for your first time as a professional singer. You are awesome, really amazing." She took a break before adding, almost as an afterthough, "I hope I helped you get there."

Was it his eyes playing tricks, or did Lavi actually see Miku blush a little? He didn't mention it, instead replying, "Yes, you did. You were amazing." After that though, he mentally punched himself so he wouldn't say something like, _you're so amazing, I just want to take you up in my arms and never let go_ or something like, _I think you're the best thing that ever happened to me and I love you_. He figured that it was better to stop and refrain from venturing into that territory. For one, he didn't know how Miku felt about him – and he wasn't aware of any personal goals and rules Miku had set for herself. In fact, although there wasn't proof that they existed, he felt that Miku definitely had them. That feeling was quite a strong one too.

Back in reality, Miku shook her head, "Nah, I'm not amazing."

"Miku, you undermine yourself." Lavi smiled at her, almost lazily. "You put so much effort into singing, you take everything that they throw at you in training sessions seriously, you even bothered to help me when there were like, ten staff members there to do it. You're amazing, Miku."

"Thank you." And right in front of his eyes, her whole face was flushed pink – a vibrant hue at that.

"Oh my god. You should look at yourself, you are so red-"

"Do, NOT poke fun." While her tone was fairly deadly, it was also coupled with humor. So Lavi was quite sure he was safe from a potential death.

"You're cute, Miku."

It appeared that _that_ statement just intensified the colour on her normally-pale cheeks.

And before Lavi could pull the brakes, Miku stepped out of her seat and went to his side. It wasn't a mere hug that followed, and nor was it a playful slap on the head. Instead, Lavi was suddenly caught up in what he had been refraining from doing for a long while – kissing her. Only now, she was kissing him. Was there a difference?

Lavi didn't care though. He gently pulled her closer, one hand in her hair, supporting her head, while the other was around her slim waist – encaging her, refusing to allow her to leave. This was it, this absolute heaven that he had been yearning for. _Perfect_. He didn't care about his surroundings – all the remaining staff (total:six) could have been staring and taking photos for all he cared. And what drove him further was that Miku was returning his kisses – hesitantly at first, as though she was bewildered that she had even initiated it. But now, it was mutual, this utter want for one another. What they hadn't tried before but had gotten close to – what aided their awkwardness in the first place –

"No." Lavi had withdrawn, and Miku had frozen – ironically, on his lap, "We can't do this."

And as though woken from a dream that she shouldn't have been having, Miku hit herself weakly on the head before nodding once. "It's not going to work."

"It's not going to work."

_The cat and the rabbit,_

_Running in circles,_

_Catching sight of one another,_

_Losing one another,_

_And desperately running again,_

_A painful, endless cycle ..._

**A/N** – A quick update! It's been a chapter full of conflict –sigh- Lavi is doing his best to be careful –refraining, and then Miku went and screwed it up! XD I had a kind of warped fun writing this chapter – Ayumu is growing quite complex, and if you were wondering, will be introduced to more Noah.

I'm personally rooting for Miku and Lavi to come to their senses and realise that being together should be okay – what am I saying, I'm the one _writing _this XD I hope you've enjoyed! And remember to review! I love getting feedback =]

I also made a date screw up T.T It's supposed to be October [gahhhh]


	26. Chapter 26 Scattered Emotions

Diamond Rose

Chapter 26

Scattered Emotions

Miku didn't know what had come over her. Kissing Lavi of all things. Actually kissing him. Of her own will. And as per expectations, they had carried on for several minutes before Lavi came to his senses and forced them to break apart.

So in a way, she was deeply thankful to him. In fact, she didn't blame him for anything. Of all the things he could have chosen to do, he chose to stop, and Miku couldn't help feeling a sense of gratitude and yet, it was tinged with deep regret. She couldn't understand it. She had vowed to herself to stay away. Lavi was not here permanently, all she would accomplish by being with him was hurting herself. Moreover, she knew that it would ultimately hurt Lavi too, and that was something she didn't want. And of course, Miku didn't believe in long-distance relationships. They didn't last. They never did. So in a way, she reasoned, she was being a total selfish bitch who was concerned about her own emotions, first and foremost. _The nicer way of putting it,_ she mused, _is that I'm afraid of getting hurt._ Which was terribly cliché.

But it was true, so it sucked while being a terrible cliché.

She walked down the brightly-lit hallway, debating furiously with herself. Unfortunately, she didn't have many hallways to walk down, and didn't have the time to walk down them while debating furiously with herself. This fact was further accentuated when her manager texted her. Miku replied by walking faster to the elevator and jabbing the down button.

She had a rehearsal to get to and that incident was not going to stop them from giving a fantastic performance. She wasn't going to get paid very well otherwise, anyway.

* * *

Lavi wanted to punch himself, but he knew full well that he wouldn't do any effective damage, and the staff that surrounded him would probably grab him and call an ambulance in case he was suffering a severe mental illness. So he didn't, although he dearly wanted to for being such a fool. He couldn't understand it - why had Miku done that? And afterwards? The old him would have gotten angry, blamed her. But now, he closed his eyes, confusion clouding his senses. This Lavi would take it in his stride, grudgingly and painfully as he did. He didn't know how to get angry at Miku anymore anyway.

Hearing the door in the car open, he looked over to see Miku nodding to someone – probably her manager, before slipping inside. She looked at him – blue and green met – for a second, Lavi was expecting her to turn away, flush, something – an act of avoidance. But contrary to his expectations, and shockingly so, she moved closer to him – to the middle seat and then buckled her seat belt. Her voice was quiet – controlled, tinged with hesitance. "About back there ... I made a mistake."

That was exactly what Lavi _didn't _want to hear. He knew that she truly believed so, and he could understand – in fact, he should have supported her belief. But he wished that it hadn't been a mistake. It just wasn't right. Mistakes weren't supposed to feel so good. Despite these mutinous thoughts, he closed his eyes for a second, before turning to her, smiling gently. "I know."

That day just wasn't going right.

* * *

Ayumu found himself in Lulu Bell's office again. This time though, he had a decision. He knew what he was going to do – knew the consequences. As he stared down at the manilla folder – containing the finer details and final contract, he felt a sense of unease pass over him. But then he thought of his sister. He was helping her. This was the least he could do. He took a breath, forcing himself to stay calm as he looked up at Lulu Bell. "Run me through."

He nearly scowled at the sight of her smirk. How he hated the sight of her now.

* * *

Sorane was on set again. She cast her eyes over the gigantic schedule board, displaying a huge calender, with today's date circled: **28.10**. Currently, things seemed to be going along according to the schedule Marian had set down. So it seemed that everyone working on set was going to spared of a flaming. With her work concerns settled for the moment, she tried to relax in the stupid waitress outfit (Himawari's friend worked in a supposedly haunted café). Inevitably, her thoughts wandered over to that song, **Kuon no Kawa**.

It unnerved her now that she recalled it. It had been a fantastic performance by Miku, but she didn't know why it had left such a huge impression on her. She frowned, failing to understand the mental significance it had. That sorrow that had been communicated through the song was beyond the norm, yet she had never heard Miku sound like that ever before, and never after.

It was a mystery, but for some reason, it was one that she wanted to figure out. And it was about Miku, no less.

It seemed that she was making progress. Unconsciously and unknown to anyone else. In fact, Sorane herself didn't know it yet. But the progress was there, and she was starting down a road she had never treaded.

* * *

Miku felt, against her expectations, _good_, amazing, even. She had always looked forward to her live performances, treasured those opportunities. And now, beneath the huge studio lights, singing into the ever-so-familiar microphone to a packed audience? It felt amazing. Some were here for different artists, but her fans were there. That support was an all-important and beautiful one, and brought her an never-before-seen energy. She didn't need to dance all that much, so she could use her voice to their maximum capabilities. When had she felt so _good_ singing a love song?

"_Every moment spent with you, is a treasure,"_

She turned to the side, to see Lavi, singing beside her. She had grown so used to his presence now – so acquainted to it, that singing alone on the stage left her with a slightly empty feeling. Hearing her voice alone was bearable, but it didn't give her the same feeling of satisfaction. Hearing herself hit the right notes, carry them flawlessly was fantastic, yes, but hearing their voices together, his lower, her's higher. They just fit so much better – in her view, two voices, perfectly harmonised gave a song so much more depth.

"_Even so, I know I can bear to let go,"_

As she sang that last verse, Miku felt the smile on her face, begin to fray. No. She could not do such a thing. Lavi was deeply important to her. If he were not important in the romantic sense, he was the best friend that she had. He listened to her and considered her emotions, gave her space when she needed it. He even made her music sound complete. How on earth was she supposed to let go?

"_I can find another way, a new start,"_

Miku questioned that. Could she really? She didn't feel that she had the necessary confidence, she was tentative – ridiculously so at times. But she couldn't deny some kind of fearlessness she had when it came to some things. Did she _want_ a new start? Yes, it was that idea of wanting, wishing. She had already gotten a new start – twice in fact. Did she need or want another one? Was their fragile relationship beyond repair? Was it now, wrong to want him in the romantic sense?

"_It's okay if you forget about me,_

_I'll be reborn into your memories,_

_A rosebud, ready to spring into full bloom …"_

Ayumu just stared at his hand. It was reality – he couldn't possibly deny that he had just signed a contract. A contract with Flight Records, and the talent agency that he was to be training under was managed by the overarching branch, Rainbow Star. The talent agency was none other than, Brightlight. He didn't want to go. He felt weird enough, in this storm, this unfriendly world. Why did he have to go to the place that was hugely responsible for his years without a sister? Why?

To protect that sister of his.

He stood, taking the documents from Lulu Bell silently. He then stood, and turned his back on her, leaving the room. And insolent as it was, slammed the door behind him. He knew Lulu wasn't going to make a big deal out of it, and he knew that he couldn't possibly get into any trouble if she didn't. It seemed like an okay idea, blowing all his pent-up rage and hatred. It was stupid, childish, yes, but there was no other way.

He couldn't tell Miku – no. He had even requested that his new contract was kept secret – that he wouldn't be listed on the official Flight Records artist list until he debuted. He knew how Miku would react. She needed time to recuperate, and this news wasn't going to help.

As he stabbed the down button for the elevator, he heard a familiar voice. He turned around, eyes widening. _Shit._ It was Allen Walker. He had forgotten about him. The elevator came to save him two seconds later, and he bolted inside.

But Allen was in good shape for someone who only sat around writing music and eating for work. He had sprinted to the elevator, stuck his arm out, causing the elevator doors to hiss open again, allowing him in. He frowned as he stepped in, Clearly, concerned with why he was hear at all. "What are you doing here?"

Ayumu was screwed. It was obvious that he wouldn't have been permitted to enter the building had he not had any direct dealings with someone in the company. It seemed that truth was the only option. He simply couldn't believe that his plans were getting ruined already. He sighed, as the doors closed with a short hiss, and they started travelling down the building. "I've been signed into this label."

"No."

The blue eyes were glaring. They most definitely were. "Yes. And I didn't have a choice."

"Really?"

"They said they'd cut Miku if I refused."

"So you really didn't have a choice."

_Scattered remains of perfection,_

_Thrown into a storm,_

_It was not meant to be that way,_

_But it was._


	27. Chapter 27 Dream Interval

Diamond Rose

Chapter 27

Dream Interval

Lenalee relaxed in her plane seat. It was plain, simple economy, and she did not complain. She had a small frame to begin with, so there was no point in all the extra space that business class and private jets provided. Not that she was on those flashy flights much. This time, she was feeling extra good, seeing that Kanda was beside her, sleeping.

His head was tilted slightly towards her (she sat in the window sea), and Lenalee couldn't help studying his features. He really was beautiful. It wasn't fair sometimes, she whined to herself. How did a _man_ become so beautiful and handsome? How?

She turned away, to look out the window. It was pitch black – as per expectations. They still had a bit less than an hour to go before they landed – Kanda had dropped off to sleep almost immediately. Lenalee wasn't surprised. She knew full well how many strings he had to pull to get her onto the flight at all, let alone a job in China. But she had to admit, going back to her homeland and with a job? It was so fulfilling, and she simply couldn't thank Kanda enough.

* * *

Ayumu didn't seem to have freedom anymore. It was all gone. He was currently sitting in Lulu Bell's office, staring out the window that gave a dull view of other Tokyo high rise buildings. He listened to her tapping on the computer – the quick writing on a notebook. Just listening seemed to torture him slowly – all these actions were leading up to a meeting that would determine his future. And it was sadly, a future he did _not _want.

Lulu seemed to have noticed this, as she dropped her pen on the mahogany desk, and spun around in her swivel chair to face him properly. "Hey, how are you feeling?"

Ayumu just glanced at her – blue gaze sharp and containing the barest hint of anger. But Lulu had to admit – every single time he was in her office, he was in a bad mood. He turned away again, to study the sky. "It's raining."

Here Lulu frowned, also looking out the window. It was clear. The sky was grey, yes, but there was no rain. So, clearly, the thirteen-year-old was speaking in the figurative sense. But how was she supposed to interpret his emotions? Rain was commonly used in reference to despaire, sadness, but she could only see anger and refusal in him. As she was about to reply, the door swung open, revealing three figures. Lulu immediately stood, striding over to the largest figure, while Ayumu just turned to face them.

"Earl, glad you could make it."

The broad man turned to grin massively as Ayumu, who felt greatly disturbed. Those teeth were really huge. "Anything for our new star."

Lulu was now addressing the two accompanying the so-called "Earl". "Tyki, Road. Nice to see you."

Tyki turned out to be a friendly-looking man, his hair swept back, a beauty mark apparent on his face. He was dressed in a suit. Walking confidently beside him was a girl, her black hair spiky, and dressed in rather eye-catching clothes.

Ayumu raised an eyebrow at the sight of them. What did they have to do with this whole mess? He remained silent as they all took seats, speaking together – clearly, they were well-acquainted. Ayumu was quickly jolted from his thoughts as the girl – Road, dropped into the seat beside him.

"You're looking pissed."

He responded instantaneously, "You look too at ease."

She giggled in an almost evil manner before replying cheerfully. It was an eerie type of cheerful. "You shouldn't be pissed. You're lucky."

Ayumu disagreed whole-heartedly with that comment. How on earth was he lucky?

* * *

Allen wasn't sure what to do. He wasn't on good terms with Ayumu. He was hearing about a new job coming his way. He wanted to do the best for Miku. But he wasn't sure what was best for her. Common sense dictated that she should know about her brother, but that was not really the best for her, yet it would be the best for Ayumu. The composer felt a heavy migraine coming on to him, and there wasn't really anyone to help ease it.

Well, there was Sorane. But it was ridiculously hard to contact her. For one, she didn't answer phone calls during work. Well … maybe from him. But how would she help? She had enough problems, what with the lack of job offers and Marian working the entire set like slaves. He had heard Marian reduce Himawari to tears multiple times now – it wasn't even news anymore. He had to admit, work was getting terribly boring now that Lenalee had hitched a ride with Kanda and gotten a high-class job in China.

As Allen munched on a sushi roll, he mulled all of these thoughts over. He couldn't deny it, he was worried about Miku's kid brother. He looked dead. He really did. Allen had caught sight of him this morning, and he looked like absolutely deadly and exhausted at the same time. It was amazing to see – especially from a thirteen year old. But that wasn't really a good thing. He considered trying to get work with him. God knows he needed someone he knew. A light flickered on in his mind. That new job offer that was rumoured to come his way – perhaps it was with him? He stood immediately (devouring the remains of the sushi roll at the same time) and headed over to the head of his department. He wanted answers and he wasn't afraid of how to get them. Heck, inviting his boss to a game of poker with information bets sounded pretty good.

Nobody would catch him cheating, surely. He was too good.

Ayumu felt fairly useless. He had no need to be useful, seeing that these people were just deciding his new career without his consent – or, minimal consent. But he still felt it. Uselessness. Contrary to that though, he was also aware that by being here at all, he was doing his sister an immense favour – even though she did not know about it. Yet. So as he sat sandwiched between Lulu and Road around the long conference table, he felt his mood plummet to new depths.

What happened next disturbed him. Greatly.

Road's voiced pierced the dull hum of discussion that ran over his head as she addressed Lulu in a ridiculously cheerful and energetic manner, "Lulu ~ Can Ayumu show me around? I'm bored." She spoke in a childish way – although she couldn't possibly have been younger than thirteen.

Lulu Bell just smiled and gestured to the door, "Have fun."

And with that, Road was stringing along Ayumu with her, out into the corridor. She addressed him, grinning broadly, "Where shall we go, Ayu-chan?"

The use of his nickname disturbed him, but he did nothing to correct her lack of respect. Instead, he just answered her. A part of him just wanted to do something. Anything. Even if it involved someone he hated for no logical reason. "I know where. I need to check something though."

All he needed to check was how to get to the rooftop. As it turned out, it wasn't terribly difficult, and the idiots who maintained the building had conveniently left the door to the rooftop unlocked. At least Ayumu was lucky in some ways. As he pushed the door open, Road interrupted him.

Her voice was sly, calculated and also teasing."You aren't gonna-"

"Committing suicide is stupid."

That seemed to shut her up. Ayumu stepped outside, breathing deeply as the cold air rushed past fiercely, whipping his long-ish black hair messily. He buried his hands in his jacket pockets, allowing the wind to rush around them. The cold numbed him slightly, but did little else. Now in an environment that he was more comfortable in, Ayumu stepped towards the nearest railing, tilting his head backwards to stare at the sky. Surprising himself, he spoke to Road. "Talk."

And much to his surprise, she did.

_Slowly, the rain falls,_

_The misty veil lifts,_

_Revealing precious answers,_

_Or perhaps a mirage,_

_Taunting …_

Lavi could not understand. Things were progressing too fast. Much too fast. Fast to the point where he simply could not accept. Normally, when he couldn't accept, he refused to sleep and kept thinking. Thinking. As the moon crept up to the centre of the black sky, he stared at the laptop screen. He did not scowl at it – it was a waste of energy on his face muscles (stupid and silly the reason was). He just stared at the screen, baring the grim news that he had been aware of – he had been painfully aware, in fact, that it was going to come his way sometime. Sooner or later. But even though he had been almost _waiting_ for the news, Lavi wasn't sure how to accept it.

He didn't bother reading, he just stared at the screen. The only thing his eyes registered were shapes – not words, not dates. Just black shapes on a white screen, glowing in the utter dark.

He was due to leave on December 20th.

There had been no indication of him returning.

Nothing.

Lavi sighed as he ran a hand through his hair – effortlessly messing it up and providing little distraction for himself. How was he supposed to accept this? He didn't want it. It was the last thing he wanted. He had no love for Japan as a country, he liked Europe, felt at ease there. But he did love Miku and he understood that there was little chance of her leaving. Everything precious to her resided in the island nation. And slowly, Lavi realised that everything he treasured, was here too.

He thought back to how he had gotten into the whole mess at all. But he really wasn't achieving anything, thinking about it.

_Falling, falling, falling,_

_An endless plummet,_

_When will it stop?_

_When will the moon,_

_Hit the floor,_

_And shatter …_

**A/N - Hope you enjoyed that guys. Yes, it doesn't really contain any big plot value, [Ayu doesn't count, he's a side plot XD] but I certainly enjoyed writing it and I hope you enjoyed it. I feel that it's going to be the last we see of Kanda and Lenalee until further notice, unfortunately. It's a break before the ... ah, I shouldn't give it away =] **

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Visit my blog [see profile for link] for any updates [there aren't any at this moment, though XD] or future projects or just to stalk me XD, la dee da da ~ and please leave a review! **

**Arigatou, minna !**


	28. Chapter 28 Silhouette

Diamond Rose

Chapter 28

Silhouette

_The red-haired boy stared up at the sky. It was a full moon. So pure, so white, spoiled by only the smallest patches of grey – craters, he knew that full well. He stared up at the moon, not daring to look behind him. Because he knew, as he registered his unnatural, sharp breathing, that behind him, was what used to be his home. What was now ablaze in flames. He did not dare to look behind. Because all that was left was the burnt, shattered, dying remains of all he had loved._

_In one night, he had lost everything. His name was Lavi. Lavi Bookman._

_A boy who had lost everything._

Lavi sighed as he watched Timcampy climb over his furniture, sniffing, exploring, although he had already done so five times in the two days he had kept the cat. He didn't really mind that he had been unable to give Miku the cat. Actually, he felt that it was better that he had gotten his timing all wrong. Because following that message from his manager, he felt that it was not the right time. Besides, he found Timcampy's company welcoming. Perhaps it was just a cat, but it was a real, living being beside him. Who had a connection with Miku. With that knowledge alone, he felt comforted.

At 12:47AM, Lavi drifted off to sleep on the couch.

"_What is your name?"_

_Lavi stared up at the man. But truth to be told, there wasn't a lot to stare _up_ at. The man addressing him was definitely at least 60. He stared up at him with the one eye he had salvaged from his past. "Lavi."_

"_Your surname?"_

_The boy contemplated giving it. The only thing the carers at the orphanage had pulled out of him was his first name. He knew that they were looking for any relatives that could take him in – he knew full well that he had none. He wasn't hiding that fact because he didn't like the non-existent relatives. Lavi just didn't want to have to acknowledge that fact that he had none. That there wasn't anything left for him to treasure. Nothing. Nobody for him to love. So Lavi kept staring up at the man sitting beside him – interrupting his reading time._

"_Well?"_

_Lavi sucked in a breath as he started his request. "If I tell you, can you not tell them?" He glanced at the staff busying themselves outside with some of the other children._

_The old man looked outside, appearing to consider his request. He stared at him for several moments, before answering. "Will you live with me if I tell them?"_

"_Y-yes."_

Lavi heaved a breath as faint rays of morning light pierced the room, lifting him from his sleep. He blinked blearily, sitting up from his former position on the couch. He noticed the brown bundle of fur, head tucked beneath its tail beside a satin cushion. The redhead looked around, feeling tired but also somewhat refreshed. Perhaps he'd be able to figure out his trainwreck of a life.

There wasn't really much hope, but it was the only thing he could try,

"_How old is he?"_

"_Twelve."_

"_Well, if you are willing-"_

"_No, he is not going into your stupid, piddly, modelling business – you are ruining his life by encouraging –"_

"_But sir, he himself expressed some interest, and –"_

"_No. That is final."_

_Lavi found himself frowning, peering into the office where the agency scout was arguing with his adoptive father – who was more a grandfather than anything. The raised voices didn't look like a good sign – things were most definitely going rather horribly._

"_Look, our agency is willing to do anything for him – he is worth –"_

"_Do NOT treat him like a product."_

"_Sir –"_

"_Get out of my house."_

_At that point, the scout that formerly had a pleasant, reasonable expression – it morphed into a dark look. A smirk crossed his features as he looked down upon the elderly man. He slipped a piece of paper out of a manilla folder he drew out of his bag and placed it in front of Lavi's adoptive parent. "Please consider this."_

_Lavi's eyes widened in shock as his adoptive father hissed in fury before speaking once more – he was clearly forcing the words out – disgusted by them. "I will give permission. But you must tell him everything. Everything. You know my connections."_

_And so they did._

* * *

**Lavi Bookman. 12.**

I felt useless. I guess in a way, I am useless. They told me that they had given my father a set of conditions that would enable me to become a part of the industry – a model. What they didn't say was that they blackmailed him.

They blackmailed him.

It's all my fault.

I heard the people call out for me. I don't like the job anymore. It leaves a bad taste. Every single time I step off the set, I feel like a weight has been lifted off me. I feel free when they leave me alone. When I don't had to grin and do whatever in front of a camera. It feels better. Better.

But better doesn't equal good, you know?

I stood up from the chair they gave me and walked towards them. They spoke to me, telling me what to do, how they were going to do it. I listened. I nodded. And I went ahead and did whatever it was they wanted me to do. I didn't have a right to complain. I didn't need to. I just did what they asked me to. I could smile easily enough. Looking distant was easy too. Everything seemed easy.

But I always feel like there's a weight on my chest. I don't like it.

I stopped for a second – there was a lot of yelling on the other end. I turned to look. One of the metal pillars that supported lighting seemed to be failing. Something about a braking system? Jamming? I didn't get it. But there just seemed to be a lot of chaos over there. I turned back to the camera – the people around me looked a little bit anxious. But everything seemed fine.

That is …

Until I heard that sound.

It hurt my ears.

What came next was the pain. It was a dull, thudding kind of pain. My hair and face … it felt sticky and wet at the same time. The smell of metal just invaded my nostrils. It was subtle and yet it was so distinct; it's presence was just so … there. And my head. It hurt so much. I heard a lot of shouting too. It was muffled though. I couldn't hear it clearly. I hear them shouting about an ambulance. I think. My left eye could see. I kept blinking because I couldn't turn my head and there was a really bright light that I had to stare at.

"_There's severe damage to his right eye – he most definitely won't be able to see, even though we've saved the eye. We've repaired his eyelid. He doesn't have any other severe head injuries, thankfully. He will suffer recurring headaches for a week or so until he heals. But he's fine, I'm happy to say."_

"_Losing an eye is fine?"_

"_Sir, we are speaking in relation with his injuries. He has escaped the worse-case scenario, we can say that he is fine."_

"_Fine. Please leave."_

_The opening and closing of a door. The red-haired boy stirred. A bandage ran around his head, and he was connected to the various tubes. He couldn't move easily and he felt sore in so many places. But overall, his head was hurting. It was a blunt, dull pain. It surrounded his mind. It was a constant reminder of what happened. It was an intense pain that reverberated in the background of his mind, reminding him. He heaved a breath, opening the one eye that he could open. The lights in the room were dim. He could see well enough. But it was only one eye. ThereHe spoke, his mouth felt dry and the words came out weird – at least, they sounded so to him. "Panda."_

"_Do not call me that."_

"_I'm in a hospital, right?"_

"_Yes, Lavi."_

"_Why is there a bandage around me head?"_

"_Lavi … there was an accident. When you were working …"_

_The words faded away as Lavi failed to focus. He relaxed, thinking back. Yes, he could remember. He could remember. It was quite clear in his mind. He remembered. _

"_Panda. What happened to my eye?"_

"_The structure didn't cut deeply into your eye, but the injury was still fairly severe. There was no way to retain your vision, your eyelid was sliced. The surgeons have guaranteed that you will live and the eye will most likely not-"_

"_I DON'T HAVE AN EYE!" Lavi felt bad yelling, he did. It wasn't like him. He hadn't blown his top in so long. But he lost an eye. _An eye_. Nobody lost an eye and treated it like it was nothing. He had lost half his sight. Plus, he looked like a freak. Some kid who walked out a war zone. _

_Shouting alone had wasted so much of his energy, his weakened body had trouble relaxing now. He could almost hear his heart pounding, the blood rushing through his veins, his arteries. He heaved a breath, shutting the one eye that he retained. He was frustrated. No, perhaps more than frustrated. The pain that weighed on his mind, his heart … it was hurting him so badly. _

_Maybe because it wasn't the first time._

_He had felt it before. The feeling of loss, the feeling that he desired so much never to feel again. It pounded against his conscience – it was evil. It reminded him of how unfair his existence was in comparison to others'. _

_Sure, he had a decent job, he had freedom._

_But he didn't have a real family. He didn't have any real purpose in life._

_He had just lost an eye._

_And eye._

_He started crying._

_And what was worse, he realised as he tried rubbing those tears away, was that he only had one eye to cry with._

Lavi entered the rehearsal room, tired. His whole profile reeked of exhaustion, lack of sleep. But as he closed the door quietly behind him, his gaze settled on the petite figure of Miku sleeping, head buried in her arms on the makeup table … he realised all over again that he had purpose now.

He would go.

But he would return. For sure.

And he was hoping that she'd be waiting.

_All that remains of you is a silhouette,_

_All that remains of me is a shadow,_

_But we had an unbreakable connection,_

_It is the light._

_We'll reach out for it._

**A/N - Soooo an entire chapter, dedicated to some small but important parts of Lavi's past. It was really difficult for me to write this chapter - at first, I wasn't going to do Lavi's POV, but then again, it would be so much harder and complex if I described his emotions from a third person position. So I went to the source. I hope you enjoyed it [regardless of how depressing it may be] ! **

**And of course, please review! The more feedback I get, the more inspired I feel to write and improve - it's always like that =]**


	29. Chapter 29 Distance

Diamond Rose

Chapter 29

Distance

Miku breathed in deeply as she stepped out of the door in the early morning. At five, it was still fairly dark and the air was chilly. She was wearing a double-breasted coat dress over a black turtleneck and skinny jeans. As she walked down the road, her lace-up boots hitting the pavement with sure, steady 'tap's, a smile lit up her features. She was feeling good. It was the type of good that effortlessly emerged out of nowhere. That mysterious feeling. She had a good feeling about today. She couldn't exactly pinpoint why, but she just felt it. The optimism that surrounded her was contagious.

Her canvas backpack was slung over her shoulders, her hair was suppressed by a cap. It was a long walk to the bus stop, and she didn't feel like calling up a taxi. _Besides, _she reasoned, _it's such a good day, why waste it in a car?_ She breathed in the fresh air, grinning broadly. Surely things would go right today.

Eventually, she arrived, much earlier than she needed to be. Miku walked through to quiet hallways until she arrived at one of the rehearsal/dressing rooms. She opened the door of the one that had been booked for the day. Her feet took her along the clothes that hung on the hangers. They hung, suspended in the flow of time until they were required. A small smile came to Miku's face she ran her fingers across each jacket, each shirt, each dress … It reminded her of Lenalee, who had left for China only last week.

_It's funny. Her absence is already being felt._ Miku stopped walking as she reached the end of the row. _I wonder who will remember me if I'm gone._

* * *

Miku left the conference beaming, but that joy was being contained. Contained for the sake of Lavi, who looked like he hadn't slept and was about to faint due to exhaustion any second. She didn't even need to have the slightest romantic feeling for him to feel concerned. He looked utterly dead on his feet. "Um. Lavi."

Even his responses were slow. He turned to look at her as they walked, blinking for a moment, "Yes?"

She might as well be blunt and straight to the point, it didn't look like he was going to last much longer on his feet, let alone in a conversation. "You look dead."

Lavi still appeared to have enough energy to respond in his usual cheery manner. "Don't be ridiculous, of course not-"

Until he walked into the wall as they reached a turn in the hallway. Miku had winced as he made contact with the hard surface, but also used the opportunity to make her point. "See what I mean?" She could help sighing as she gestured for her manager to keep going and reached out for Lavi, "Come on, let's find you somewhere to sleep."

The redhead leaned against the wall as he contemplated her outstretched hand. He had two options – go about it the long way and deny his exhaustion, or he could well … try something else. Obviously, taking the hand would be the way to go about the "something else". Did he want to though? Lavi just contemplated her hand a little more. He observed how smooth it was – her clean fingernails. It seemed that whenever the stylists attached fake fingernails or applied nail polish, the first thing she did was remove it.

His green gaze lingered on a little longer until he simply couldn't resist anymore and took her head. And as he did, he was smiling. Lazily, yes, but the obvious delight portrayed in that idle grin was rather difficult to miss.

* * *

As Miku was about to silently celebrate this small "victory" in her mind, she felt a heavy weight lean onto her, and arms slink around her waist and back. A few seconds later, she was sitting on the floor, Lavi draped across her. His one visible eye was close as his head leaned on her shoulder, his warm breath making contact with Miku's chin. He was sound asleep. The readers of this story shall now assume that physical contact through holding Miku's hand had overwhelmed his already tired mind, thus, leading to his sudden sleep.

Narrator's … narrating aside, Miku couldn't help the blush that fled up to her cheeks and she was highly grateful to Lavi's sleep, as such, he couldn't see this phenomena. His full weight had been too much for Miku to bear of both feet, and now, while it wouldn't be too hard to disentangle herself from his weak embrace, she couldn't bear to do so. Suddenly, in the middle of a hallway, and on the floor no less, he seemed to be at ease, dreaming.

In comparison to his former appearance, she preferred this one better. While there was no way for him to smile at her, no way for him to speak to her in his ridiculously easy-going manner, Miku liked him asleep, because he seemed to be at ease. She cared more about his sense of ease, the lack of stress, more than what contact she had with him. It made Miku happier to see him succeed in whatever it was he was doing than to see him struggle through the day, all the while hiding something from her with his charm. It was true that this negative change … she had only seen it from him for a very short time today, but it still worried her to no end.

As she thought and watched him sleep in the middle of the corridor, Miku let time tick by, until she was sure that her manager was going to come running to see what the issue was. Her legs were getting numb, but she didn't really care.

_This lost paradise,_

_We'll slip into a deep sleep,_

_And meet each other there,_

_Escaping our nightmares,_

_Meeting in dreams …_

"Miku."

The singer looked up from her berry milkshake and looked at Allen, she slurped unceremoniously before speaking, "Yeah?"

"I am discussing your digital single. Of course, if you don't want to treat this new project seriously, that's fine by me, I can skip work, head to a favourite restaurant of mine where the chef – Jerry – is a fabulous person and can make anything I desire –"

She was scowling now, "Okay, I get you. Sorry, I was spacing –"

Allen was still speaking, pointedly ignoring her apology, "Once, I asked for mitarashi dango and his creation was just beautiful – the dish was like a work of art exploding in my mouth –"

"Allen. Your idea of art is rather twisted and if you don't hurry up and forgive me, I'll tell Sorane that instead of ranting about your absolutely delightful girlfriend, you choose to rant about something as petty as food –"

"Oi –"

"I'm _sure_ that Sorane would be ecstatic to hear that her boyfriend places food over her –"

"Miku. Did you make up with her?"

She stopped dead in her tracks, taking a moment to slurp up some more milkshake. Better some type of ugly sound than a sullen silence. She blinked, blue eyes sliding over to avoid her friend's gaze. "No." There was a long pause before either one of them spoke again. "I will do that though. Sometime in the future."

And with that the pair lapsed into a unnaturally quiet and awkward situation, pierced only by the shuffling of papers, occasional slurp of a milkshake, and some tentative, work-related speech. Awkward.

And remained so until Lavi walked in, a cup of instant coffee in his hand. The first thing he did was step over to the nearest bin and proceed to pour the cheap, brown liquid into the garbage before dropping the foam cup. He appeared to relish the sound of the cheap drink being wasted. He blinked when he heard sniggering a few metres away. He looked at them, blinking in his innocent/stupid look, "What?"

It was Allen that was rude enough to mention what the sound had reminded the pair of, "You know that sounded like pi-"

Miku was laughing uncontrollably while she attempted to scold him, "That. Is. Gross."

"But you were so thinking it-"

And the trio proceeded to drown themselves with hysterical laughter.

* * *

The day had been not quite perfect, but according to Miku, it was still quite wonderful. She had witnessed many great things, and laughed in a way she hadn't been able to do in a while. She pondered her day as she strolled down the city streets. The lights illuminated the streets, making it a well-lit, relaxing place to be. She had wrapped a woollen scarf around her neck, her coat-dress was properly fastened, and her hands were stuck deep in her pockets as she walked.

The nights were getting colder, and while Miku tended to enjoy colder weather, for once, the temperature saddened her. She kept walking, dwelling on this feeling. It was very slight, but it lingered in the air around her. It was as though there was something she was forgetting, something that was bound to come. Something she had been aware of.

She couldn't remember, though.

Miku thought through it as she walked down the paved roads, thought about it as she took a break to buy a warm drink from a vending machine, she continued to contemplate it while waiting for the last bus of the day. She even skipped the light sleep she usually took on the bus to think. She just couldn't figure it out. But even though she didn't know what it was she was concerned about – that distant atmosphere around her, Miku instinctively knew that it was important. It was vital. She simply had to remember. She kept trying to remember as she found her way through the dimly lit neighbourhood of her home, kept thinking up the stairs to her bedroom, thinking.

The thinking paused for a moment as she checked her emails for tomorrow's timetable. Her blue eyes rested on the short note underneath the main schedule:

_Miku! I got this invitation, you are definitely attending, I'm not sure about Lavi though, anyway, just a heads up._

**_2010 CHRISTMAS CELEBRATION – FLIGHT RECORDS WELCOMES YOU!_**

**_We at Flight Records are delighted to invite you to our annual Christmas celebration. Celebration details are below:_**

**_DATE: 25.12.2010_**

**_TIME: 10:00PM – 12:00AM_**

**_LOCATION: Ark Hotel, Ballroom 5_**

**_We look forward to your attendance! _**

Miku stared at it for a few more moments. Frowning, she left her seat in front of her laptop and dug out her phone from her canvas backpack. She scrolled through her contacts until she landed on Lavi's number. She rarely attempted communication through phone – she never had a need. As she called the number, she hoped that he would answer.

Her wish was granted – Lavi had answered only a second after it began to ring, "Miku!"

"Uh – Hi, Lavi, are you feeling better?"

"Ngaww, I'm touched, you called for the first time ever just to ask that?"

"No, not just that."

"What is it?"

"The Christmas –"

"Oh. That."

Miku did not like what she was hearing. The drop in energy of his voice was beyond obvious and she had a feeling that she really wasn't going to like what was coming next.

"I know that they never finalised it and never told you … until now that is." There was a short pause before he started speaking again. "I'm leaving on the 20th. I won't be able to make it. My manager declined for me."

It hit her then. Miku couldn't speak for the next few seconds. The news that she had been trying to recall this whole evening, now that it had been revealed to her, she simply couldn't accept it. Couldn't.

Lavi seemed to be getting worried on the other end, "Miku? Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Lavi, I need to sleep."

"Good night."

"Same to you." She ended the call immediately, dropping her cell phone onto her lap.

It wasn't a good day at all.

It was a horrible day.

On a good day, your heart didn't hurt that much.

_Why is it that whatever I do__,__  
__When I realize I'm thinking of you,__  
__I just don't know what to do …_

**A/N - OH MA GAAAAA. Haha, I quite like this chapter. I'd like to acknowledge Kana Nishino's latest single, Distance. I used the opening verse in the last part here -pokes above- and the song title for the chapter title. The song doesn't really match the mood of this chapter, while I find that the lyrics kind of do. Good stuff. Anyway, I'm going to spam some info here. **

**To be specific, regarding Lavi - he is leaving on December 20th, and returning to Europe where his agency is based. His recording contract with Miku and Flight Records is to be terminated and there are no plans on renewing that contract. Because his modelling schedules in Europe are crazy [come on, he's a total hottie and stuff XD], there isn't really any chance that Lavi can return for a holiday or somesuch. Thus, the drama regarding him leaving. **

**I also want to warn everyone reading about the next chapter. While it isn't the final chapter [there's around 5 or so to go, I think] it may seem a lot like it, as it contains the "happily ever after" vibe. So I just want to say, whatever comes after that chapter, may be a huge disappointment, but please do not bash me. I can guarantee a happy ending. So yes, spoiler, but I found that it was necessary.**

**Either way, I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter! And of course, leave a review :3 And before I leave, I have set up a poll on my profile regarding my next fanfiction. I have plots for all of the series, and I encourage you to vote [up to 2 options]! **

**Arigatou, minna!**


	30. Chapter 30 Inquiries of Love

Diamond Rose

Chapter 30

Inquiries of Love

Miku hadn't slept well. She tossed and turned, slipping in and out of deep sleep. She woke at a rather ungodly hour, to be specific, two in the morning. She switched on her desk lamp and slid her wardrobe door open. If she couldn't sleep, there really wasn't any point in trying. She may as well find something warm to wear and start working on the draft that Allen had handed her.

She eventually sat in her swivel chair, hair untidy. She wore a Nordic-print sweater and bootleg jeans. Her bare feet absentmindedly drew circles on the floor as she stared down at the lyrics, a pen in hand.

Lyrics had always been tricky for her. She rarely wrote them herself, usually creating them with the help of a composer. But with all these hours to spare, she felt for once, that she had enough time to try. Enough time, perhaps, to succeed. With that thought weighing on her mind, she began to write. Occasionally pausing in the writing process to cross a phrase or word out, replace it, move whole blocks of texts around. This process carried on until the run peeked out from its hiding place below the horizon – when the page was a complete mess, decipherable by only Miku.

Miku grabbed a new sheet of lined paper and wrote out what she had achieved. She couldn't help smiling. She was tired and her eyes were threatening to fall shut but it had been worthwhile.

_I had always been afraid,_

_Of the future ahead of me,_

_Would it pull me away from you?_

_Whatever the future is,_

_I will go forward._

Lavi was feeling really bad. He had been able to sleep, properly yesterday, but he replayed his first phone conversation with Miku over and over in his mind, and he had concluded that she wasn't okay. It was as though their positions from yesterday had switched.

But he was proved wrong when he walked into the usual recording studio, just in time to see Miku throw a pen into Allen's lunch.

"Honestly, I worked so hard on them and now you refuse to use it for this single?"

"Yes, honestly, we have an image to fit to –"

"I was nearly late to work because of them and now your rejecting them?"

"Yes, listen to me –"

"NO!"

As Lavi sank into a seat beside them, he snuck a peek at the piece they were arguing over. At least, he tried to. But Miku beat him to it, grabbing the page and stuffing it into her handbag. There was a childish pout on her face as she refused him access, "No."

Lavi laughed, "Come off it, I'm going to see it anyway, why not earlier?"

She remained obstinate, refusing him as she zipped up her handbag. "No."

Seeing no way for him to find out in this current situation, Lavi gave up, leaning back in his seat, "Fine, fine. But you musical geniuses can't just do your jobs without including me, come on."

Allen nodded absentmindedly as he fished around in his jacket pocket for a chocolate bar, "Mm. That's true. But then again, I hardly hear anything creative come out of your mouth."

As the conversation tumbled along, Miku sat there, silent. The events of yesterday night were resurfacing. It disturbed her, sitting here with Lavi. In a month's time, he wouldn't be here anymore. As much as she wanted, it was so hard to be strong. The future was already uncertain, and she didn't know if the label was going to ditch her in favour of someone new. And the more she listened to the conversation, the angrier she grew, and yet, she also wanted to cry.

With all the pent-up emotion in her threatening to explode, she stood up suddenly, nearly knocking over the chair in the process. She headed for the door, but stopped when Lavi called out to her.

"Where are you going?"

She barely turned around, her voice sounded strange – even strangled near the end. "Why should you care? You're not going to be here much longer." With that, Miku sprinted for the elevator.

She didn't know why she was running. There wasn't a reason to. Perhaps it was the tears. The tears that were streaming down her cheeks. Those tears that she didn't want anyone to see.

Once outside, ignoring the worried looks of the receptionist, she stood on the stairs, wiping those tears away. She felt bad, horrible for speaking to Lavi in such a way, but she felt worse because she was accepting the inevitable. She didn't want to accept it, that soon; she wouldn't be able to see him. Miku, unable to do anything, just cried her heart out, with only the cold wind as her company.

At least, that was what she assumed.

What she didn't realise until she heard her name spoken by a familiar voice. Lavi's voice. "Miku."

She hadn't realised how much she loved hearing the sound of her name from his mouth. She hadn't realised how much she needed to hear his voice, all the time. Now, faced with the future of not being able to hear it right beside her, she grew afraid. Against all her wishes, she turned to face him. She felt like a coward – she had run away from him, frightened about what would happen if she had been honest. But now when she looked at the sight before her; Lavi, a worried look on his face, standing in front of her, Miku felt so immensely relieved.

All the time, she had thought that she'd be rejected, at least, he wouldn't take her seriously. She had played out all the possibilities in her mind before – she had been certain that she wouldn't be able to handle it if she was rejected. _But it turns out I was wrong._

And now, faced with reality, she felt that it was the right time – her last chance. She knew she didn't want him to disappear from her side without saying what she had shoved to the very back of her heart, her mind. She wasn't going to regret this, she knew.

As her tears subsided, and wiped away the rest, Miku looked up at Lavi. Her gaze was tentative, questioning. Her voice was nearing a whisper, shy. "Ne, Lavi. Do you love me?"

Lavi wanted to do a lot of things at once. He wanted to walk forward and pull her into his arms. He wanted to burst out laughing in joy as well as relief. But instead, he did his best to maintain the happiness that was blooming inside him and answered her sincerely. "Yes."

A sudden and irrational frantic look took up her eyes, "Um, like sibling love? Like, friends, or what?" Her voice was shaky, panicked, but in a childish, unsure kind of way. The way that made Lavi think that she was adorable more than worry about her.

"I'll love you in whatever way you want me to." Gosh, that was brave of him.

Miku started blushing furiously as she uttered her next request. "Like a girlfriend?"

Lavi allowed himself a light chuckle before he stepped forward and took her hands in his. "What, are you a moron? Of course!"

And completely out of the blue, Miku flung her arms around his neck, tears streaming down her cheeks again. She was bawling, and yet there was a smile plastered to her face. She felt overwhelmed by the development – she was so happy. Happy to the point where she started crying. On the other hand, Lavi felt like the luckiest guy in the entire world and was grinning hugely. As Miku continued to cry into his shoulder as he held her, he kissed her forehead, smiling smugly as she blushed furiously amidst her tears.

It was one beautiful, sunny day in a string of rainy days.

* * *

When Miku got home that day, she ran straight up to her room. Once the door was tightly shut and locked behind her, she slowly slid down as her legs collapsed beneath her, ending up like a puddle on the ground. Her thoughts whirled around in her head at high speeds.

_Oh my god, did I just confess to Lavi?_

_Oh my god, are we together now?_

_Oh. My. God._

A rosy pink colour had risen up to her cheeks as she recalled the day's events. Not only had she cried into Lavi's shoulder, after her crying episode, Lavi had acted like a _total ass_, picked her up using the princess carry and carried her back inside. He continued to do so when entering their recording studio, leading everyone in the room to come to the same conclusion: they had hooked up.

His frivolous behaviour continued throughout the entire day, hugging her in the car when they changed venues to their photoshoot, repeatedly telling her how she was absolutely stunning after the stylists were finished with her (as well as hinting to more perverted topics). And to top it off, when they had returned (continued frivolous behaviour had occurred in the company car), after Miku's voice training session, Lavi proceeded to kiss her in the lobby, in front of the receptionist, under the gaze of security cameras, in front of their managers, and eight other company workers. As Miku dragged him outside, he turned back to yell out to anybody who would listen, "MIKU IS MY GIRLFRIEND AND I AM TOTALLY IN LOVE WITH HER!"

All of these events must have equated to him being a _complete, inconsiderate idiot_.

But Miku was most definitely in love with the idiot.

So it was okay.

In fact, it was better than okay.

It was heaven.

_I hate the way you act in front of me,_

_I hate the way you grin in your smug manner,_

_I hate the way that you show off so much,_

_But I still love everything about you._

**A/N - LAVI AND MIKU FINALLY GOT TOGETHER. ABOUT TIME. Haha~ It was quite fun writing this chapter =] I hope you enjoyed it!**


	31. Chapter 31 Burst Mode

Diamond Rose

Chapter 31

Burst Mode

Great. The tabloids had got a hold of the news. Great. But as Miku absentmindedly threw the article away, she felt that she didn't mind all that much. The world could go on and gossip about how she and Lavi were a couple – they could contemplate how many times they kissed, how they acted around each other. The fans could grow upset, but for once, Miku didn't care. The only thing that mattered was Lavi.

This feeling, this love. It was hard to describe. But it was undeniably one of the best in the world.

* * *

Lavi didn't know what to feel. Miku was official his girlfriend. They were _dating_. For once, he could kiss her without having to wonder if he'd receive an injury afterwards. And yet, as he bathed in his glorious joy, the looming separation was still there. It unnerved him to wake in the morning and remember that he wouldn't be here in a month or so.

In a month or so, he wouldn't be able to be by her side.

But he was still here, he was able to hold her hand, touch he hair, gaze at her with his own eyes. For now.

So he was happy.

That was his conclusion as he stepped out of the elevator and turned a corner, only to be greeted by the sight of Miku staring at her timetable – in front of the recording studio that they had been assigned. Lavi had to stop and stare. It was impossible to resist. To him, she was perfect, beautiful. Today, her hair was tied in a side ponytail, revealing her neck. Her clothes consisted of dark shades; a midnight blue coat-dress, black stockings, bow-accent black kitten heels. It was a simple serious outfit, yet Lavi still found her legs highly appealing. It was unfortunate (for him) that his observations were interrupted by a highly familiar voice – one that he loved hearing.

"Lavi. Stop perving."

He chuckled as he drew her into a hug, kissing her lightly on the cheek. As he had hoped and expected, a healthy pink flush flew up to her cheeks. He released her a moment later, "It's not my fault you chose to wear something so short." There was a huge grin on his face.

Miku glared downwards at her legs, evaluating how high the skirt in question was. "Ah. Shit." She hadn't noticed when she dressed his morning. Naturally, it was all Lavi's fault. After all, she was thinking about him 24/7 now. Nevertheless, she was going to try and focus on her job. Try. "That aside, Lavi."

"Yes, dearest?"

She held up her timetable for him to see, ":I think someone made some last minute changes." She jabbed a thumb in the direction of the door they were standing in front of, "The studio's locked."

"Hm." Lavi took her hand and was dragging her to the elevator now, "We'll just have to find out the change, right?"

* * *

Miku didn't want to believe her eyes. Because in front of her, was none other than her brother, Ayumu Kawaguchi. He was seated between Lulu Bell and Tyki Mikk. His face seemed to paler than normal, he had tried hiding his eyes as much as possible – his fringe was beginning to droop further than it used to. She saw the cold look in his blue eyes, the irritated, almost angry expression of his face. Why was he here?

"Ayu …"

He looked up at her, eyes stony cold. For once, Miku could not read her brother's emotions. For once, she could not understand his troubles. It frightened her, almost. "Sit down." His tone of voice was not commanding nor condescending. It was straight-forward, blunt. But most definitely, it was devoid of any positive emotion. He seemed angry that she had spoken his name.

Miku didn't respond. She was too focused on stopping her hands from trembling. Lavi noticed this and his eyes narrowed a fraction. Things clearly weren't turning out well, so he stepped forward, leading her over to one of the spare seats that remained. "Come on, we shouldn't delay."

Miku relaxed slightly thanks to his words but her nerves were still jangling. Ayumu. What on earth was he thinking?

Ayumu drifted throughout the meeting. He didn't need to speak. There was actually no real point to his presence – it was just that the other artists needed to acknowledge him, see him. The only thing he wanted to do now was get to the recording studio. He didn't need to talk to Miku. It wasn't necessary. He knew that it would cause her pain – not telling her. But she would just waste her energy trying to pull him out of the storm if she knew. And as such, he made up his mind not to tell her. Even so, he was aware of how Miku would feel. She'd be constantly worried, and her mind would dwell on his circumstances.

_Especially when she finds out that I'm going to be moving out in a few weeks._

He sighed just as Tyki got to a rather over-decorated part in his speech. The man in question turned to him, "Is something wrong?"

Ayumu just looked at him before uttering, "No." He was aware of the withering look Lulu was giving him, but he didn't care. It was already quite clear that he was special to them. They needed him quite desperately and nothing was about to change that.

After all, it wasn't often that you picked the two kids of a Jpop legend out and put them on display. Not often. It was going to make history, especially if his music was good.

His thoughts continued to drift throughout the meeting that was dragged out by Tyki alone. _The guy really has some talents. At bullshitting._ He glanced at Miku, who still seemed to be in a bad state. All thanks to him. _She was going to find out sooner or later. It's better if I showed her straight to her face._ Ayumu reassured himself, but the guilt burnt him. He felt disgusting, upsetting his sister. But he also knew he was doing the right thing. Only she didn't know it.

Ayumu let the rest of the meeting fly over his head. He was one of the first ones out the door. And as expected, Miku was sprinting after him. "Ayu-"

"Please don't bother."

He only turned slightly to look at her, and while he kept his expression cold, unmoving, he could still feel the guilt that ate at him when he saw the look on his sister's face. _It's necessary, _he told himself.

Miku didn't want to stay any longer. She wouldn't be able to change his mind, whatever it was he was dwelling on, whatever it was he wanted. So she just turned and walked to Lavi's side and they headed down the hallway.

"What on earth is your brother doing?"

Miku shook her head as they walked, following their managers, "He won't tell me. I was aware that he's been in and out of the house more than usual, but I didn't know about it until today."

A familiar look of concern crossed Lavi's face, "Knowing him, it's probably something to do with you." It was true that Lavi had never been on good terms with Ayumu – in fact, they had never held a conversation. They haven't even exchanged greetings before. But it hadn't been hard for him to tell that Ayumu really did love his sister. To the point where he was quite sure he'd do anything for Miku's happiness. That episode on that rainy day had been clear enough. Who else could have dragged Miku home?

She didn't like those words. "Me?" An almost fierce look crossed Miku's eyes, "Me. What a selfless idiot my brother is." Admittedly, she hadn't needed Lavi to tell her what her brother's motives were. She wasn't an idiot, she knew how the business worked. It was dirty, manipulative and it usually got its way. "I guess I just have to work harder." Her thoughts had drifted to Lavi's leaving. If Ayumu was doing this for her, she may as well take advantage of the situation.

"Great, now you just made me feel guilty." This was followed by a slightly regretful smile from Lavi.

"It's not something you can do anything about." She paused a little before speaking once more, "Besides, I've been riding on your good looks for a bit too long."

That statement shocked and impressed Lavi at the same time. He had been well aware that they had been playing on his looks when it came to the promotional material, but he hadn't expected Miku to catch onto it either. "When did you figure that out?"

A twisted smile met her lips, "Two or so months ago. A little late, but I figured it out."

At this point, Miku was being dragged off to her dance lessons while Lavi was heading over to the recording studio. It was clear what was happening. The digital single was going to be their final release. After that was done, Lavi was being shipped back to Europe.

* * *

Every second that Ayumu spent in the studio, he decided not to waste. After all, he was doing this for Miku's sake. If he slacked off, they could just threaten his sister's career again. He didn't want to hear the threats. In a way, he was just protecting his ears.

"Oi, You have to work with me-"

"Allen Walker. The lyrics are completed. You only need to run over the composition a few times before it's finalised." His blue eyes weren't hiding the silent fury that he often felt nowadays, "I just need to practise. Please just get straight to the point."

Allen had to give in. No matter how much he didn't like the kid's current attitude, he had the same sharpness that Miku had. Bullshitting just didn't work. Working around the central issue in a conversation didn't work either. If you were dealing with either of the siblings, you were blunt. "Fine. Are you going to take this seriously?"

He looked at him, calculating. "What are you referring to?"

"Your new job." See? He was going to be blunt.

"I get you." There was a pause before Ayumu actually said anything meaningful. "I don't want to be a singer. I only signed the contract because they threatened to jeopardise Miku's career and said something to my father. God knows what." He closed his eyes for a moment – and in that second, it seemed to Allen that he was really suffering. "But I do want to make good music. I need to."

Allen felt a small flare or triumph, "So you're going to be serious."

"Yeah. I have to be."

"You certainly don't look it."

For the first time in a while, Ayumu smiled. "I'm not into it. That's the problem." He stretched as he leaned back in the chair, tipping it on two legs, "I'm going on a little field trip."

This made Allen worried. "I-I'll come with you."

Strangely, the youngster didn't refuse him. He just looked at him, one eyebrow raised. "Fine. Come."

_I'll take flight,_

_I'll fly into a storm,_

_I don't want to fly,_

_But I will,_

_For I must._

**A/N - to be honest, this was a very tricky chapter to write and I'm still not entirely happy with the end result =_= Nevertheless, i hope you enjoyed it! I'm sorry for the wait, school just started and my time's been restricted T.T So I guess, expect some longer waits between updates - sorry. =_=" And a note about the last bit - where Allen and Ayumu are going. This won't be revealed next chapter, but it MAY come up in a flashback, I'm not sure. And I've just reviewed my chapter plans ... and it looks like Diamond Rose will end in ... around ten chapters. Or more. **_  
_


	32. Chapter 32 Diamond Time

Diamond Rose

Chapter 32

Diamond Time

It was a week after Miku's discovery – that her brother had been signed into Flight Records. She coped better than expected in Lavi's eyes. There was no breakdown, and whatever had happened at home was never brought up at work. One may have taken it as a bad sign, but Lavi knew that she was – to put it as simply as possible – being professional. He knew that as much as he did, she didn't want to mess up their last month together. Personal issues had a way of doing that.

One night, after work was over, while the digital clock on Miku's cell phone displayed 12:45 AM, the duo sat opposite one another. It was rare that any kind of store would be open so late – but they had found one. It was a plus that it catered to minors. And many of their fellows happened to frequent the place too. On this night, Lavi and Miku had greeted two singers; Hevlaska and Tomoyo Daidouji. Hevlaska was signed into Flight Records while Tomoyo was under Piffle Corp.

Despite their presence, Lavi and Miku were able to keep their spot in the corner – still alone. It was nice how they were being conveniently ignored by everyone unless they called for more drinks. Lavi was slightly put out by the fact that Miku demanded that he stay away from alcohol though.

"No alcohol. No coffee."

"Okay." There was an irresistible smile on his face as he continued on his merry way, "Of course, you'd have to bribe me if I were to stick to your request."

Contrary to his expectations, Miku was perfectly capable of flirting. With her boyfriend. Like that was even necessary, even so, it just made Lavi want her so much more. "The less your breath reeks, the more I want to kiss you."

"Well that works out perfectly fine for me." And there went the smug grin again.

* * *

The last thing she had been expecting that evening had been a visit. Her mother and sister had scheduled meetings – always out. Visitors rarely entered her family's residence. Her mother had a positively furious look on her face when she allowed Allen in, followed by an unfamiliar face.

Small talk had begun once they were led into Sorane's room.

Then the hours passed unnaturally swiftly.

"Sorane-"

"Allen, I need to think." She was flicking through the script that had been handed to her – well, it wasn't really a script. More a storyboard for a PV. As she scanned the planning, she glanced upwards occasionally to study Ayumu. She remembered seeing him – they had never exchanged words before but she had always known him as 'the quiet kid who was Miku's brother'. But he didn't seem to be that quiet kid anymore. "I wouldn't mind this, but it's really up to my manager."

"It doesn't matter."

To her surprise, the one who had spoken was none other than Ayumu. His blue eyes were directed lazily around the room, as though evaluating her living conditions. He was speaking again.

"If you want to do it, you'll get the job."

"Something tells me you want me to do this job very badly."

He turned to her this time, smiling. It disturbed her to find that the warmth didn't reach his eyes. "Ah no. Not really." He paused, composing an answer behind the fake smile, "It'd be great if you accepted though. Saves me the trouble of flicking through fifty applications."

Sorane raised an eyebrow as she stopped looking through the pages and looked at him directly. "Really? That many? Is this before or after your manager narrowed it down?"

Ayumu chuckled, clearly amused, "You're sharp." He pulled a face, as though he was thinking extremely hard, "It was after my manager narrowed it down and there were exactly sixty-seven."

Allen could remember this episode. He had been called up to Lulu Bell's office, and when he had entered, found her glaring at the disaster that her floor was. Ayumu had tipped all sixty-seven applications onto the floor and spaced them out. As Allen watched, the youngster had stepped over them, evaluating each one for not much more than a second. In the end, he hadn't chosen any of them. Much to Lulu Bell's distain, he had said, _"I don't like them."_ Which led them to this situation.

The actress sighed, "You didn't look at them? Why didn't your manager choose someone then?"

Ayumu really didn't want to answer this question. His circumstances were extremely rare and if Sorane proceeded to question him, he wouldn't be able to dodge the inquiry without looking suspicious. Nevertheless. "I have full creative control."

Sorane found this odd. Although it wasn't a well-known fact, singers rarely got to make their own music. They were only granted that benefit if they were popular enough to pull it off – or it they had training. Ayumu had none. Whatever he had done to gain it, she didn't want to know. For starters, it wasn't her business. "Hm. Impressive." She lowered the stapled sheets, placing them on the floor in front of her, "I'll do it."

"Fantastic."

Allen heaved a breath, "Of course it is, I'm going overtime for this and I'm not getting paid. About time a decision was made."

As Ayumu stood, heading for the door, he countered his co-worker's complaints, "You can't rush perfection."

Allen had to agree.

* * *

Never before had Lavi been subjected to _this_. To be specific, he was referring to his position, sitting in the grass beside his girlfriend. He didn't visit parks. He had always found them slightly irritating. Happy, loud kids, running around the playground … smiling. Those joyful expressions had sent some kind of wave through him – Lavi didn't smile because he was happy most of the time.

Regardless, here he was, in a park.

But Miku was there and that seemed to make all the difference.

He didn't mind that the wind was a little chilly, as he had lent Miku his jacket. He didn't mind how it was ridiculously late. He didn't mind a lot of things all of a sudden. Miku was the sun, and he revolved around it. _Perhaps, that's a little intense._ He mused, grinning.

Miku, leaning on his shoulder had caught that look on his face and smiled, teasingly questioning him, "What are you thinking about now?"

"Nothing."

She fingered the collar of his leather jacket for a moment. "Right. And nothing makes you smile like that?"

The look on his face was stuck. "Yes. That's right."

"Hm." A sly look crossed her face – it lasted only a moment, "Normally you only get that look before you –"

"Do this?" In one short moment, Lavi had hooked his arms around Miku's slim frame, and lay down on the grass, dragging her along with him. The result was a rather intimate situation, their faces only inches apart, legs tangled, his arms around her waist.

Through the moonlit night air, Lavi could see Miku's delighted-yet-embarrassed expression perfectly. It was like an addiction. He loved doing this to her, knowing that she would react as such. He loved every moment he spent with her, every memory with her by his side was beautiful. A treasure.

Every word that she uttered just for him, no matter how un-romantic, was a treasure. Each syllable, each word, each sentence.

Miku's answer to his teasing question was whispered, "Yes. Something just like that."

* * *

Sorane sat on her bed, staring out the window. There was a break from shooting tomorrow; there was no need to sleep earlier. Not that she slept early normally.

She stared up at the night sky that she had gazed at for hours on end with Miku when they still attended Brightlight. They'd sneak out after dinner, sit on the roof, talking until they were found and sent to their rooms. It was undeniable that she had needed her time with Miku. She had been the only one who respected her, and still treated her like a normal person. It was the black-haired, pale girl with horrid fashion sense that had listened to her while everyone ignored her. It was her, the one that stayed at her side through her tantrums, through her despair. Miku braved every storm that she had gone through.

All of a sudden, Sorane was alone again.

She was alone again. She had to suffer the rain alone. Her tears went unnoticed once more. Her screams were ignored again. There was nobody next to her, holding her hand. There was no steady force beside her anymore. Nothing to set her straight, nothing to support her when she needed it most. It didn't feel right.

The young actress sighed as she shook her head, running a hand through her hair. It was true, she had been missing something ever since she had blown her top.

She left her position on the bed, stepping over to her table – rummaging through the drawers in the low light of her lamp. She pulled out notebooks filled with contact details and acting tips. She pushed past random stacks of merchandise. Eventually reaching the treasures buried deep.

Sorane drew out those treasures. She flicked them open – birthday card after birthday card. Christmas. Even Valentine's. All from Miku. She had read them before, but perhaps it would comfort her if she were to read them again, now.

_Sorane! _

_Otanjoubi Omedetou! _

_I'm wishing you a fantastic year! And remember, no matter what happens, let's stick together! I'll be here for you no matter what =]_

She placed that aside, picking up a Valentine's Day card.

_Happy Valentine's Sorane ~_

_I'm giving you a card because you're very important to me – we're best friends after all! Let's take on life bravely, together!_

_I'm grateful that I met you!_

Sorane read the messages, one after the other. She didn't question the words – if they were true. It was undeniable that Miku had meant every word she had written. Every single character she had placed on the fancy paper had been totally honest.

_So why did she leave me after that …_ That question echoed in Sorane's mind as she struggled for an answer.

She leaned back on her chair, thinking. What had triggered the change? What had allowed them to turn in different directions? The seconds ticked by … the minutes rolled on. And slowly and answer emerged.

_Miku was angry too. But she didn't try to patch things up … because she thought this is what I wanted?_ There was nothing definite to back this assumption, but it was what Sorane was going to believe.

She had to believe it if she was going to speak the Miku again.

Sorane was relying on her fake world again, but at least she was using it to face reality.

The cogs and wheels were turning.

She was finally moving forward.

_A sparkling clock,_

_Opal hands tick by,_

_Numbers glimmer in the light,_

_I'm shining,_

_As I move on,_

_Though the endless road of time …_

**A/N **- As I wrote this, I got this intense feeling that it was ... very filler-ish XD And at the same time, it contained some important plot elements. To be specific, Sorane. I'm going to put this out bluntly - Sorane is a very complex person. It had difficulty dealing with her in earlier chapters and as such, I felt that her character turned out awkwardly. Moving on, Lavi is getting on a plane soon -oopsspoiler- Apologies for the wait, and please look forward to the next chapter! =]

Also, remember that poll I set up? Right now, Man is leading by quite a margin XD At this rate, my next fic is going to be another one.


	33. Chapter 33 Pledge, Change, Love

Diamond Rose

Chapter 33

Pledge, Change, Love

The days drifted by. The numbers flowed in. The seconds passed.

Everything was moving forward.

But there were a certain pair of people who wanted so desperately to stay still. They wanted time to stop. They wanted to remain moored at this place in time. They did not want to move forward, although it was inevitable that they would.

One of the two was none other than Miku.

It was on the morning of December 20th. The day that Lavi was destined to leave. 'Destined' may have been too romantic of a word, but it was true. He was going to get on a flight set for England and there was nothing that could stop him.

Well, there were several highly unlikely possibilities.

Highly unlikely.

Surrendering to fate, she dragged herself out of bed this morning, flipping through her wardrobe. The process seemed to be unnaturally long all of a sudden. She wanted to look her best for him, so why not play up her charm points, she decided. But suddenly, she found herself wanting to wear a lot of things. Was she to choose the sleeveless top and pair them with a skirt and stockings? Or was she to pull on a tight-fitting coatdress and wear knee-high boots? One would think that fretting over such small details on such an important day was a stupid thing to do.

But to Miku, it was vital.

It was going to be the last time he saw her for a long while, after all.

It seemed like an age until she finally settled for a sleeveless graphic print tee, cropped leather jacket, black denim short shorts, black leggings, grey leg warmers and a pair of red chucks. Perhaps it was too colourful an outfit (yes, two different colours counted as 'too colourful) but it was what Miku was going to see Lavi off in. She didn't want to leave him an image of her dressed in drab tones. After all, if there was one thing she thought of when one spoke his name, it was colour.

All the time she had spent with him was amazing. Every moment was vibrant. Every moment too precious to lose or waste. As she thought this, brushing her teeth in her pyjamas (she had yet to change into her choice of apparel) in front of the mirror, her eyes lingered on her hair. It was black now. The stylists had chopped and dyed so that the red streak was gone. It hadn't disturbed her much at the time, but now it did. It irritated her, provoked her. To do _something_. She didn't know what though.

The answer leaped out at her, causing her to fly into a flurry of activity. Within five minutes – for she had skipped breakfast – she was out the door and rushing to her favourite hair-dresser. Who cared what her manager would say afterwards. It didn't matter.

Her world revolved around Lavi now.

* * *

Nobody decided to get a flight to England and on the day before, decide to catch a later flight.

Nobody except Lavi had the guts to request that.

His manager had flown into a rage, shouting and berating him – telling him that it was impossible. The model just jabbed his thumb at the nearest laptop and told him to find another ticket.

His manager found two tickets and bought them.

Lavi was positively beaming as he left his former living quarters, leaving his manager behind, fuming while packing up the remains of their belongings. He would be happily seeking out his girlfriend and spending the day with her, if possible.

His thumb navigated through the menus on his phone expertly and within seconds, he was waiting for Miku to answer her phone.

She answered on the third ring.

"Lavi!"

"Ohayou~"

It bothered Miku that he was able to maintain such a cheerful tone of voice. It made her feel guilty, almost. "You too." There was a warm smile on her face, something, deep down, wished that Lavi could see it.

"Where are you now?"

"I …" Miku considered answering, but something made her hold back. "Umm, I can't tell you now." She took a breath as she continued to speak, "Can you come around to Brilliance Hair?"

This information made Lavi curious. A hair salon? Why a hair salon? He didn't bother questioning her, despite his curiosity. "Oh, sure."

"Do you know where it is?"

"No. I'll grab a taxi."

* * *

Not too long after that phone call, Miku was standing at the door of the salon. She felt oddly self-conscious. She knew that Lavi would be outside, waiting, as instructed by the attendant she had spoken to earlier. She didn't know though, whether or not Lavi would like her new hair.

Miku had ordered her hairdresser to attack it with scissors, cutting it short so it tickled her chin, and then went on to get purple highlights. The new hairdo had been enough to make Miku stare at herself in the mirror and go, _that's ME?_ But it was most definitely her.

She heaved a breath, stepped forward and pushed the door open.

Time to move forward.

* * *

_Woah._

That was the first thing that passed Lavi's mind when he laid eyes on Miku. He took in her appearance. She had chopped off half her hair and shameless tinted it purple. The overall effect was new, and rather contrary to his original image of her.

Miku, the hard-working, down-to-earth girl. That kind of girl usually didn't race headfirst into a hasty decision. Especially with hair.

But somebody undeniably had.

Lavi was shaken out of his thoughts when she spoke, addressing him with a nervous smile.

"How is it?"

He said the first thing that popped up in his mind. "Crazy."

The expression on her face was priceless, "Woah, it's that bad?"

Lavi franticly denied this interpretation, "Uh – no, that's not what I meant." A hand flew up to his forehead as he sighed, irritated at his own stupidity. "It suits you."

To his immense relief and joy, a smile appeared on Miku's face.

She had been tentative about showing him, and as she was getting her hair done, the option of dodging out had occurred to her several times. Hearing his words had been enough to put her at ease. It had been worthwhile. She didn't look horrendous. So far, so good. That is, until she heard what her boyfriend said next.

"You should cover up more though, it's really cold."

This comment on the weather, Miku wasn't able to deny. She had barely noticed on her way here though, she had been much too focused on what her head was going to look like afterwards. She bit her lip as she looked up at Lavi after studying her legs, "What should I do?"

"I'm thinking skinny jeans. Black."

She sighed as she headed to his side, took his hand and proceeded to make for the door.

Lavi was bewildered. "Hey – where are we going?"

Those blue eyes connected with his for only a moment, "Home."

"Wait – your place?"

"Yeah."

Lavi was starting to grow worried, "Uh-"

"Pervert, we're only going so I can change."

* * *

Hours later, the two were sitting beside one another in a darkly-lit taxi, rushing along a busy road towards the airport. Their hands were entwined between them, laying on the seat. Occasionally, their gaze would meet, but most of the time, they stared outside at the deep blue sky.

They didn't speak, yet it wasn't an awkward silence.

Thoughts flooded their minds. There was so much to say, so much to do. But they wouldn't be able to lay eyes on one another for so long. They wouldn't be able to hold hands. They wouldn't be able to hear the other's voice, clear and ride beside their ear. How long would it stay that way? Was there anything they could do about it?

No answers came.

No movements were made.

When they pulled up at Departures, the pair exited. Lavi spotted his manager, pacing with their luggage beside him. Miku's manager was sitting on a chair nearby, obviously, they had been waiting for them both. After a moment's hesitation, fingers still entwined, palms still pressed together, they walked forward.

It wasn't hard to spot the crowd of reporters and photographers being held back by airport security. Neither of the pair wanted to know how long their managers had suffered beneath the camera lenses and microphones.

Lavi's manager rushed up to them immediately, "Lavi, we need to get going –"

"Yeah, I know." He glanced at the crowd that desperately wanted a word. The flashes were increasing by the second too. "I'll deal with-"

"Don't cause unnecessary drama, they don't need to hear –"

Lavi was stubborn beyond belief, "I'm going –"

"Hey, think about Miku's career."

Here, Miku's manager spoke up, "Personally, I'm fine with it, just don't say anything that will have a negative effect on her position. There has been enough hate mail flying into the offices."

Lavi grinned, and started to pull Miku over. Had it not been Lavi, she would have freaked out, tried running away. But somehow, he gave her strength – she could face the crowd. She could. Somehow.

As they approached, voices were raised, questions were asked.

Lavi took the initiative, "Could everyone be quiet, please? One at a time?"

Their shouts turned into murmurs. Some fans seemed to have appeared out of nowhere and were beginning to gather at the edges of the scene.

A reporter spoke up first, "Bookman-san, we heard that you wouldn't be able to return for at least six months, what will happen to your relationship with Kawaguchi-san?"

That was clearly the question on everybody's minds. Lavi drew a breath before looking at Miku. A surge of pride and strength met him when he saw her smile at him. It was a tentative smile, but it was brave as well. She was willing to face forward, and he would be there to do it beside her.

"There's no way that we can be sure that a long-distance relationship will work, but we are most certainly able to wait for one another."

"Kawaguchi-san, do you feel the same?"

The honest smile that filled her features was undoubtedly genuine, "Yes. I will wait for all eternity if necessary."

Perhaps it was cheesy. Perhaps she'd be criticised for her belief. But it didn't matter, for Lavi had pulled her in right there, and kissed her. One hand was tangled in her hair, one wrapped around her waist.

Miku was crying.

For once, she wasn't entirely sure whether they were tears of joy or sadness.

Whatever they were, it was a promise.

They'd wait for eternity.

_You could be anywhere,_

_I'll meet your there,_

_You could be anywhere,_

_Open your eyes and see everything you can be,_

_I'll meet you there.

* * *

_

**A/N - **I just had to get this done and uploaded by today. Happy Valentine's Day everyone ! Although, my story certainly don't go along with the mood that today's supposed to set XD Writing this chapter was both delightful and torturous and I really hope that my efforts paid off! I hope you enjoy it! Also, the next chapter will be the beginning of the final arc. Look forward to it, please ! =D

Also, the lyrics at the end of the chappie - they're from Owl City's "I'll Meet You There", it's a beautiful song ! Owl City is one of my favourite artists XD

Thank you for reviewing, and it'd totally make my day if you reviewed! =]


	34. Chapter 34 Silent Snowdome

Diamond Rose

Chapter 34

Silent Snowdome

Miku stepped out of the limousine, feeling rather self-conscious. Flight Records' CEO tended to go overboard with party preparations. The decorations were luxurious to the point where it was ridiculous. Silver tinsel, paper snowflakes, three chandeliers. That wasn't even beginning to cover it. Not only that, a lot of big names were invited. All of the artists signed into Flight Records attended, reporters from various newspapers and magazines were granted entry. Of course, all employees of Flight Records attended. Thus, one really couldn't afford to turn up looking sloppy.

As such, her new stylist (Lenalee was now working in Korea, bickering with Kanda and facing a possible engagement) had shoved her into a tight-fitting dress. It was black, and while the neckline was of decent height, the back was fairly low. At least it was long sleeved, ending in bell sleeves that would undoubtedly cause her some trouble – depending on what she chose to eat that night (which would not be much). It had an empire waistline and a bow was fastened above the skirt – which fell above her knees. She was also wearing black stockings and stilettos. Her hair had been worked with, and she now had extensions so her hair fell to her back. She had kept the purple streaks though.

When she entered, Miku found heads turning in her direction, like all those camera flashes outside had not been enough. Even so, she had been expecting that reaction. Many of her label-mates had sent her emails and texts regarding her relationship, but she had failed to answer in detail. The press had made Lavi's departure seem like such a big deal, and it had been less than a week, so of course, it was still front-page news. _I really wish they'd find something else to talk about_. Speaking of which, there was her re-debut.

After LaKu was disbanded (there was no choice, after all, Lavi's contract had been terminated – no renewals in sight), Miku set to work, and had a digital single released on Christmas Day. She had barely slept those past few days, and it was miracle that she could summon the energy to attend the party at all. At least, she could afford to laze around a little the next few weeks, her physical debut single was set to be released on February 14th. Yes. Valentine's Day. Without Lavi.

Miku discarded those thoughts and headed in, finding her seat, taking note of its position and bumping into Allen Walker immediately.

She smiled, slightly tired, "Hi, Allen."

"Good evening, Miku. How are you?"

A sour laugh left her mouth, "Excellent, clearly."

"Sheesh. You need rest." The concern was obvious.

"Yes, I know I do."

"Why are you here?"

Miku rolled her eyes, "Can you imagine the fuss that I'd kick up if I didn't attend?"

Allen nodded, suddenly finding great interest in the ceiling, "Yes, that's true. The press is full of idiots."

A very familiar voice was upon them a second later. "Good evening."

It was none other than Sorane.

Miku looked at her, blue eyes stony cold, "Good evening to you as well. You were invited?"

She nodded, staring at Allen, who looked increasingly uncomfortable. He was also eying a passing tray of food rather intently. "Yes. I'm working with –"

Allen dived into the situation at that moment, "Sorane, we should talk, oh, I'd like to introduce you to someone …"

Things looked rather fishy.

* * *

Ayumu had never been very fond of anything related to the word "formal". But here he was, dressed in a suit – at least he had escaped the nightmare of a tie (for he had ditched it a moment earlier). Possibly worse was the girl that was currently following him like a shadow.

Her name was Road Camelot.

"Why don't you talk to someone?"

"I _am_ talking to someone." He replied through gritted teeth, irritation leaking out of his profile.

Road rolled her eyes as she continued to follow him past tables and mingling groups, "Apart from me."

"Then leave me alone."

"If I did, you'd find some place to hide and avoid everyone."

That was actually what Ayumu desperately wanted to do. He hated the stares and murmurs about him. So what if he was thirteen? So what if he had a debut single set to be released on January 7th? So what if there was a huge amount of money being poured into his production? Would they please stop staring?

He responded to Road, still refusing to look at her. "And what's wrong with it?"

An irritating giggle emerged from her mouth, "We can't have an unfriendly idol."

Ayumu reached a side exit – it led out to a quiet hallway – exactly what he needed. After grabbing the handle and turning it, his hopes plummeted and shattered at the bottom of a mysterious abyss. It was locked. Now, who on earth would have –

"The Earl thought that it'd be a really nice idea to lock all the doors except the main entrance."

This left him seething with rage.

Road just grinned. "Will you behave now?"

When had her voice grown so evil and cunning?

She continued, disregarding his emotions, "If you don't, we might have to pull your creative rights –"

Ayumu turned around, blue eyes fierce. And completely out of the blue, pulled out the tie he had removed from his neck moments earlier, and draped it around her neck like a scarf (an easy task, for he was taller). Surprisingly enough, the midnight blue tie complimented her gothic-style dress, adding a touch of colour that it had been devoid of. "Learn to co-ordinate your outfits better."

And he was gone, mingling with the generally older crowd, a smile appearing on his face.

It was far from genuine, but it was a start.

* * *

Sorane had ditched Allen not too long after her first encounter with Miku, Now she was seeking out the singer again. She had some bonds to repair.

After many short exchanges and apologies, the actress had manoeuvred her way through much of the crowd and finally located Miku. She was speaking to Hevlaska – probably discussing a musically-orientated topic. Perhaps the most effective use of synth effects in a ethereal ballad? Or maybe some vocal trade secrets? Whatever it was, it was something Sorane wouldn't be able to comprehend. She stepped in, remembering her manners, bowing and introducing herself, exchanging the general hellos. A few moments later, she had Miku alone. And there they stood, two beautiful girls in a noisy crowd.

Sorane smiled, not the usual way. The smile displayed her feelings openly. The sadness, the loss she had suffered and brought upon herself – the understanding she had come to find. "Miku."

"How are you?"

The good-natured inquiry brought back sharp pangs. Miku, who always put herself behind others. The one who asked about you, before thinking of herself. Sorane, of course, answered. "I'm fine. I lost something recently though."

Miku blinked, curious. "Hm? What is it?" Perhaps we could find it." A nagging thought at the back of her mind was sending off some alarm signals though. What was going to come next? On second thoughts, she'd rather not find out –

"I lost my best friend."

Shit.

"She was always by my side before. Whenever I was stuck, she always said something to help me. Even if she was busy, she'd always try and make time for us. She would stubbornly tell me about how great a person I supposedly was when I was feeling down and the director was shouting at me."

Call her over-sentimental or emotional, but those words sent tears to her eyes. She didn't want to cry – first off, it was downright embarrassing, secondly, weren't they still on bad terms?

A voice in her head nagged her.

_You're only on bad terms because you make it seem like you're supposed to._

Miku's voice came out half-strangled and weird, "You make your best friend sound so good."

"That's because she is that amazing." Sorane had a brave smile on her face- it was getting difficult to keep it in place, for she was starting to tear up as well. Her vision blurred and wavered as she spoke, trying to maintain some kind of composure.

And all of a sudden, they were just two girls again.

It didn't matter that they were standing in a hall, dressed in designer clothes and dolled up like goddesses.

They were just two friends, who had a juvenile fight.

And they were making up.

Miku swallowed and smiled, tears gathering at her eyes, "I'm sorry, Sorane."

Sorane shamelessly burst into tears as she grabbed her friend and pulled her into a bearhug. For once, the thoughts of others as they looked on did not matter. For once, she was able to embrace reality head-on.

It was snowing.

It was silent.

But it wasn't cold.

_Sometimes the answer to everything,_

_Is oh-so simple …_

**A/N - **I'm so sorry for not updating earlier - school is just BUSY BUSY BUSY. In fact, I have a crapload of Science and Maths homework due tomorrow T_T but since I love my readers and this story so much, I simply HAD to upload. It's been too long, after all! I guess it's a little sad that it took Sorane and Miku 20+ chapters to overcome their issues. As for Ayumu - he vents his anger in weird ways, which explains why he gave Road an accessory. Perhaps he thought he put Road to shame, somehow, and that satisfied him? Haha~ Please look forward to the next chapter ! Thank you ^_^


	35. Chapter 35 Your Voice, Alone

Diamond Rose

Chapter 35

Your Voice, Alone

Lavi had spent the whole trip looking back. After he boarded the plane, he stared out the window at the disappearing city he had come to love. And he wondered painfully, would he be returning any time soon? When would be the next time he heard Miku's voice? When would be the next time he could run his hands through her silky hair, and breath in the scent that was so obviously her's? When? His heart cried out for an answer, but he found nothing.

As he talked out the airport doors, braving that team of paparazzi that tailed him to the company van, he kept his gaze down, not speaking, not looking at them. He didn't want to see this world he had been dragged back to. He wanted to hear her voice, see her smile, hold her hand. The only thing that sent any warmth into him was that one signboard by a fan some distance away, displaying the words; "LaKu FOREVER !" It was rare to see any mention of his Japanese activities in London, although news of his relationship MUST have leaked over.

As he ducked into the van, he sent one smile in the direction of that lone fan, causing a torrent of camera flashes.

And he was gone.

* * *

The days passed by both quickly and slowly. Lavi dragged himself to work, and he was never satisfied with the results. He found himself lacking – he could not recover that dying interest for modelling. He still had the skill, but everything he did felt fake. Fake. Fake. Fake. He began to dread the bright lights and cameras. He wanted to accompany Miku's beautiful voice.

Lavi was thinking deeply on his first day off – Christmas day. He lingered in his apartment, watching the snow fall from the grey skies. And he wondered, how was she?

Would she write? Would she call if she could?

In a way, he was suffering withdrawal symptoms and it was barely a week.

_How much longer will I be stuck here?_ He mused painfully. He was about to drift off on the couch, staring up at the ceiling when his phone rang. He checked the caller ID and contemplated answering upon seeing that it was his manager. He didn't want another job, not this soon, and he really didn't want any invites out. But Lavi found himself taking a risk.

He answered. "Yes?"

"Lavi, there's a letter from Miku."

_What?_ He swallowed, suddenly wondering if his mind was playing tricks, "Miku?"

"Yes, it looks like her agency forwarded it to us for her."

"Can you bring it over?"

A laugh. "I knew you were going to say that. I'm parked outside, I'll bring it up."

Lavi hung up there and grabbed a coat. He was out the door and down the stairs, just as his manager reached the doorsteps of the apartment. For the first time in a while, he looked at his manager in the eye, smiled and said, "Thank you."

Things just seemed to get stranger this Christmas day.

* * *

When Lavi opened the letter, he hesitated. He had the paper in his hands, still folded so he could not see the words. He breathed deeply. He did not know of what made him feel this way – nervous. He didn't know what it was going to say. How was she coping over there? He hadn't had a chance to dig up any news regarding her yet.

He sucked in a breath and unfolded the paper and started reading.

_Lavi,_

_It's me. Miku. I guess that was rather unnecessary. Anyway … I hope you arrived safely. I'm guessing that my letter will arrive at around Christmas. So, Merry Christmas. I hope you aren't too lonely there. Or should I say, I want to be with you. _

_Are they overworking you? Are you healthy? Is it cold there? I have a lot of questions to ask, and I'm sorry that I couldn't call yet. My manager decided to push ahead with my career and had me very busy. I'm going to be honest and say that I only got a few hours of sleep every night. But it's okay now, I can rest more. Recording is over for the moment. Of course, I plan to work harder than ever In the coming months._

_In fact, I'm more worried about you than me. You never told me about your modelling job. To be honest, I had always thought you didn't enjoy it fully, even though you were so good at it - so experienced. _

_I'm sorry if I'm nagging. You don't have to talk about it._

_Speaking of talking, is it possible for you to send over your home number? I already have your mobile, but overseas calls on mobiles are always a pain. Perhaps I'm too picky. But I really want to hear your voice without sitting through an agonizing process with a robotic voice._

_I miss you._

"_Let's look up at the same sky,_

_Maybe you'll be looking too,_

_Indirectly, indirectly,_

_We're looking at each other …"_

_Those are lyrics to my new song. I won't tell you much more, except that it's scheduled to be released on Valentine's Day. Ironic, somehow. Is it snowing in London? The weather forecast in Tokyo talks about a possible "White Christmas". I hope it's that way for you, as well. The snow is always beautiful._

_I love you._

_Miku._

Lavi blinked when he reached the end of the page. So much had happened already. She was carrying on with her life, her career. In a way, he disliked it. That she was carrying on, without him. And still, he found a kind of pride in it, he was happy that she was able to work as hard as ever, and pour her heart out with her voice. In a way, he felt that it was magic.

It bothered him though, that she seemed to be living in an unhealthy way. She had confessed to it, at the very least – which was no doubt an improvement from her old self. But it nagged at him, ate at him that she seemed to make no serious effort to rest.

In fact, he had the idea that she may be intent on working herself to a state of complete exhaustion. He sighed as he stopped staring at the page, and gazed aimlessly out the window instead.

It was just as she had hoped, it was snowing.

And as he looked out at the sky, he wondered if she was looking too.

* * *

The day dragged on. Never before had Lavi spent Christmas alone. It had always been out of three options: his family, his adoptive father, or his 'workmates'. This Christmas was no exception for his guardian, had visited and they had shared a decent afternoon, drinking tea and complaining about their lives while drowning in an atmosphere of nostalgia. In a way, it was awkward, and yet the redhead relished that strange situation. It was like visiting an embarrassing friend.

Eventually, he was gone and Lavi was left alone again in his apartment. Every ten or so minutes, he would receive a message or a call from an old friend. Some begged him to join their rowdy celebration, while others were much more reserved and simply sent him the general messages of goodwill many conveyed to one another that holiday.

Strangely enough, he was not expecting one from Miku.

There were practical reasons – for one, he was positive that she was attending the Christmas Party that her label held, for her absence may lead to bad publicity. On the other hand, there was nothing stopping her from sitting painfully through the service that finally connected their phones. Unless she didn't miss him enough?

That thought sent a rather unhealthy feeling through him. Did she still love him? Once he was out of the country, was he just a disembodied entity, floating beyond her reach and no longer connected to her? Did she really miss him? Did she?

Once those doubts started to flood his mind, he grew frustrated, angry at himself. He was doubting her. In less than a week, and such doubts were already surfacing? It made him sick, almost.

Eventually, he was the one with the phone in hand and dialling her number.

It didn't matter how long he was up. He needed to hear her voice.

He yearned to hear her voice.

That was all he wanted for Christmas.

_Let's look up at the same sky,_

_Maybe you'll be looking too,_

_Indirectly, indirectly,_

_We're looking at each other …_

**A/N - **the chapter is finally out ! Haha~ Although it was very hard for me to find time to write this chapter, I truly enjoyed it. I guess Lavi's thoughts were just so heart breaking and sweet at the same time. Hopefully, I won't take as long to come up with the next chapter - wish me luck? =] I hope you enjoyed it! And remember, reviewing = WIN.

Thank you !


	36. Chapter 36 Another Accident

Diamond Rose

Chapter 36

Another Accident

It had been three months since Lavi's call on Christmas Day. Since then, time had passed as it always had, and the two had been forced to walk their paths, for they could not turn back. They walked parallel, not crossing over. Not yet.

Miku's debut single, _Future_, sold well, partly due to her previous success with Lavi but also due to the many promotional activities she did. Live performances on TV stations, in many large CD stores, even at an opening of a hotel (the Ark Hotel chain was a side project of her label's CEO). Handshake events, three fan meets, one after the other. _Future_ maintained its spot on the Oricon charts at #12 for two weeks before slipping off. It was no doubt a good start.

Ayumu was also working hard. He had beaten his sister easily in sales, what with his almost strange way of promoting. For one, his debut single, _Chained To You_ was released in four versions, he had fought with the producer over how the PV was to be made, and largely won. He appeared on every music program possible, wormed his way into Hevlaska's teaser track for her album, and had made a public appearance at an outdoor venue in Tokyo every single week for nearly two months. He had miraculously gained a position at #7 on the Oricon Charts for two weeks and lingered in the top 20 for another week before slipping off. Now, he was collaborating with Road Camelot for her comeback (the last time she had released anything was a year ago).

Lavi was doing well. His schedules came to have a steadier pace. Shoots came every three or so weeks, and in between, his time was spent filling in for other models and participating in minor group shoots. The slow days that remained left him wondering if it was worth using his brain for college and communicating with Miku. Her blog became something he visited once every two or so days, he waited for her letters, and every single word they exchanged over the phone, he anticipated. And day after day, he waited for his ticket back to Japan.

And really, Miku was no different. She would drag herself home after a day of training and recording, sit down, and rifle through her father's mail after finding nothing on her table, in hopes of seeing an envelope from Lavi. She called, hoping that he was available, she left messages. She penned lyrics filled with the things she wanted to tell him for her debut album.

They both waited, for it was the only thing they could do at the time.

* * *

"Miku!"

"Coming!" The singer who had eagerly responded to her name came bolting out of the dressing room. She had an asymmetrical navy blue cardigan on over the dress she had been performing in a moment earlier. It was a deep red and floor length, meaning that she had to hitch it up with her hand so it hung around her knees as she gathered her canvas backpack and headed out the door. Her nerves weren't completely settled after the performance and where she was headed wasn't anywhere she could really relax either. At least, not until she braved a flood of camera flashes.

It was Sorane's movie premier.

Her friend had been working on a movie for some time, and its progress had only been revealed to the public in January. It was a huge scale thing, and it was predicted to be a box-office hit. Miku and Sorane certainly hoped so. And today was finally the day of the movie premier. Naturally, Miku would have to dress very well for this occasion, otherwise her best friend would skewer her later (it was common knowledge that the actress and singer were good friends).

Some thirty minutes later, Miku hoped into a limousine. She was dressed in an empire waist, red dress. Her hair was gathered into two simple, low pigtails, tied with scarlet ribbons. The singer had also finally mastered stilettos but ditched them for a pair of red kitten heels, despite her stylist's nagging. This made her think of Lenalee and Kanda. They were getting married in April, and they had returned to Japan for that occasion. From a phone call earlier that day, Miku knew that both were attending the premier. It was like a gathering of old friends, (Allen was going too).

Only Lavi wasn't there.

She sighed as she took in that detail. She watched the city streets rush past as she headed for her destination.

Little did she know that when she left that morning, the postman had come along. He had deposited several envelopes into their mailbox.

One had been addressed to her.

It contained a letter she would never come to read.

* * *

_Miku,_

_I'm coming back. Well, actually, that's just me being impulsive. I am returning, though. I will be boarding a plane and head for Tokyo tomorrow. In fact, you might receive this letter after I see you, but who knows. _

_I will only be in Tokyo for a week at the most, but shooting lasts four days. Maybe five, depending on how good the magazines' Tokyo branch is. So perhaps we will have two days for ourselves. I certainly hope so._

_I'll call you._

_There's so much to say._

_Lavi._

* * *

Sorane was worried. The premier had officially begun, five minutes in, she did not see Miku. Allen had arrived ahead, and according to him, she was definitely coming. She had tried texting, but she got no reply. She called, and she received a "no service is available" message. Allen did the same. He got no response. Sorane and Allen had dismissed their friends' absence for a small moment to send Lenalee and Kanda their greetings. When Lenalee inquired about Miku's whereabouts their worry resurfaced, and phone calls were made again. Sorane also made efforts to track down Miku's manager, who was present at the premier. Apparently, Miku should have arrived earlier – her manager had also been concerned.

In the middle of the opening credits, their manager had hauled the four of them aside, into the lobby. There was news.

Kawaguchi Miku was in an accident.

Sorane was frantic. "What news do we have, is she injured –"

"We will head over to the hospital, but I think you should stay –"

"I don't care if this is my movie premier, my best friend was in an accident –"

Allen interrupted, "Sorane, stay. I'll call you and get you over to the hospital immediately if it's serious –"

Sorane huffed, "I can't believe this –"

Lenalee stepped in, "It's the best, I promise we'll let you know as soon as possible –"

"fine." The actress sighed and started to head back inside, "hurry."

* * *

Ayumu had heard the news from Lulubell. Ignoring her warnings, he had headed out of his apartment for the hospital. News of the accident had reached the major TV networks already. The taxi and delivery van that had collided with the stretch limousine had caused a major traffic blockage, and who was going to ignore the passenger in the stretch limo? As soon as Miku had been identified and sent to the nearest hospital, journalists were ecstatic. Kawaguchi Miku, in an accident.

Just like her mother.

Ayumu ignored the reporters that immediately surrounded him the moment he stepped out of the taxi. They fired questions at him, he barred them all. He did not cared about what those cameras filmed or captured. He was here for his sister. Why did they have to get into the way?

It took him ten minutes to make it to the goddamned door and when he was let in, the hospital staff weren't much help at all. Ayumu could understand why – it had been a major accident, the two smaller vehicles had been set aflame, while the limousine had been torn in two. If that wasn't major, what was? Even so, it frustrated him to find that he was told to just wait. Wait. Wait while they did what? Saved his sister's life? There was no guarantee that was happening. He didn't know what was going on the ER.

He found that when he sat down, his hands were shaking.

He didn't want to lose another family member.

* * *

_I don't want to lose anything more._

_Promise me._

_You'll stay._

* * *

**A/N** - guys. I'm so sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. I didn't update for so long ... But I hope this chapter, filled with plot-moving material made up for it. Tell me what you thought of this chapter! And yes, the end is drawing near.


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